We get along great but i am not happy living with her anymore. We have so many outlooks in life and I am going in a completely different direction in life than she is
2006-10-29 11:47:41 · 15 answers · asked by rcspaint@sbcglobal.net 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Just say it exactly that way.
Who are you kidding? It won't matter how you tell her, you have no chance of being her friend, at least not immediately, if ever! Is that the best reason you can come up with?
Go off and find yourself, just hope you don't end up wishing you'd stayed with her. I'm sure she will have moved on.
2006-10-29 12:42:34 · answer #1 · answered by Chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she had no idea what you're about to tell her, you should probably start out on a Friday evening (if that's the beginning of your weekend) by going out to dinner and start talking about how each of you feels in this relationship. Start out by asking her if she's happy and still feels that "connection." If you are truly going in different directions, then this should be easy. Just be totally honest in all that you communicate and all should go well. But don't mention the friends thing; that'll come on it's own. Good luck to you.
2006-10-29 12:53:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i guess you have to think about it a lot especially if there are kids involved. you know that she will be very hurt in the beginning so its not that easy. anyways, you can tell her honestly on what you feel. tell her that there's nothing wrong with her, coz she might loose some confidence when you broke up with her, but its just kinda hard to live with a person who differs with your outlooks in life.
2006-10-29 11:58:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest! Don't expect friendship right away. Are there kids involved? Then don't expect a friendship for even longer (but that is only in some cases). Maybe she feels the same way you do and just is not saying anything...
2006-10-29 11:51:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't tell her you want to stay as friends. When you tell her you are leaving, it's just not the time to mention friendship. You tell her your desire to leave and the reasons for it and whatever happens after that you just deal with.
At that point she has no interest in your desire to stay friends, she has her future to consider. Just try to stay in contact and especially if children are involved be available if she needs your help or advice.
2006-10-29 12:00:02 · answer #5 · answered by Nort 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't expect to remain friends with her in the beginning. She is going to need time to cope with things and to heal. Then, maybe, she might consider being your friend. But can you really blame her if she chooses not to?
2006-10-29 11:51:21 · answer #6 · answered by shellese2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dear friend
I am going through the same thing. sounds exactly like it. he said the same thing. my husband of 18yrs just left and told me the same thing. he said he loves me he,s just not in love with me. we are getting a divorce and been sep for a yr now. i had loved him very much. but he did change. we are friends but it is very hard emotionaly. very. there is nothing you can do or say that will not make the pain go away. unless she is no longer in love with you to. she will be very hurt if she is in love with you. there is not much you can do. the best thing i can tell you is just be there for her. she will go through many ups and downs. remember to her its like lossing a love one in death. what died is your marriage. but she will go through the same reactions. she will cry, and hate you, be angry, lots of emoitons. so be ready for all of them. but mostly let her know its not her but you have changed and she desevers to be with some one who can meet her needs. remember this is your doing not hers. so be prepared for it. and if you really want to stay friends with her then be there as a friend. my ex and i im each other allot. almost every day infact. it seems to be better that way. we cry together and laugh. and there are times i feel like i just can't get through another day. and he is there. what is hard he is the reason i cry yet he is the one that gets me through the day some times. but he will say over and over he is sorry and he is there. he pays more then he has to. because he knows it wasn't my fault and he is the one who wanted out. just remember it hurts the other person like hell and so be prepared to hear many things that aren't nice but just take it cuz sooner or later it dose get better. like i said its been a yr for me and it still hurts. and don't bring the new girlfriend around untill she is ready. its one thing to know you moved on. its another to see it. even tho my husband did me wrong, i do love him very much. so we try to stay friends but its not easy some times. remember to not let the hurt get in the way of the out come you really want. that is what i try to keep in mind when i am really hurting. and that is what is it that i really want. and so some times i have to let things that hurt go so i can have what i want later. but trust me, its not easy
2006-10-29 12:32:35 · answer #7 · answered by just a mom 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gee....(in a whiney voice) I am not happy anymore...so I will leave my commitments and obligations.
Happiness comes from within, you cannot seek happiness from others.
2006-10-29 11:52:42 · answer #8 · answered by OleMarbleEyes 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
On a phone, from far far away. She's gonna want to know why she's good enuff to be your friend but not your wife. I hope you have a good reason.
2006-10-29 11:57:54 · answer #9 · answered by RadAz 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you should rot in hell and should have never got married marrage is for life and if you love her you could make it work
2006-10-29 12:00:04 · answer #10 · answered by ashley l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋