Very lonely, no love of affection chirldhood as parents gave me away to some relatives. But they took me back and pretended nothing happened when i was 4...
2006-10-29 07:37:26 · 4 answers · asked by confusedgirl 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
A lot of things can contribute to unhappy relationships in a person's life. It sounds like you have had a rough go of it, dear. I also had a very lonely childhood...one filled with abuses of all types, untruths by my parents and lack of validation for everything that made me the wonderful individual I was. A kid needs love, warmth, trust and honesty from people who surround him or her during childhood. These people don't necessarily have to be the biological parents but these people have to be present and constant in a child's life. Having loving people present and constant gives a child a sense of security and reliability. Without these factors, this child will grow up with a deep sense of insecurity and mistrust, among other things....this will not bode well for relationships of all types in adulthood.
To cut to the chase, without loving, trustworthy and honest people around you as a child, you will see people as being untrustworthy and dishonest...let's not even factor in your ability not to give freely of love. This happened to me throughout my childhood. Until 6 1/2 years ago when I met my life mate, Bill, I was unable to sustain the trust and love that are necessary to foster healthy relationships.
I basically took the time to get into some psychological therapy and find out who I AM. It has taken 10 years but now I seem to be able to face the world and be able to semi-trust your average person. I still have issues with your average person and I still don't truly LIKE the average person (I WORSHIP the disabled, all animals, plants and Bill) but I have come a long way.
Therapy helped me a great deal along with medication, a calm life and treating my body like a temple.
The best advice I can give you now is to forgive the people in your past and take care of YOURSELF. Get some good therapy with a therapist you can trust. There are many available in your community that will see you on a sliding fee scale or free.
Good luck, dear. You are in our prayers.
2006-10-29 08:18:52 · answer #1 · answered by bjorktwin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's possible they were going through hard times and felt they could not provide for you the way they felt you deserved until you were four. People make mistakes and fall on hard times. Try to leave the past in the past and not let it affect your future. Your future is as bright as you make it. It's possible you could use some counseling to help you move forward and into beautiful and fulfilling relationships. Good luck.
2006-10-29 15:46:25 · answer #2 · answered by Curious George 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would seek help from teachers & of your aunts but no your uncle's unless they are straight forward~ but it diffently might have a big effect on you somewhat and it is hard to help but I an problely others wish you the best if your not content on living by yourself. I hope you are involved in voulenteering or that and that you have selfesteem in life to procede on! Best wishes
2006-10-29 16:08:00 · answer #3 · answered by David H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, if you did not have an active social life as a child, or was ignored by unaffectionate parents, then it does have a huge impact on your relationships.
2006-10-29 15:45:59 · answer #4 · answered by Liv 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋