Okay, need help turning my mindset around BIG TIME. I considered creating a new username just to ask this!!?

Question

This is really embarrassing -- Okay, now please don't just reply saying to just 'suck it up' or 'do a reality check', because I've tried telling myself that and it hasn't helped--Here it is: My husband and I have been together for 6 years and I was in a previous marriage before that, and with HIM for 12 yrs. I didn't have this issue with my ex, but it has cropped up now and is truly ruling my life. I can't stand the sexiness in today's media (I'm 34) like music videos, TV, movies, songs, etc, and although my husband is totally faithful and has loved me at my various weights (and looks at me like I'm a princess even when I'm hideous), I can't help but feel sort of panicky at the thought of watching scenes with gorgeous women or those acting sexy. He doesn't watch porn and is sooo devoted, but I still feel insecure. I promise I'm not making this up. You know how sometimes someone will just say that 1 right thing that helps you to snap you out of something? That's what I'm looking for. Th

Answer 1

let me first start out by saying that i know EXACTLY what you are feeling. i am in a serious relationship with my man and he too is very devoted and loving no matter how much i weigh. BUT when we are watching tv or out somewhere and i see something that i think he may be attracted to i try and change the channel or walk somewhere else. he laughs at me and thinks its funny but doesn't realize how insanely insecure i really am. i hate to tell you but there is no "quick fix" to this probelm. i think the only solution is to look within yourself and see how you can make yourself feel better and fix your self esteem, then everything else should get better.... at least this is what i have been told. good luck.

Answer 2

The first thing you need to do is stop putting yourself down, our bodies are just the shell that holds the important things like who we are and how we feel.

You hubby obviously sees past the shell to the inner person, that's a good thing it means he isn't shallow and insecure.

We all loose our looks at one point or another, but what's inside stays forever.

Porn movies are just entertaiment, you don't really think that real woman look like that do you, thats all plastic surgery and makeup

Heck not even the men in those can do what they appear to do on stage, they have fluffers just to keep them able to perform. It's acting, its not real, don't feel threatened by them. They arn't real. Once they take off their makeup and put on normal clothes they don't look that way.

You need to work on your self esteme and feel good about yourself. Your hubby already see's the beautiful person you are inside now you need to see it.

He married YOU not a Porn Star or a model with nothing in their heads.

Hang in there girl, you got your man and he loves you, don't throw it away over a non-existant threat.

Answer 3

A lot of women feel that way. Try to trust not only him more but youself. You're a great person and you deserve him! So don't worry about those shallow TV stars. Take care :)

Answer 4

i don't know what you fell that way but if you have a man the loves you and is devoted to you,what is the reason then? i think the you think on what can happen and that is not good, you need to be glad the you have a man the loves you. stop worryng. God bless you