I have the proof. Spoke to the chick. He has been away for work for a month. I have no way of communicating with him. He is coming home soon. I dont want to break up. I am afraid its to late. I dont want to tear apart my family. I am losing my mind. Any advice. The main thing is I dont know how he feels. I am not sure if he knows I know. He probably does. Left all the proof so he could get caught.
2006-10-29 03:54:53 · 20 answers · asked by me 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if he wants out than there is nothing you can do about it but talk to him maybe there is something you are doing that you need to change if you really want to keep him maybe you can do it but the decision is his all you can do is try but if he don't love you than you will both just be miserable and it would be best to let him go my favorite saying is if you love something let it go and if it comes back it is yours and if it don't it never was so just wait and see you can try but if it is not meant to be let him go and find the right man for you!!!!
God bless take it from some one that has been there and done that!!!
2006-10-29 04:07:06 · answer #1 · answered by mel416 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have two choices. Either you can confront him directly about his affair, or you can fake ignorance. I would advice the latter. In which case the ball is in your court to play like you wish. In stead of be the nagging, aggrieved wife, start working on a new attitude. Change your looks for the better. Be warm, friendly en confident when he comes home, but keep a little distance from him. This will let him wonder what is going on, if you have met someone else. The idea is to force him to look at you from a different point of view. To start loving, admiring and desiring you again. If this approach wouldn't take his attention away from his mistress, I don't know what will. Good luck.
2006-10-29 05:41:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if he wanted to get caught, he either doesn't care how you feel about it or he's looking for a way out of this relationship. Maybe he's expecting you to dump his sorry *ss, AS YOU SHOULD. You don't want to tear your family apart? Sorry honey, too late...he already did that when he couldn't keep it in his pants. Kids or no kids, there's never a good enough reason to stay with someone who obviously has NO RESPECT for you. Kick his fat *ss to the curb and get on with your life. If he "says" he wants to stay and you decided to try and work things out, then YOU MAKE HIM COME CRAWLING BACK. I mean you really really make him work for it. Good luck!!
2006-10-29 04:05:35 · answer #3 · answered by marcia_mahoya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in the same situation. When someone is in the throes of an affair, he is drunk with passion for the other person (in my case it was a she). The ability to reason logically is impaired. People have affairs because some of their emotional needs are not being met within the marriage. So the best thing you can do is to discover what needs are not being met and then work to provide them to your husband. But if he refuses to stop seeing this woman, then you are going to have to ask him to leave because he is not respecting you nor your family. Having an affair is one of the most abusive and selfish things that a person can do to a spouse. It is devastating emotionally. Good luck.
2006-10-29 04:00:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move valuables and assets before approaching him. Protect yourself at all costs. Then let him know that you are aware of his infidelity. Show him your evidence. Keep copies of evidence in case it goes to the divorce stage ; you will be able to use it.
It's possible he left the proof so that you will end the relationship. If you are willing to forgive him and he is sorry and ceases all contact with the other person then you may be able to salvage what's left. It's entirely up to you.
2006-10-29 04:00:59 · answer #5 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well until he comes home then you cant sort this out. Until you know how he feels then you dont know what to do.
But can you really forgive and forget if he still wants to be with you. If not then it will eat away at the marriage. You dont say if you have children but if there are then please think about them.If you stay together and it causes an atmosphere its not fair on them.
Good luck
2006-10-29 04:01:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he left all the proof to get caught then I assume he wants OUT of the relationship and the emotional attatchment to you is now gone. I am sorry. I have been there as you are now......sucks and it hurts but you must move on for your sake. The sooner the better.
2006-10-29 03:58:35 · answer #7 · answered by MOM OF ONE 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why in the world would you want to stay with a cheating dog in heat?! It does not matter how HE feels!..... hes a dog! If i were you I'd be gone when he gets home Find an honest caring guy and leave this loser in the dust!!!
2006-10-29 04:03:29 · answer #8 · answered by MC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is cheating why do you want to stay with him? Do not say for the sake of the children because that is a bunch of bull crap. It only makes it harder on them. They do not like to see or need see or hear all of the crap. If your husband is not happy let him go and move on. If he cheated take him to court get the money you will need to take care of yourself and children comfortably and find someone who will love you and respect you.
2006-10-29 04:00:12 · answer #9 · answered by hummingbird 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him what you know and see if he is willing to work it out or if he wants to leave. Dont beg (I hate it when women do this). This will only seem like permission to him to continue. Stand strong and firm and keep your head up. Have enough self respect not to ask him what YOU did to make him do this. He was in the wrong.
2006-10-29 03:58:47 · answer #10 · answered by JC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋