How can this help or hurt the marriage?
2006-10-29 02:34:02 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I became so involved with having the children and all of their activities that I neglected my relationship with my husband around year 13. He wasn't happy & neither was I and the kids were sensitive to our moods. I realized that in that particular year that I had stopped even liking my mate and was completely overwhelmed with being a supermom and forgot that I was also a "woman". That summer my husband and I sent the kids to stay with relatives for 6 weeks. We didn't go anywhere special but spent that time learning to be friends again and not just being mommy & daddy. The first week all we did was sleep straight through the night. It was funny to us. We hadn't realized how exhausted we were. He had taken 4 weeks vacation and so that helped. Anyway, we did alot of the things we always put off because of the kids. We laughed alot. We realized that from then on that our relationship as a couple came first even before the relationship with our kids. The children have learned that mommy & daddy are also a couple and that our marriage is between us and is very important. So, first and foremost we are friends. Being lovers, confidants, and parents have just fallen into place.
This year we will be married 21 years and we haven't backslid even once.
2006-10-29 04:21:25 · answer #1 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it depends on the husband and wife. Best friends seem to talk more and openly. They respect each others feelings, they have an understanding of what and what not to say when the other is down and out. There is more of a bond there then just children . Two people can meet and fall in love and marry right away and not have the time to become best friends.. I believe that grows as with the years. But remember even best friends have disagreements and part. U get out of life what u put into it. Best friends or not. It takes 2 to make or break a marriage. Base a marriage on TRUST and LOVE not friendship.
2006-10-29 03:35:25 · answer #2 · answered by mmsbud 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no way that this can hurt and is critical to a successful marriage. There are two things that are a must in a good marriage.
1): They are the best of friends and trust each other.
2): They love each other with all their heart.
If either of these are missing the marriage will have trouble.
2006-10-29 02:43:39 · answer #3 · answered by John B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From my experience it is invaluable to have your wife as your best friend. I have been married twice. The first one ended in disaster. We weren't really friends at all..we had different interests and hobbies. My wife and I have been married now for 8 years. We are best friends. If I want to go out to a movie or go do something she's the first person that comes to mind. We'd rather spend time with one another than anyone else. That's not to say that we don't have other friends outside of eachother. We both maintain healthy male/female relationships with others. Occasionally I do go out with 'the guys' and she with 'the girls'. But at the end of the day I come home to her and she to me. Being best friends with your wife solves so many problems in a marriage.
2006-10-29 02:40:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This one is a catch 22. Yes they should be best friends, that is what a relationship is based on, but at the same time if the relationship comes to an end, you lose the best of both worlds.
2006-10-29 03:04:52 · answer #5 · answered by kandekizzez 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is absolutely essential to be best friends in a lasting marriage or atleast a lasting marriage that feels like your with your soul mate and you both have inner happiness, its just helps in a million ways even in arguments you try to treat eachother more like human beings and remember your friendship before you start name calling and you think twice before going past the point of no return in what you say and do to eachother theres more respect there, use your imagination GOOD LUCK!
2006-10-29 02:59:33 · answer #6 · answered by KIMBUR 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES YES YES, thats what makes the relationship struonger, well i ain't married but i can't see a marriage working if u ain't best friends with ur partner. u can have friends outside the relationhip of course, but without friendship in marriage why bother? i don't see being best friends in marriage harmfull
2006-10-29 02:37:55 · answer #7 · answered by DaRkAnGeL 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can't think of anyway it could hurt, but you can tell your best friend anything and they don't judge you for your mistakes. Your best friend will love you no matter what. Some can argue that, that last part isn't true, because others have lost best friends, if that's the case they obviously weren't your "best" friend.
2006-10-29 03:01:59 · answer #8 · answered by flashpro 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope the marriage is more than just a best friend relationship
has to be more to it than just being friends.
2006-10-29 02:37:57 · answer #9 · answered by apostle1938 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe that couples need to be friends first. Because if your married to someone you would even has a friend, is saying something in itself. I believe you can build a stronger relationship if you are friends.
My friends are people with good morals and values. People I can share everything with, good and bad. A shoulder to cry on. People I can share my fears and hopes with. Friends that I want to hang out with, spend time with.
How cool it is to be in love with, married to and spend the rest of your life with someone like that.
2006-10-29 02:40:39 · answer #10 · answered by Balou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋