I wondered if anyone else has this problem.... when my husband and I were first dating we would do everything together, we read books, played card/board games, played xbox, went on walks... now he doesn't want to do anything with me. When he is home all he does it spend his time on the computer or in front of the TV, he ignores me and the kids.
He says he hates playing card games and board games, and he only did that before because he wanted to make me happy.... so now we don't do anything together except watch TV and sleep..
Anyone else have a husband who doesn't like to do anything they do? What do you do? I feel like I'm loosing my husband.... I thought I married someone who would play with me and my kids, not sit on his butt in front of the TV all the time.....
Help!!!!
2006-10-29 01:58:59 · 25 answers · asked by mrs. ruspee 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sounds like he's become complacent which just means he's gotten comfortable and is taking things for granted and your marriage has fallen into a rut. You need to change your pattern of doing things, do something to trigger the natural curiosity in him that we all have.....change some things that he has started to take for granted, make him persue you again, stop being so readily available to him, make him a little jealous...I SAID A LITTLE don't go to the point where he will be convinced forever that your having an affair. Men hate to be ignored, and your constantly trying to get him to pay attention to you has gotten old for him....men are natural hunters so make him hunt you down so to speak....this is in case you can't afford a marraige counselor or don't have insurance that will pay for it....I hope I helped. Good Luck!
2006-10-29 01:25:31 · answer #1 · answered by jupitor 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him and tell him how you feel. If that doesn't work try counseling. Men have a tendency to still believe certain things are women's work. In 2006 we know better. It takes two people to make it work. If you really love him don't give up. Opposites do attract. Find something you both enjoy and also spend some time alone without the kids. Make a date one night a week and find a babysitter for the children. Rekindle the love. Don't give up.
2006-10-29 09:34:09 · answer #2 · answered by rose v 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh poor thing. Bad, bad husband. Well, the husband's perspective in 99% of cases levy a pretty stiff accusation against their wives. Number 1 on the list is no more sex. Constant nagging like a dripping faucet is somewhere in that list. Whenever a man stops desiring to be with his wife, it is because he is happier that way.
If you want your husband to want to be with you, and you are in that 99 percentile, then make it so he wants to be with you. Get over having to "feel" you have to be in the mood for intimacy. Some things you do because it is right. Do it because it is the right thing not to defraud your husband. That is a start, a good start.
2006-10-29 10:20:16 · answer #3 · answered by pshdsa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that only shows you married someone you don't know very well. that is the result of the saying, "putting your best foot forward"... you become a different person to a girlfriend or boyfriend. you did a lot of things together and you had fun, right? but it seems, it was all a lie, coz after all the time you had doing these things, HE WAS NOT REALLY ENJOYING AT ALL!!
but that is all in the past. now, with 3 kids, the both of you really need counselling.
good luck!
2006-10-29 10:20:37 · answer #4 · answered by Ross 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your message conveys that your married life has lost the fizz which was there before the marriage. Dont worry you are not teh only one in the world who are suffering from it. It is generic. The reasons can be plenty. Some of them being: Love life has dried up - try to spice it up, Children are taking lot of time - Cant do anything about it, Your hubby is worried about your and your family' future and puts in lot of work in office and when he comes back he is tired to do anything which is physical including sex may be. Note that these things were not there when you were dating. Try to get things back to being spicy like before marriage. Be on his side and relieve him! talk to him direct like a friend while you were dating! Write or add me if you need to talk, bh37bh37@yahoo.com
x
tom
2006-10-29 09:34:51 · answer #5 · answered by bh37bh37 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's doing more at work than what he used to or maybe he's just tired all the time. Try and see if there is anything different from when the two of you started dating. Perhaps a few lifestyle changes could make a difference.
2006-10-29 09:07:05 · answer #6 · answered by Ben R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have this same problem, only were not married and my BF(of 2 years) sits in front of the computer all of the time. so i tried to tell him how i was feeling and that didnt work. i used the kids, like the kids want to go to the park with you and i. and that seemed to work. best of luck.
2006-10-29 09:02:57 · answer #7 · answered by blondie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should ask your husband what he likes to do, try to do something he likes with him, instead of having him doing stuff that you like all the time. Maybe that way you might find something in common. Married couples have their similarities and differences, you have to work out the differences, and compromise. In a marriage it's give and take, sometimes you give more than you receive, or vise versa. I hope you can work it out with him, good luck.
2006-10-29 09:04:33 · answer #8 · answered by superboredom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been married? Seems like this happens in a marriage..it can't be helped. The problem is men expect women to take care of this problem..they do nothing aobut it. If you want this marriage to work, you will have to put in the effort. Such is life.
2006-10-29 09:02:26 · answer #9 · answered by Silli_Babe 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to find something you both interested in maybe if you would part take in things he likes he would do the same for you . How about a dance course for the 2 of you ? Maybe he has some deeper problems . have him check with a doctor , maybe it's only a vitamin deficiency
2006-10-29 09:02:24 · answer #10 · answered by silverearth1 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋