why do people disagree with young mums?

Answer 1

People disagree with everyone. Don't feel singled out.

Answer 2

I think you mean why do people disagree with young women becoming mums? I think the main reason is they feel that a teenager hasn't had time to experience enough of life without the responsibilities of parenthood, plus she may find financing the upbringing difficult. With this in mind, perhaps the young Mum may become restless with the constraints that bringing up a child brings with it, and in time both she and the child will suffer. Not all people disagree with the idea though and not all young mums are the same; a lot love being mothers, give their children lots of love and do a very good job.

Answer 3

I just think that its societies way and faults. Young mums were all there were once, I think that the main problem people have is that they are not married to the dad, not that they are a young mums.

I dont know about young mums being imature or not having the skills to bring up children, i think its more older people that should just accept peole for what they are and not judge them just because they are young.

I was a young mum at 18 and had to leave college but now i have 3 children and 4th on the way all of which i love and are doing well in all aspect of life.
I am a ICT tutor and get paid enough to give them what they need.

Answer 4

I dont think it is so much about disagreeing, it just seems a shame when there is so much out there in the big wide world to experience and so much to learn, and young mums will probably never get the chance to live these life experiences. I do not agree though that all young mums are bad, or that all older mums are good. It just maybe rather limiting.

Answer 5

It's kind of amusing if you think about it, because people have no problem criticizing teenage mothers and stating they're so immature an what not, but really if they were never a teen mom.. How do they know? How can they judge? That being said they really can't. True there are teen moms that make ALL teen moms look bad, but why should the rest of us be judged because of someone else's foul up... I got pregnant at 16 had him at 17 & am fixing to turn 18 and I have a beautiful 8 month old that I Love More than some of these ignorant judgemental people could ever begin to fathom. As for people commenting that they miss out on there lives... HOW? Having a child, even being a teen mom, your life as just begun! Assuming you are a teen mom... Dont worry what others think, It's NONE of their business!

Answer 6

you can miss out on a lot and it can make your future a lot more uncertain, having said that, i was a mum at 16 (now 24) i have worked since i had my little one, he is always clean, well dressed and polite, i own my own house and provide for him without any help from the state. We're not all bad there are just some young parents that make the rest of us look like money grabbing, council house snatching chavs. You very rarely hear the success stories, normally just the "failures". So i'd like to think its not that people disagree more that we can be painted in a bad light.

Answer 7

I agree slightly with 'Kaorin', some young mums can handle the situation very well, but they are the ones who give up the stuff associated with youth, like going out drinking with your mates, hanging out on street corners. In fact they grow up very quickly themselves. Other young mums want to stay out with their friends AND look after a child, some just have children to keep their boyfriend and some just so they can access housing, these mums are just immature. I've known older mums who have had babies and not been able to cope. But older women with families of their own, know what must be sacrificed to do the best for your children, they feel sad that the young mothers are loosing part of their own youth.

Answer 8

Parenting starts long before a child is even conceived, when it comes to young mothers [teen and pre-teen] then we are looking at people who are children themselves so not capable of the adult job of taking care of children.

Teens and pre-teens have sex because they are irresponsible and do not understand the consequences of sex; if a person is immature or uneducated then they have no place raising a child. Underage sex puts the girl at greater risk of STD's and cervical cancer. Underage pregnancy is a bigger risk because her body is not fully developed and as such it may not be as well equipped to deal with pregnancy and child birth thus putting the child's life at risk as well as the mothers – putting the child at risk before it is even born – miscarriage tends to be very high amongst teenagers because simply their bodies cannot deal with pregnancy.

Children raising children is like the blind leading the blind, they do not have the same life experience as adults, often if having sex and getting pregnant it means they are either not educated about the basics of sex/anatomy or they have purposefully put themselves at risk for one reason or another. A child deserves to grow up, attend school, have a normal social life, having a child prevents that to a large degree and parents may not do as well as they could or become resentful so not able to provide the utmost care for their child's well-being.

Also finance is an issue as well, young mothers more often than not are not financially stable so cannot give a child all they need and want, not only is that an issue within the family but it is also a social problem – young mothers get benefits, they often get put on the top of lists for counsel homes, this means the tax payers are paying for their irresponsibility and other people are having to miss out on homes and benefits as the young mothers are getting all these advantages.

If a person cannot take care of themselves, or put their child's health and well-being at risk from the start, then they should not be having children – yes some young parents do a good job, but that does not change the situation, they could have done a much better job by waiting until they were old enough.

I have three friends who are young mothers, one of which purposefully got herself knocked up, none of which were planned, all of them have a house and get a load of benefits – I however am homeless and in huge amounts of debt, if I had gotten myself pregnant I would not have to worry as much about these things. That factor alone breeds resentment, but the rest in terms of responsibility is simply issues where mother and child are at risk from this issue.

Answer 9

I can't understand what exactly you want to know, so I am going to assume. If you are asking why do we disagree that young women should become mothers then that is because it is just too hard to do as a teenager, it really is. Children try the patience of saints and teenagers just haven't developed the patience it needs to govern children. Now if you are asking why do people disagree with what young mothers do, well, that is just a time honored mother versus mother thing. We all think we do it so much better than anyone else and want to pass on our knowledge to the younger generation, it is just how it is.

Answer 10

I was a young mum - well, 21. I wasn't emotionally ready to have a child. I needed love and thought my child would give it to me. Unfortunately I came from a bad background and so had very limited parenting skills. I wasn't financially stable, nor was my relationship good enough to have a child in. My husband walked out leaving me with a toddler and a baby. Life was very hard.
I became a mother the second time around at 33. It was very different. My husband adores his girls, we're better off and can afford to give them a better life. I'm more patient and wiser. I have much more life experience to offer this time around and my children benefit.
I would not want my daughters to be young mothers. Why? Because I think that every child deserves a better life and an uneducated, poor girl isn't an ideal parent.
Every child on this planet deserves two loving, kind parents who can provide a secure home.
And it is nonsense to say that young mothers have more energy as a reason to justify it. It is what is best for the child that counts.
When you have a child, your life is dedicated to that child. And that's the way it should be.

Answer 11

Everyone likes to hate on everyone else for whatever they are doing. There is a great stigma attached to young moms. Not all of us set out to have a baby so young and give up our lives but i believe that if someone can slip and get pregnant my accident, it takes more to have the baby and stand by your responsibility than to run to the abortion clinic (i know everyone doesn't see it that way)

I had my son 2 months before my 18th birthday, he is a sickly child and i find things hard sometime but that is no different to how a mom of any age would feel, i think if anything younger moms make better parents in dfiferent ways because although we may not have as much life experience as other moms and may not have been round the world on a cruise ship we can do more with our children and will be closer to them because there is not such a generation gap between us.

Alot of people think that young moms think that having babies is the easy way out and that they can just happily live on benefits and get a council house and sit on our arses doing nothing and some do but when they are left holding the baby they soon realise its not as much fun as its cracked up to be. I know that there are people like that but, i personally had to fight for the right for a property for myself and my son - living in a mother and baby unit and proving that i was capable of looking after him.
Also having a baby isn't all fun and games, you can't just sit there day after day and think things will just get done for you because the world doesn't work like that.

I am now in university full time and studying to better myself and my life so that i can give my son more and there are more and more young parents doing that.
Obviously i dont think that it is right for school kids to have babies because i think there should be more emphasise on the danger of underage sex. But you can't judge a book just because of its age