Someone plz say you agree! Lol?

Question

Ok I do not want to sound like a horrible mother but here is the thing.. I just had my first child 3 weeks ago..I currently stay at home while in the process of looking for a job plus I would like to be at home with the baby since he was just born while my husband goes to work. I am just getting so stressed because at times which is not very often but when it does happen its stressfull he is VERY fussy and does nothing but cry I do everything I can and still he crys but will stop and then cry again. This does not happen often hes actually a good baby. Anyways I just get so angry at myself because I feel as if I am not doing anything right or something because he just continues to cry. Not only that..at night when he wakes up every 3-4 hours for feedings my husband does that and changes him if needed. I usually stay asleep but at times I will also help,my husband says I need to help also..wasnt 9 months and during the days he works enough? Does anyone agree? I mean arent nights my break

Answer 1

I can see your point, but he does work. So can't you try to comprimise. I know you're stressed to the max, but I promise, it will get better hun. Good luck!!

Answer 2

I can totally relate to your question. I am a stay at home mom and the first few months are rough. Your job is demanding and tiring. You do deserve a break and some alone time.

With that being said you need to come up with a compromise with your husband about the care of your infant.

When he comes hom let him pee, get comfortable, and unwind for a few minutes and then gently ask him if he can take the baby for awhile while you go for a walk, take a bath or do whatever it is that you want. You will feel so much better by getting some alone time and will feel better when you take over the nights. While your husband works during the day so do you but you can also sleep when your baby sleeps. Something your husband cannot do.

As far as your baby crying for no reason, some babies are just more fussy and you definately deserve a break from that!!! Do not feel bad about your baby crying. If you have a sling carry your baby around as much as possible. It usually helps!!!

Good Luck to you!

Answer 3

It is your responsibility as a mother to take care of your child... Your husband is working at daytime plus there are times that he cant sleep either because the baby is crying...Just be thankful that he helps you in some ways.

Your baby feel something what you feel, dont let him to feel you fear, your anger, your depression..because he can feel that..He is crying because he feel something wrong, maybe he has gas or anything.. You must know the different ways how he cried, you should be able to tell because you are with him all the time. I know it is frustrating sometimes but it is part of being a mother.. Once he become 2 months and you have established a good sleeping pattern for him, everything will be okay... He will sleep like a big person at night, just only you have to wake up once to change his diaper and feed him a little bit..

Enjoy your baby while she/he is young..once they get older you will wish that they are still a baby where you can cuddle him all the time.

I am a mother also, My baby is 3 and half month old now.. I go back to work after 40 days of giving birth to him..

Answer 4

No point resenting your husband for not helping at times. It won't make him help. Maybe you should get up at night since you currently can sleep during the day while the baby sleeps. Either way, you'll be the one doing it 24 hours a day if you push the issue too hard and end up divorced. Babies cry for no reason sometimes so put the baby in the crib for 15 min and take a break-enjoy a shower by yourself. It isn't your fault every time the baby cries. They can't express themselves any other way and sometimes we all need a good cry so if all the babies needs are met put it somewhere safe and get your 10-15minute break. Also, try soothing music for yourself. Whatever you like, the baby may like it also. Maybe you should discuss not looking for work and being a stay at home mother with your husband and you being the one to get up at night? I don't know your situation and there is no perfect answer. But the first few months are hard and stressful for everyone involved. Plus your hormones and still wacked out so that needs time to level out too. But marriage is very hard during this time as you are learning but remember your husband was with you first and you two need to stay married too! Drink some hot (decaf) tea and try to enjoy your son as this time shall soon pass.

Answer 5

Maybe you and your husband could take turns. That is what my husband and I did and it worked. You could sleep through the first feeding and then do the next. That way he can get teh sleep he needs and so can you. A baby is a lot of work, but trust that it is sooo worth it! And the days of your baby sleeping through the night will come soon enough. Just try and get rest during the day when your baby naps. Good luck!

Answer 6

first off, your newborn can sense when your upset..if you have family around like mom or mother-in-law, see if they could come over for a couple of hours so you can get some rest or get out of the house..you need your time to yourself..if not your gonna get what they call postpartum depression..your baby might just have an upset stomach..do you use a passy? if not, try that..your husband is just being a man..both of you helping out together in the night is a good idea..that way there is none of "well i get up with the baby every night while he/she is always sleeping"..it's something you do together..good luck, and everything will be ok..welcome to motherhood my dear

Answer 7

Having a baby is one of the biggest shocks to both your body and mind. Your body chemistry is out of balance, you are sleep deprived and exhausted, and may be suffering from postpartum depression. I know - I went through this with both my babies.

It helped me a lot to have my babies in my bed so I didn't have to get up to breastfeed. And trust me, they eventually sleep in their own bed.

If your husband works full time and you stay home, you need to let him sleep at night and you take naps during the day when the baby is napping. I know it's really hard, but I promise it will get better.

It will help a lot if you can put the baby in a stroller and walk EVERY DAY. This will help alleviate your stress/anxiety, improve your outlook and mood, and let you sleep more soundly (when you get to).

Get help from as many friends and family members that you can, and take the best care of yourself that you can. If your stress (depression) doesn't improve in a few weeks, talk to your doctor.

Best of luck getting through this really hard time - and know you are not alone!

Answer 8

No, and I'll tell you why.....You are that babies Mother and while you are at home and not working, you need to do the caring...Not your husband. He works and needs the break....Don't think you're going to get any break anytime soon....You have many many years of this. Now, when you both are working outside the home, than you both share the baby caring and switch off and on for breaks. It's tough but does get a little better. Just have patience don't get angry, you will learn what all of his cries are for....Good luck....Rest when baby does.

Answer 9

Yes, you do need a break from baby all day. My sister is the same way with my niece. About the crying, I know how it feels to have one that seems to want to cry and cry and nothing you do works. The main thing is to calm down, he can sense that you are stressed and agitated...trust me, take some breaths..walk to another room for another minute and get your bearing back. Go back to baby and talk and hold him and he will be fine. Good luck

Answer 10

Well, you have to remember that your husband has to get up in the morning and go to work to. You don't want him to lose his job being that he's the breadwinner right now.

Have you checked your baby for reflux? If he arches his back when he's crying, that can signify that his esophagus is burning. Also, colic causes babies to cry. And, then there is gas.

Make sure that you burp your baby lots after feedings. Actually, you should stop after each ounce to burp.

Little Tummies Gas Relief works great.

Best of luck.

Answer 11

I would say .... yes. If you take care of the baby all day long, your husband should take care of the baby at night. BUT, I can see your husbands point of view too. He feels like he works all day, has to come home, take care of the baby while he should be sleeping in order to rest up for tomorrows work day.