My husband has a friend that's a girl and it's fine for him to talk to her, but had me stop talking to my guy friends, he don't understands how i feel about that. So i'm looking to make him understand that point. Don't have any guy friends anymore. any help would be great!!
2006-10-28 16:37:44 · 16 answers · asked by carmen b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He doesn't have the right to tell you who you can be friends with. It's showing that by not letting you speak with other guys, he is insecure and doesn't trust you. Go out, have fun, and if he continually demands that you don't have any male friends, it may be time that you either lay on the guilt trip, or if you want to continue that, just get a gay best friend and have him hit on your hubby instead. =O
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2006-10-28 16:44:28 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. Maul 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, double standards are wrong. It appears to me that you don't trust your wife. Is the reason for this that you're scared she'll do to her male friends what you'd like to do to your female friend. Or is it you just plain don't trust your wife? Can someone say insecure boys and girls? I knew ya could. I am divorced now for other reasons, but when I married my ex, she had a male friend that was around long before me. There was nothing there, but as a guy, I felt challenged. Not to get holy roller here, but I asked God to help me with that feeling and He did. The guy was just a friend. So dude listen up...lighten up on your ol' lady. Unless you have something to hide.
Now to play devil's advocate....to the girl goes this question: How promiscuous were you before you married your husband and did he know it? Had to ask because not knowing the whole story, one has to guess at the whole picture. If you were a, uh, friendly person with the guys, then he can't help the way he feels. Even tho you've changed your ways and married him and love him..etc. There again, if he was a pound hound, you should be suspicious.
2006-10-28 16:57:03 · answer #2 · answered by unclewill67 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hi again, so I was right it is about this other woman, or as you put it "Girl".
I think he understands your point very well.
I wonder though, if you don't understand something about him?
HE DOESN"T CARE!
He cheated on you once before, & he got caught, but he didn't suffer any consequence did he? He can cheat on you, because you LET HIM. Oh sure, you squawk about it, but he still gets a hot meal, & a place to put his feet up, & someone to take care of the kids, so why worry?
You know, I have female friends besides my wife too, but I don't go to dinner with them, they come to dinner with me & my wife.
I hide NOTHING from her. If I've been talking to one of my female friends then my wife gets an update on how the friend is doing in the same way I would about anybody else. My business is OUR BUSINESS.
I think your husband is trying to groom this latest girlfriend for a clandestine affair. He's keeping you off balance by trying to fool you into thinking he is being transparent about his contact with her, but the big tip-off that he's up to something is a) making dates with her that exclude you, & b) continuing his contact with her like he's got a clean record with you, & despite your bruised emotions.
I still think that if you want your husband to get your point, then kick him to the curb. Actions speak louder than words. His actions say, he feels he can do what he wants without considering your feelings. So what action do you want to take that will make your point that he can't get away with that?
2006-10-28 16:57:51 · answer #3 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A person needs friends of both male and female simply the get views from both sides of any topic. Somethines you can talk more comfortable with the opp sex. I'll ask my lady friends what they think about a gift I was thinking about getting my wife for her birthday for example. I know my wife has male friends and we both have strong trust in our relationship to not feel uncomfortable with this. All in all it is normal to have friends...male and female. This may not have helped you much but I hope it did.
PS I am a male...and we talked (sort of..lol ). and no harm was done. Have a great day my friend.
2006-10-29 01:02:33 · answer #4 · answered by R W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Carmen,
your husband has a problem,not only is he insecure and selfish,he is also a Dictator.Toss hem,you can do better,and you will be able to have lots of male Friend,I volunteer,Good Luck.
2006-10-28 22:36:35 · answer #5 · answered by karl s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He knows all guys want to have sex with every women they see or know. He knows this guy wants to get the booty, so he is blocking. Your husband want s the booty from this women friend, I suggest you give it up more to keep his mind occupied with how good he has it and not how good he could have it with this other women. Or just start sleeping with your male friends on the side (sancho) and keep it on the sneak. He won't see or hear you talking with them so he will never see or hear you sleeping with them....
2006-10-28 16:43:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, Hubby ! Did you marry that lady because you love her ? Or just to jerk her around ? Get real, your supposed to spend your lives together, both of you ! When the preacher said ''Son/Daughter, do you take this Man/Woman to be your lawfully wedded Husband/Wife to honor, cherish, in sickness and in health, for richer and poorer, happy and in saddness for as long as you shall live?'' (Answer) I DO ! I DO ! And you two sealed it with a kiss..........
think about it !
2006-10-28 17:05:53 · answer #7 · answered by Steven H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is insecure he needs his lady friends to build his confidence..but he is afraid of the competion and thinks you may find something better..what he dont realise is he can stop you from talking BUT he cant stop you from fantising about another man..in all reality you can think how good someone else is and he will never know so dont ever admit it no matter what..look at all the hansom men out there and lick your lips cause they are licking theirs when they look at you..he feels he is not satisfying you and he knows you are afraid to tell him....had you rather have this - or this /
2006-10-28 16:54:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
How effeminate is he?
Perhaps he is gay.
If not he is or will be fooling around on you.
Men do not like to here the sentence, " Lets just be friends".
Your guy friends had ulterior motives also.
Perhaps neither of you are ready for marriage.
2006-10-28 16:44:34 · answer #9 · answered by Alex Freaking Trebek 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It goes both ways man, if she can't talk to her guy friends, you really shouldn't talk to your girl friends or she might think you're a hypocrit.
2006-10-28 16:38:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋