I'm of the belief that if your home has more culture and religious practices in it, that teenagers will be too busy playing the piano, horseback riding, studying foreign languages, to even think about it, let alone want it. My daughter says I'm naive, and my 16 yr old g'daughter has a boyfriend who "lays" with her in her bedroom, right under my daughter's nose...and she says she HAS to allow it, or else they will find another way. I just don't believe this way has to be ... at all. What do you all think?
Am I being 'stuffy' and naive? Of course I wouldn't opinionize to her or them, but I just want to know what the more of society thinks, so I'm putting it up to the group here to tell me what society is about in 2006.
2006-10-28 16:16:07 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Laying with girls is nice.. i like laying with my girlfriend because its comfortable and i love her i feel better holding her close. its not always sexual....
but yes. teen sex is popular. and no matter how busy you are there is always time to do it.
except my sister horseback rides seriously every day and dosent have time for anything else on top of her homework....so i dont know....
2006-10-28 16:19:26 · answer #1 · answered by Fernesta 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If find that a majority of the time, the more uptight the parents are about things the more likely the children do it.
If you take my family as an example, my parents are by far the most laid back in the family. I'm 17, and haven't so much as even dated yet, I don't really see a need for it, and I'm waiting for a commited relationship to have sex.
On the other hand, my aunt and uncle who are the most uptight, have two daughters my age. One's a year older, and she started having sex back in highschool, and know for a fact she does with her current boyfriend, and smokes pot as well. Then her sister, who's my age, has serious psychological problems because of her weight, and I wouldn't be surprised if she told me she's having sex.
Maybe I'm wrong, but in my personal opinion, anytime you tell a human being they can't do something, they want to that much more. However, if you let them do whatever it is, they realise it's not all that great and take it easy. Sorta like how it's mostly college age people that you see drinking WAY too much, because now that they can, they want to make up for lost time.
2006-10-28 16:33:18 · answer #2 · answered by MysticTortoise 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes most teenagers are having sex and using profanity. It's sad but the only thing people can do is try to make their households a place where it is unacceptable and hope there children will make good choices in life. Kids will always say "well so and so is doing it so why can't I" it goes hand in hand with immaturity. Her mom doesn't have to allow it. If her daughter wants to sneak around behind her mothers back that's a personal choice but your daughter does not have to condone it. Then again, I don't think much harm will come from them lying on a bed together as long as the door is open. The girl is 16, I think she can handle it.
2006-10-28 18:01:41 · answer #3 · answered by philio8008 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, not all teenagers today have sex and use profanity. My oldest son is 15 and he understands the bad consequences of having sex before marriage, especially unprotected sex. I believe that it is the parents responsibility to be a parent and put a stop to some of the things teenagers are doing now. I see some kids that wouldn't survive in my household simply because I'd jack their jaw if they back sassed me. I grew up knowing what "the woodshed" meant and knew just how much a hickory switch stung. We didn't talk back to our parents and never would have even thought of having a boy in our room PERIOD! Now it seems like parents are afraid of raising their children right, or just too busy to care. If I were you, I'd straighten my daughter and then my grand daughter out. Your daughter doesn't HAVE to allow it, it's her house and her rules and your grand daughter should abide by those. And if the grand daughter doesn't like it....then tough love. When I was growing up I really resented the fact that my parents were so strict, now looking back, I'm grateful. My only regret is that I didn't thank my parents enough!
2006-10-28 16:27:58 · answer #4 · answered by lilbitadevil 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No matter how much religion or culture your home has, kids are still going to be kids. They are curious, and curiousity is not a sin. It is also true that most kids today are having sex at a younger age. By making sex seem dirty or unacceptable in your home is just going to make them want to do it more. Your daughter does not have to allow it, but if she doesn't, it will just drive her daughter farther away. Communication is best. Talk to your kids and make sure they know all the risks and rewards of sex. Overall, get off the cross, somebody needs the wood.
2006-10-28 16:21:21 · answer #5 · answered by derekk07 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you're being stuffy and naive..but I think maybe your daughter is right...it IS a different world out there....young teenagers are having sex all the time...and from what I understand they don't even consider oral sex or manual sex to be real sex....frightening thoughts--I know it makes me sound middle aged (which I am) but I'm not too sure how emotional maturity is tied to sexual maturity..can these kids handle the emotions of sex? I dunno...I certainly couldn't have at that age...One thing is certain and we all know this...that kids will always think about sex just about all of the time.(I wish I had some of those hormones back!LOL).
2006-10-28 17:17:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel it is important to really know each person (teenager) involved. Too many times people make assumptions with little or no facts. I know it is entirely possible to just be in male company and truly nothing of sexual nature happened. Sex is not as important to all as one would think. Comfort is however. If people are next to each other it does not always mean it will go to the next level. People these days are very concerned about the diseases and other issues that are so very often talked about. The comment your daughter made about you having to allow it or there will be another way....Well....I feel it is good that she is being supervised in some way. Yet when it comes to sex when it happens it just happens.....People should be made to feel good about themselves. As well as their new relationships. We all had to learn. Why fill it with complexes?
2006-10-28 16:44:17 · answer #7 · answered by rosezealous 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A great many teenagers do have sex and use profanity, but not all. It can often depend on how they are raised and what kind of social environment they are exposed to. I grew up with old-school parents, as a teenager I was not allowed to use profanity at home under threat of dire punishment.
Your daughter does not "have" to allow her daughter to have sex under her nose, it's obviously her choice to do so, and I certainly hope that your granddaughter is on birth control!
2006-10-28 16:20:39 · answer #8 · answered by Blue Jean 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
teenagers weather controlled or not
have been having sex earlier and earlier
we just have to make sure hey understand safety and you trust them and have the understanding of the child to ask for help
my seven year old sister asked me a very grown up question
that i can not repeat here as for the community guidelines
but in the old school saying she has gone to first base a few times before already
she lives in a very small town of a few hundred people
so imagine the big city's kids do
at last my sister has a brother and understanding parents
to turn to and ask these questions
2006-10-28 16:36:36 · answer #9 · answered by Zara3 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't call it being naive...maybe hopeful? I didn't lose my virginity till I was 18. I recently learned that my brother lost his at 18 too. I think most responsible teenagers wait until 18 and up (hardly anyone waits till marriage anymore), but how many responsible teenagers do you know? Most are just way too impatient to grow up.
2006-10-28 16:23:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋