I'm 17 and Pregnant for the 2nd time... should i keep it??? what should i do??? HELP!!!?

Question

i have an 8month old daughter and im pregnant once again... i certainly didnt plan on it, it just happened. me and my babydaddy are going thru really rough times in our relationship right now and both of our families will be so upset and disappointed that we let this happen again. BUT im against abortions BUT its also hard enough already with just one kid ya know... your answers are highly appreciated **ONLY SERIOUS ANSWERS PLEASE**

ADOPTION IS NOT AN OPTION PEOPLE!!! THIS IS THE WAY I SEE IT: IF IMMA CARRY IT AND GO THRU THE PAIN AND GET ATTACHED TO IT THEN IM STEPPING UP AND KEEPING IT!

I'VE BEEN LIVING WITH MY BABYDADDY FOR THE PAST 2YRS SO PARENTS DONT PLAY A ROLE IN THIS PICTURE!

**NO RUDENESS!!! I'M GOING THRU AN EXTREMELY HARD TIME AND I DONT NEED ASSHOLES RESPONDING TO MY QUESTION AND BRING ME DOWN**

Answer 1

You should start a circus staring those two kids, you, and those 6 or 7 guys you had sex without protection with. You could make money and wear those skimpy skirts you have obvoiusly grown to love, now go have some babies,

Editx2

1. the more babies you have the bigger your circus

2. all those workers, free of cost

now take me seriuoly

oh yes, I like your idea of getting an account on yahoo, just to ask a question, like steven hawking did

Answer 2

Since you are against abortion do NOT have one! It could cause you to feel unimaginable guilt the rest of your life. Try to get some counseling for you and your baby's daddy. It could really help. You both need to think of the daughter you have together. Relationships aren't easy and require both people to work at them. Both of you should try to remember why you love each other and look for the good in each other. Take time to work on your relationship. Talking about how you feel without getting defensive with each other will help you know what the other is feeling. Listening to each other is IMPORTANT. As for the pregnancy: if you both agree you might consider adoption. If that is out of the question you both need to start planning how your already strained relationship is going to survive the stress of a pregnacy and another child. Considering what you have posted I would seriously consider the adoption option. You can choose the adoptive parents and choose to have a closed adoption or an open adoption. You could also let someone else (agency or relative) choose the adoptiive parents for you if you don't want to do so yourself. You should also speak with your doctor about some more reliable birth control methods once you have this baby. Good luck sweetie. You have some difficult decisions and a hard road a head no matter what you decide.

Answer 3

You need to weigh the pros and cons of keeping this child.
Do you have the means to support another child? Are you working? Are you able to take care of yourself and the child you already have? What kind of life can you offer this child? These are serious things that you need to think about. If you and the father are having rough times now a new baby is not going to make it any easier. You already know how much attention, time, love, etc that babies require.

You have to let both families aware since this child will also be the grandchild if you intend to keep the child or put it up for adoption. Do not expect them to support you financially nor get angry with them. You need to take responsibility and find away to decide what is best for the child.
As for the boyfriend, is he working? If not, he needs to find a job and contribute as well. Both parents need to support the child not just one.
Please seek counseling so that you and him will be able to work out your issues for the sake of the child you already have.

I don't believe that when you say "it just happened" It could have been prevented but it's too late now. This is what you have to do to help yourself in the future: do not have sex again until you are ready to deal with the possible consequences: pregnancy, std's, etc.. . If not having sex is an option: go on the pill (take it religiously), use condoms (protect yourself against most stds as well), ask planned parenthood or your doctor about the other forms of birth control.

Answer 4

Keep the baby whatever you do! My advice to you may not be anything you willing to listen to, but I hope you do because it will help. I'm not going to lecture to you how you shouldn't have had sex in the first place to have the baby because I'm sure you've had enough of that already. If you did do adoption I think you'd be heartbroke then again it really depends on what is best for child. Before you think that there is no way you can not have it put up for adoption think about looking into a church, a good one (I'd try to find a non-denominational church that supports finance of young pregnancies). And as for you and you boy friend looking to come together I would say look into the Bible or even ask a pastor to help find what you need on relationship advice. Believe it or not but the Bible does contain many things to advice people in a relationship AND IT WORKS! I mean that is one reason why God had that in there is so that you can see he does care about you and he doesn't want you hurt all the time.

Answer 5

No one can answer this question for you. I can tell you it needs to be a decision that is thought out completely. I also do not believe in abortion. There is always adoption. There are plently of families who can not have children but want to. Please do not do this alone. Talk to your family. It may have been a mistake getting pregnant but it has already been done. Your will need your family no matter what decision you will make. Remember that the decision is one you have to live with no matter if you decide to keep the baby, put the baby up for adoption, or terminate the prenancy. Also consider what is best for the child. This baby is completely innocent in this and keep in mind what would be best for the child. Please talk to your family and do not do this alone. No need worry about what happened just learn from your mistake so that this is the last time you have to make a decision like this. Make this the end of bad judements and the start of a new begining. Do absolutely everything you can do to better yourself (like school) to provide your daughter and if you decide this new baby the life you all deserve. You are young and even with a child there is nothing you can not accomplish. My thoughts and prayers are with you in this difficult decision you are faced with.

Answer 6

At 17 I was out having fun with friends, thinking about life beyond high school and working. I couldn't have imagined having sex let alone a kid at that age.

You need to do what you need to do. Personally, even though you are obviously very careless and irresponsible when it comes to sex, having another kid at your age is ludicrous. I would have an abortion (if it isn't too late) and LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES. Go on birth control OR abstain from sex until you can be mature enough to handle it.

Multiply your headaches, lack of finances AND the work it takes to be a parent by two fold and think about whether or not you can handle it. Also think about the terrible relationship you are currently in. Does bringing another child into the world help your situation? Probably not.

Answer 7

"should i keep it???"

Then you say that adoption is not an option and you don't believe in abortion.

Therefore, don't ask a question if you dont want those two options in everyone's answers.

If tough times were going in relationship, you two should of focused on repairing the relationship. Not continuing to sleep with eachother with unstable relationship for potential pregnancy to come again.

Now that you are pregnant, it can make matters abit more difficult with having two children in diapers.

When you have sex, you two planned on knowing there can be a pregnancy. Nothing just "happens". Even with prevention, it can happen. No exscuse.

To go through the pregnancy and pain is still no exscuse to be selfish to keep a child just because you went through that. That doesn't declare you two to be ready for a second baby just because you went through the pregnancy.

Either you two are able to have a second baby or you two are not able to. Simple as that!

Either adoption, abortion or keeping. Either way, you both need to step up and look at ALL your options and weigh pro and con. Leave your feelings out of it as your feelings don't matter anymore. Your 8 month old and this unborn child's feelings are top priority. Just because you went through labor doesn't mean this child should go through a life of proverty as you two can't properly provide for his or her needs, along with the 8 month old.

Answer 8

This answer has no disrespect intended, but there is some information missing here. I was a parent at a young age. It is hard and doesn't get easier. I do not believe in abortion, but being a man, I cannot make that choice for you. My wife believes the same way. However, as hard as it has been, our daughter is the light of our lives. I would like to know if protection was being used...just curious.

I urge you, if you do not want to keep the child, to seriously consider adoption. I have many friends who were not able to have children and it has changed their lives being able to adopt a child and give him/her all of the love they could possibly imagine. Life at any stage is precious and the child doesn't have a choice, so please try and make the best choice for the child and you.

Answer 9

Ok, your between a rock and a hard place aren't you?! Well my advice is that if you don't believe in abortion & dont want to put the baby up for adoption then you kep it. After all it is your child and you are going to go through nine months of pregnancy then you have every right to keep it and want to keep it. Do you and or your boyfriend have good jobs?Is it going ot be alittle harder to keep this child and support it? Maybe but soem people that have more than one kid say its not half as hard as they thought it would be. Just think your kids will be around the same age so they can be really close and play together! and you and your husband or boyfriend or whatever will be so blessed to have another little precious baby. So keep it, i think you really know that you want to but your just scared and worried and questioning yourself. I'm sure you are a great mother and now your gonna have another little angelt o love! It will all turn out fine. If your family is disappointed then well they have a right o their opinion but its your life not theirs, remember that, so just have your beautiful baby! I'm sure once your family sees teh first ultra sound or see the little babys face at birth they will love it so much and be so happy and proud, but if they aren't then don't let tehm bring you down!Good Luck and I'm sure everythihg will turn out just fine. Now go grab a baby name book and look for some names! :) I'm sure you willd o great!! And if your having problems in your marriage address them with a consulor or just with each other. Always try to communicate will with your husband or boyfriend or whatever he is! You want the baby then you have it!! :)

Answer 10

17 and pregnant, again! Geez, honey... You are certainly making things very hard on yourself, but I take it you know that!
Adoption, abortion, and keeping the baby would be the options here.
Get out your pen and paper and for the next couple days write the cons to each one... the work on the pros.
Any choice is probably not one you will necessarily be happy with, but you need to think of the best interest of the child, how baby will be affect, how you will be affected,your finanical situation,then your self, as in mental, emotional, physical, well being and status...
Be honest with your answers...you will be the only one to see the answers, so be truthful with your self.....
Another option would to be to talk to a mental health professional, or someone at an agency for young mothers who could listen and help you assess your situation.
This is a serious situation that needs dealt with in a mature fashion. Strength needs to be learned.....some people could help you with that.
Also, counseling for contraceptive use needs to be a top priority in order to prevent pregnancy and disease. (I know, you have a boyfriend! Just remember their are plenty of young, hot girls out there for im to sleep with who can have fun and aren't stuck home with the kids or barefoot and pregnant! It wouldn't be the first time that a young guy strayed & brought home a fatal, life altering disease.

Answer 11

That's incredibly unfortunate...for everyone involved. This is what I would do:
I would move to a home for unwed mothers (unless of course you are married :-( .....). I would have either your family, or his, if they are willing to, take care of the 8 month old baby.....The unborn child, I would give the baby a chance and let him be adopted by people who are really ready, willing and able to do so. There are many agencies out there. Don't abort it; change everything about the way your life is going now, and DO THE RIGHT THING....
What do you mean, "I certainly didn't plan it....." You took no measures to prevent it, obviously.
I am not bashing you. But you need to own up, and get it together. These children (and YOU are still one yourself) are truly going to suffer.