She is a lovely, really sweet woman who takes care of everyone. really sexy too :P she was abused before and me and her are supposed to be moving in together. She says that she wants this more than anything, that she loves me more than anything and i've been the best thing that's happened to her. but she keeps pulling back, she also gets anxiety. when this happens she cries like she's dying and she says she still loves me, that she is sure of what she wants. but something is stopping her from moving with me. she has also quit her job and college to move in with me, so at the moment she is in limbo. she says she just needs me to support her, but i dont really know how.
2006-10-28 13:14:29 · 12 answers · asked by bobwilliams283 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
she doesn't need money. she has saved some.
2006-10-28 13:17:59 · update #1
she's supposed to be going to college by me.
2006-10-28 13:19:00 · update #2
I was in an abusive relationship before I got out and found my husband. It took a while for me to trust him. Once you've been abused by someone you care about you find it hard to allow yourself to care that much about anyone again because you're afriad they'll do it the same. You don't trust your own judgement and you're constantly saying to yourself "I let the first guy do it to me.. what if I'm falling for it all again?" Just let her know you love her and would never hurt her. Give her her space and ask her if she would like to go to couples counseling with you. You may not need the counseling, but it will mean a lot to her if you're willing to attend by her side. Good luck!
2006-10-28 13:19:05 · answer #1 · answered by Jennifer F 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its vary important I mean vary important if you do love her to do just that, and basically that just means she needs to feel secure like you need to tell her your there whatever she does works doesnt work for now if that was understood when she quit, when your sitting around watching tv or eating dinner or something just say "you know i'm here for you right" and you can always talk to me and she is probly looking to hear future plans either staying "together forever" or marriage, if this is not in your plans you need to do something right away because it sounds as if she could become really unstable she wants the fairy tail to be true but trusting herself hasnt prooved to be one of her strong points and she is afraid to do it again this happens to a lot of girls and they usually pass by mr right because of it and stick with mr wrong its some kind of curse or disease, please help us break free from it GOOD LUCK!
2006-10-28 20:23:57 · answer #2 · answered by KIMBUR 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg, tell this girl to WAKE THE HELL UP!!!! you too!! why would a girl with ambition want to quit her job and college just to move in with some guy??? and what kind of boyfriend are you to let her??? That was a VERY stupid mistake for her to make over something shes not sure will last more than3 a year.. I mean, come on.. tell this girl to get serious and grow up.
2006-10-28 20:18:39 · answer #3 · answered by Stacy K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She basically has already answered your question. Whatever her problem is, she knows that she has to find the answer. Even though you feel it is your role to protect and care for her, sometimes the best way to do that is to allow people to figure out things for themselves. She is not your wife nor your child. She is a grown woman and she has some issues that she will figure out in time. Be patient. As long as she is not harming herself physically, then you need to let her do it on her own - until the time comes that she asks for your help.
2006-10-28 20:20:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not that easy, and not that difficult too. Hold on to her, and give her the support she needs. But most important, tell her you decided that you guys should postpone moving in together because you feel her, and because it is important for you that she feels better about this step. Having said that, mean it, and stick to her with support, do not pressure her; untill she is 100% ready.
2006-10-28 20:22:24 · answer #5 · answered by Rached N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi there
i was abused about 13 years ago and it is hard to get over but with the love and support of family and friends she can get over it
when i meet my husband i had 2 black eyes and he still seen through it and now we have been married for 11 yrs and have 5 children and it was because of him and his family that i got through it and now iam studying to be a registered nurse so just be there for her and give her all the love and support you can try and get her to talk to you or if she feels she cant talk to you then maybe if you have a sister she if she can talk to her.
good luck and tell her she isn't alone
2006-10-28 20:21:58 · answer #6 · answered by wcn_95 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not to be funny, but she needs therapy. Get her some counseling before you both move in together otherwise it is going to put undue stress on both of you.
2006-10-28 20:21:35 · answer #7 · answered by GMAN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she needs you to support her financially if she quit her job.
2006-10-28 20:15:40 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to quit being a lazy little c*nt.
2006-10-28 20:17:01 · answer #9 · answered by Reality 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude...back away! Seems to me like your story is going to turn into a Lifetime suspense/drama movie. This girl is C-R-A-Z-Y.......
L-O-C-A-!
2006-10-28 20:24:57 · answer #10 · answered by Nerds Rule! 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋