as I'm writing this question. My son noticed it a couple of hours ago and all the children are very upset. I can't get them settled - the hamster (Candy) is hanging on but I think she will die tonight.
Does anyone have any advice on helping the children cope - I've already tried the hamster heaven talk.
2006-10-28 12:23:32 · 31 answers · asked by nettyone2003 6 in Pets ➔ Other - Pets
tell the children jesus needs candy in heaven, so she has agreed to go, but she will always love them, and watch over them. Tell them Candy wants them to get a new little hamster pet, the one they pick, was chosen by her, it is her little gift to them, for helping jesus, by letting her go to heaven., and she will love them always, and the new little hamster she has chosen for them, and not to be sad, she is happy to go and help jesus in pet heaven.
2006-10-28 12:29:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I am so sorry about Candy. A year ago, my hamster Nippy died slowly and there was nothing I could do but hold her and comfort her. It's hard for an adult to handle, but much harder for a child.
The hamster heaven talk was a good move. Explain gently to them that nothing lives forever, especially a hamster, but the memories of the time that they had with Candy will last forever. Tell them that, because of their love, Candy had a good, happy life and she won't forget them when she gets to hamster heaven. Comfort your children while they cry and let them know it's okay to mourn. Just because death is natural doesn't mean it doesn't hurt those who continue to live!
After she does die, have a funeral for Candy and let the children participate if they would like to. I've found it's a good closure. If you and your children would like, go and pick out another hamster for them to love. I have often found that filling an empty hole caused by death with more love and life is the fastest way to heal. That is, as long as it's understood that the new hamster is not a replacement for Candy because she was one of a kind.
I sincerely hope this helps! Again, I'm so sorry for your family's loss.
2006-10-28 12:35:58 · answer #2 · answered by Avie 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if you are religious (I'm not) but I think if you are, it might help if you lit some candles and ask them all to say a prayer for Candy. Tell them Candy will feel better if they don't feel too sad and that she is going to a good place where she will never be in pain again.
It's very difficault to explain death to young children but onfortunately this is a very important life lesson they are learning tonight.
Don't spend too much time on this though, try to distract them somehow. This is one time when spoiling kids is ok, give them sweets and let them stay up late and all that.
When the hamster is dead, let the children help plan a funeral, "build" a coffin, sing a nice song and light candles. Don't buy them a new hamster and think that will solve the problem. Let them ask for a new one or don't get one.
Wish I could be more helpful.
2006-10-28 12:30:10 · answer #3 · answered by IC 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depends on the ages of the children. If they are very young, they will accept it quite easily. Sounds weird, but it's true. Young children are very pragmatic. If the hamster was sick, you can assure them that it won't feel bad any more. If any family member has died -- a grandparent or whatever -- you can assure them that that person will look after the hamster in heaven.
But don't obsess about it. If you do, the children will pick up their cue from you. Make sure the little creature is as comfortable as possible, and plan now for the funeral and burial. They can even help make a little headstone for it.
2006-10-28 12:33:29 · answer #4 · answered by old lady 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont know if there is much you can do. When I was in the fourth grade my hamster died & I was devistated. We burried him in the back yard & I made him a grave stone (Hey, I was in the fourth grade it made me feel better even though it was only a hamster haha) but that way I could still go visit him & stuff. Also try explaining to them that sometimes it's just better for them to be in peace rather then suffer from old age and explain that hamsters dont live very long & they did the best they could to keep her happy & healthy for as long as she was alive. Maybe you should get another hamster (as my mom did for me) or maybe something that will live longer like a puppy or kitten or something along those lines. Actually, I think guennepigs live longer & they are bigger so you wont be able to lose them as easy when they escape from their cages - something you have probably been through I know I have at least a dozen times. Haha - anyways good luck :]
2006-10-29 07:01:07 · answer #5 · answered by ASHLEY MARiiE <3 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How old are the children? If you think they are old enough I'd sudgest going with the truth. Simply say that all things have to die sometime and sometimes some animals don't live as long as people.
Explain that yes you will all miss Candy but that it's most important to rember all the good things.
Also let them know it's ok to cry, it's important that they know that it's ok to be sad.
Having a "good-bye" cerimony/ funeral for Candy may be a good thing too.
2006-10-28 12:30:34 · answer #6 · answered by gitana_diosa 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Actually the best thing to do is to allow your children the opportunity to grieve. It is a sad time for all of you and reassure them that it is OK to cry and feel sad about their hamster dying. All animals will die sometime but the joy and happiness they have given you is the best way to remember them. Honestly answer any questions they have, don't be brutal about it, but tell them that Candy was sick, old (whichever it was) and that it was her time to die and we wouldn't have wanted her to stay with us in pain. Unfortunately it is one of those experiences that every child needs to have and dealing with it sensitively and lovingly will help your children in the long term.
2006-10-28 12:34:42 · answer #7 · answered by mooremob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it really is a puzzling component to do i comprehend. i'm 13 years old and that i'd go and cry if my mom informed my hamster died ( I have 7 hamsters). i imagine you'll in basic terms sit down unhappy and stuff even as she asks you what befell. in basic terms tell her slowly that her hamster died. possibly she will be able to cry and stuff yet later she will be able to not imagine too a lot about the hamster. Yeah i imagine even as she will be able to forget a touch about the hamster, i'd get a clean one yet i does not want to get one because it really is unhappy even as your puppy dies because you've been quite suitable to that puppy and it really is a puzzling component. If she reallly needs one, get it like after one month see if she needs. i do not comprehend if my hamster died, i does not quite want to have yet another one and comprehend that this one is going to die after 3 and a 1/2 years.
2016-12-05 08:08:14 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think the heaven talk will work..it all depends on their age, but it needs to be explained that the hasmter is a living creature just like them but unlike humans it ages much faster for reasons out of our control and eventually it has to sleep after a good, well taken care for life but dont be overly quick to try to cheer them up when they are upset, it is a part of life. Ofcourse comfort them but they need to understand it as an experience and not through a mere fantasy like Santa
hope this helps
-David
2006-10-28 12:40:37 · answer #9 · answered by David R 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them you will let them pick out a hamster at the store and let pick them pick out some new toys and treats for it. And tell them its a natural part of life for a pet to die. Let them have hamster funeral with flowers and all the hamsters favorite toys insisde its grave let them each tell funny or cute story about the hamster. Ad they will move on. Good luck.
2006-10-28 13:04:02 · answer #10 · answered by bubbles 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pack some food and bedding in a little hanky and tie it to a twig. then mysteriously find it and say that you think the hamster is planning to go on a trip somewhere. then make sure you dispose of the poor animal effectively when it expires and the kids will think it's on holiday. Email pictures from round the world from time to time and they will think it's still on it's travels. If the heaven thing isn't working, it's not the right time to deliver that speech. Try the heaven talk when it's less traumatic, when there isn't the danger of any imminent deaths.
2006-10-28 12:33:30 · answer #11 · answered by THE BULB 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋