posed a question about telling the wifes sister earlier. thanks for the responses - i had pondered over all the things that have been said. asked wife about more sex - she doesnt want any - had sex with her 5 times over past 4 years. discussed it with her, asked her if there was a problem - says she is too tired or i dont find the right moment - tried everything - she says she loves me and i believe her - i love her and my kids. dont want a devorce.
*told my wifes sister today that i liked her and have done for a while - said she was shocked but was ok with this - she did not want to take things further as she did not want her sister hurt and i respect that. asked her not to tell my wife and she agreed - what should i do now!! my wife wont give it up and i dont want to seek anyone else!
2006-10-28 10:51:25 · 19 answers · asked by Jimmy P 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Leave your wife..shes not a wife just a cow..she must be sleeping with other guys.
2006-10-28 14:49:34 · answer #1 · answered by fajita 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would NEVER try things with a sibling! There are too many fish in the sea to keep it in the family. Find someone else if you have to have an affair. Because sooner or later, your wife WILL find out, (probably because the sister will end up telling her for some insane reason). Then what will you do? You've succeeded in ruining a sister relationship as well as a marriage. And, the kids will blame you too. You have to make yourself happy--even if that means a divorce. My parents divorced when I was 3, and I'm 32 now. As a married adult myself, I would never have wanted my parents to remain together and be miserable. You, your wife, and your children would probably benefit most from divorce in the long run. Even though that's the last thing that you want to face right now. Don't do a "quick fix" with the sister.
2006-10-28 10:59:56 · answer #2 · answered by adstidamrn 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
jezzy peeps - your wifes sister. thats a bit much is it not. i know it's not fair that your wife is not into sex at the moment - well not for a while then - but her sister!!!! can you not persuade your wife to see the doctor. maybe you both need to be referred to a sex clinic where you will both get help to rediscover all the things you loved about each other. sometimes it doesn't have to be full sex. women like to be held, cuddled and stroked. maybe if you did this for a while instead of always pressurising your wife for sex all the time things might improve.
i am really glad that your wifes sister is a decent and kind lady else your wife would have lost everything.
2006-10-28 11:10:40 · answer #3 · answered by magicalle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When there is a problem in a marriage, it is necessary to see it as a joint problem, not something that is a problem for just one of you. Therefore, you and your wife have a problem, try putting it like that to her, and tell her you need her help you to put it right. It can be done. If she feels supported and accepted she may be willing to try all ways to get herself back on track. I'm glad you don't want a divorce, many men would.
As for her sister, I am afraid I think you did the wrong thing in telling her your feelings for her. It puts her in an awkward position doesn't it? And If she ever got mad at you she could use this to hurt you, or of course to hurt her sister. If you really intend for nothing to come of it you had no need to mention it at all. I would let it go.
You need counselling as a couple, it does help. Explain to your wife how you love her and want your marriage to sizzle like it used to.
2006-10-28 11:06:35 · answer #4 · answered by good tree 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be rational. You are finding a woman attractive. A woman the most like your wife on the planet. You love your wife but teh situation is becoming unbearable. Explain to her that you both need help and get some. preferably before your sister-in-law tells your wife.
2006-10-29 01:42:42 · answer #5 · answered by miniegg 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The two most frequent reasons people get divorced are money and sex. This is an issue that can be solved, but will take work, most likely some counseling. Don't put it off, seek professional help, your sister in-law is not the answer.
2006-10-28 11:03:22 · answer #6 · answered by Rodney 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Here you are thinking about sex.Your wife has given you clues as to what is her problem.Kids (can take a lot of energy),you don't find the right moment.Maybe she needs to be romanced.
PURSUE YOUR WIFE AS YOU DID WHEN YOU FIRST MET.
FLIRT WITH HER.MAKE HER FEEL SEXY AGAIN.ONCE A WEEK HAVE A DATE NIGHT.Just a few suggestions.
P.S Stay away from her sister.when you starve something long enough it will die.Starve the thoughts you are having of her sister and put that energy into winning your wife's heart back
Stay away from her sister
2006-10-28 12:46:52 · answer #7 · answered by JUSEve 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you r a very patient man to put put with lack off sex so it suggests you love your wife not her sister
who may in the end give you sex but that's not everything
go to co uncling and bring it up with your wife but stay away from her sister
2006-10-29 00:40:00 · answer #8 · answered by veronica 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did your wife like sex before you had kids? i think she mite of forgotten how nice it can be. have you told her its important to you . can you not get a baby sitter and go away for the night to gether. and see if she fell different away from home. do you cuddle at all it would be a good start. have you ever give your wife a mas sarge. little things like that lead to other things. AND KEEP AWAY FROM SISTER IN LAW WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF SHE TOLD YOUR WIFE
2006-10-28 11:05:02 · answer #9 · answered by debbie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey theres a lot of it about i sympathise have been with my boyfriend 4 years and its a year since we had sex. He uses all the reasons like work and tiredness but i work the same hours and am a mum so whats with that
Maybe love is just more important than sex i couldnt hurt him by cheating
2006-10-28 11:00:34 · answer #10 · answered by Trish 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋