Well. I dont think my husband is cheating on me now, he's always tired physically... falls asleep on the couch... he used to want to have sex with me all the time, but I always said no... which I regret, that caused his cheating ,,, anyway,,, He is now trying to work out this marriage , he quit drinking which is huge ... I don't know why he doesnt wanna have sex anymore.......... I look better than before, I take a shower 2~3 times a day... always wear pretty clothes,, I am not ugly or fat... I'm such a sweet girl ... he just turned 32 and I'm 27.. married for 3 years now... do you guys think he's just getting old? I feel bad for making him do me... I'm so confused...
2006-10-28 03:29:40 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
hello, first i want to tell you that there is nothing you did to cause your husband to cheat on you. He made that choice. Also, he has a drinking problem and you have been affected by his drinking and betrayal. I suggest you consider going to al anon, even if he is not currently drinking. many times when someone stops drinking they get depressed. Look up the effects of alcohol and infidelity on the partner online and you will understand why you feel the way you do. You will begin to understand what he is going through also. The more you get hooked into his behavior the more you will lose yourself. Try to detach, you didn't cause it, you can't controll it and you can't cure it. You need to heal from what has happened. Be gentle with yourself and remember whether he wants to be with you or not, you are a beautiful being so start taking care of yourself. Try not to mention making love for a few weeks, be kind and gentle with him too and see what happens. Good luck.
2006-10-28 19:11:57 · answer #1 · answered by alwaysdd603 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, I think it is because he gave up alcohol. That can put a man into depression and because of that they can have a low sex drive.
He has asked you for sex and you have refused him, so he must have thought that you generally don't like sex. Right now since he is having a low sex drive, he just does not want sex.
Only way is to talk to him. Don't ask about sex, just give him a hug and ask him what are the problems he is going through. He needs a person like you badly if he is depressed. It will take time to get over alcohol but it will go after sometime.
Tell him you love him and want sex.
Good luck and hope everything goes well
2006-10-28 04:00:12 · answer #2 · answered by Mr Business 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like he is cheating #1. #2 you should have never turned him down so much. #3 he may be depressed, especially if he quit drinking. #4 Stop worrying about how you feel and ask him how he feels every once in a while. This is where people go wrong, always caring too much about themselves and not enough about the person they need to care about.
2006-10-28 03:34:24 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first thought is that he might be depressed. Often when people quit drinking, their feelings of depression come back. That is because their drinking may be an attempt to self-medicate. Once they quit drinking, they may need antidepressants to get their mood back to normal. Low sex drive and low energy are signs of depression. Of course some antidepressants affect the libido, so you need to choose wisely. Wellbutrin has fewer sexual side effects, so that might be an option. Have him go in for a physical, then maybe consider medication if all else is fine.
2006-10-28 03:33:53 · answer #4 · answered by schweetums 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl!!! You shower 2-3 times a day! you are washing away all your sex attraction. I love a girls smell. I am sure a guy is like men and we want to have sex with a WOMAN not a bunch of rose petals!
Sauce up.. it's sexier!
2006-10-28 04:18:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think because you use to refuse him when he come to you for sex,he do not waNT to touch you any more he fed up and is getting it else were.he would not just come to touch d,nt matter what you put on cause he is tried of hearing no.so he rely on other.I am sorry but I hope you all can work things out especial seeing that you all is married.
Best Wishes
2006-10-28 03:38:22 · answer #6 · answered by Cherry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I don't understand why he wouldn't want to? You guys are young and in love.The only thing I can think of is that you still have issues you haven't dealt with. Or you think you have dealt with them but honestly you didn't. Try to talk to him about it, communicate. If you can get through the issues, then maybe you two can start to have sex again.
2006-10-28 03:35:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe hes just bored?take him to an adult store and have him pick out a toy for you to use on yourself in front of him--what guy wouldn't get turned on by that???Or you could ask him whats going on a tell him how you feel-as a guy I hate to have that talk but if it is needed then its better to get it over with-just be ready for the answer-you might not like it
2006-10-28 03:38:34 · answer #8 · answered by I'm laughing WITH you 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is key.
Tell him exactly what is on your mind and hopefully he'll return the favour and tell you how he feels. Let him know that you have your needs, ask him for the credit card and go treat yourself to some chocolate, whipped cream and toys!
2006-10-28 03:36:25 · answer #9 · answered by lady from the other day 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does it always have to be about you, have you once considered that he may be having problems getting it up and you aren't helping any by stressing him out. You are driving him away with your wants.
2006-10-28 03:35:19 · answer #10 · answered by King Midas 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋