My dad past away last year. my grandpa( mom's dad ) died and 2 weeks later grandpa's lil bro died.Mom and us kids have been through alot. No to mention financial problems. My parents house got broken into 4 times. My little brother broke in the house.He is over 21 and he no longer lives with us. So i can u see its a mess.
I havent worked in over 2 years since i stopped to look after mom who had health prob & granny (mom's mom) who has dementia ,is blind and cant walk.
Before dad died, i wanted to go to harvard and get my master degree. I also wanted to move out of canada and live in boston for awhile and then come back. But now i hesitating to do so. my brother want otherwise.My mom , hesitate to leave behind. A close friend of the family( close friend of mom) claims that i should move and live my life and start making my own path.Im 29 and i feel stuck.
I dont know wheter to go ahead and try to live my dreams or not. Help? what should i do?
2006-10-27 22:10:34 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I'm sorry for what happen to your life. I'm 27 have been in similar situation, not as hard as you.
My mom had cancer, she passed away few years ago.
At that time I was a coward and ran away from the responsibility I should take.
I still regret that No matter how much I want, I can't never take care of her anymore. And my dream doesn't quite become reality.
If you go who will take care of your mom?
Could you go ahead and do your dream at your full heart?
I think, either way, you should face the reality and get a job.
A dream is a dream, you can go have your dream whenever before you life end.
It would be different if your mom share the same dream.
Or better, Be creative!! Find a way to adjust your dream so that you can take care of your mom and have your dream at the same time.
Be strong liipl 2.
It will pass.
2006-10-27 23:26:02 · answer #1 · answered by CS_whoamI? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your thinking of going to Harvard you'd better brush up on your English youngster. I would think a good city University should suite you well with all these other problems around and, you'd be able to help around the house. With the supposed education you claim to have already I'd think you'd be able to get into some area that would suite you for work.
Your mom is helping your "granny" she could get help here from Social Security and Medicaid, it's not like she's sitting out there alone, You only have to chose the right path to follow and take it.
As for your little brother, tell him the next time he "breaks in" the cops are going to come for him and, follow through, tough love is something that has to be considered. Good luck
2006-10-27 22:23:55 · answer #2 · answered by cowboydoc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no perfect answer. My gut feeling is that you can only help people if you first help yourself. You could see what kind of low-income services you can find your mom and grandma that could help them continue without your help for a while. Then you could start making your own path while keeping in close touch with what is happening at home and continuing to let your family know that you care about them. It may take you a few years, but at some point you will probably be in a better position financially and emotionally to give them more support than you would have had you stayed. Peace and good luck to you. There are no wrong choices, only things to learn.
2006-10-27 22:24:54 · answer #3 · answered by lavender-chartreuse 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry. That is a very sad story. If you can not stand taking care of anyone for a while than is it possible to have a caregiver provided by the health care system for the area that you live in? I know that you have to love your family with all your heart or you would not have sacrificed your plans to take care of them. Can't you get paid by the government to take care of them for a while at least until you figure everything out? I think that if you could just focus on what you want to do in your heart without outside opinions you will make the best choice. Make a list with the pros and cons of staying and moving to help you sort it out. Sorry I can not help you more. I think that it is pretty special that you would take care of your family like that, you probably really mean a lot to them.
2006-10-27 22:27:10 · answer #4 · answered by Baby Ruth 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have been through a lot! Start by finding somone to talk to about all of this. I don't know where you are in Canada, but try to find a group to share your ideas and dreams with. There are lots of single parent groups that your Mother might enjoy, too. They aren't just for dating but to meet other parents in the same position. If you are involved in a church, talk to your pastor? I think the final decision has to be yours, and you do deserve a dream! As for your brother, if he's such a loser, don't worry - he has to find his own way. You can find some of these groups by using the search engines on the web. Good luck to you and congrats on being in the position to get a master's!!!
2006-10-27 22:19:32 · answer #5 · answered by dallygirl89 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the end all we have is ourselves and our family. All the degrees in the world aren't going to make you feel right about leaving them behind. Why is Harvard the college you want to attend? It is so expensive to go there and to get a full scholarship is tantamount to impossible, as you say your family is enduring hardship, this could only make things worse. Is it impossible to gain your masters at a community college? I think you should stick it out and try to make it as a family. I am not saying make yourself a doormat for your family I am saying that you're all in it together. Your brother who broke in needs to have his butt booted into prison, charge him, he wont learn if you all keep letting him get away with it, this is the time for tough love for him.
2006-10-27 22:17:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm an ex Jw. i think of the perfect issue is with faith. a super form of wars have been fought interior the call of Christ, it makes you start to ask your self. no person is attentive to for a fact that Jesus ever lived. no person is attentive to for a fact that our theory of God is even appropriate. The Bible has been written and edited via adult males, for extremely some motives. God is ability. Watch a documentary Stephen Hawkings did on the life of God. It talks approximately how the completed universe is built of ability in it extremely is extremely some varieties. I propose hell if we are built of ability, and made in Gods image. Then in keeping with possibility Hawkings is directly to something. P.S. You dont might desire to worship God. merely stay.
2016-11-26 00:30:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a really heavy burden... but have you considered approaching a social worker who might can actually help? You can't go on spending time focusing on these issues and neglecting your life entirely. If you want to pursue your dreams, get someone for help ;-)
2006-10-27 22:25:45 · answer #8 · answered by pee_bag 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋