Ever since I was a young I've been quiet. Not really because I'm shy, I am shy, but I just can't think of anything to say. I'm a good public speaker, I got a good grade in that class. However thats only because I could rehearse and I knew what to say. When I have to talk normally, my mind just goes blank. It's really hard for me to make friends because of this.
2006-10-27 20:58:53 · 12 answers · asked by Travis 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Common interest! That is the key to relaxing. If you both enjoy the same thing the talking is much easier.
Try to find the common interest. That's the key.
Good luck!
2006-10-27 21:01:24 · answer #1 · answered by iamantonio 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looking at the other answers, it seems you've got good company. I have to communicate professionally for a living, but I assure you it's just a professional strategy. In real life, it takes me about two years before I can talk to someone. I abhor idle chit chat and polite discourse about the bloody weather etc. No social skills whatsoever, in fact, most people dislike me on first contact. Which solves the problem of having to talk to them - there isn't any conversation! Enjoy your solitude - it's a priceless gift.
2006-10-28 04:12:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tips For Overcoming Shyness:
Check out the tips in the article on self consciousness, particularly the ones to do with where you focus your attention.
~Practise becoming fascinated by other people. Ask them about themselves, and concentrate when they answer you. Remember what they tell you about themselves so you can talk about it later, or on another occasion.
~Great socialisers make other people feel comfortable and interesting. How do they do that? By being really, genuinely interested in other people. If you are talking to someone and you feel boring or inferior, ask why that is. Is it really all your fault?
~Practise using fewer 'personal pronouns' when you talk about things. Sentences beginning with 'I' are not only a turn-off for the listener, they also keep the focus of attention on you, which increases shyness. (Note: Of course, part of friendship is giving away things about yourself, but only when you feel it is appropriate to do so.)
~Remember that the way to overcome shyness is to focus elsewhere. Like on imagining what it will be like to really enjoy the social event, on how it will feel to be full of energy, or to be having a great conversation with someone.
The exercises and techniques contained within the Self Confidence Course should help with shyness because they focus on what to do to feel confident, rather than how to avoid feeling shy.
Overcoming shyness is about doing the things that allow you to enjoy social situations, not wondering why you feel shy! Good luck and I hope this article has been useful.
2006-10-28 04:09:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I start by saying its your character, am just like that and I discovered the reason to why. Allow me to say it from my point of view:
I don't talk and when I want to talk I really want to make point clearly. I can have an idea but how to bring it out to reality to someone is what makes me not to talk it out. I say quite outside but inside am noisy. I reason behind that is not that your mind runs blank and you lack a suitable way in which you can bring sense to the listener. Am good at writing such that I can bring out clear point of what am writing; but its a difference issue in the case of talking face to face.
Don't worry, I stop worrying.
2006-10-28 05:04:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might have social anxiety. Where you are anxious when interacting with others. You're worried so much about your own thoughts and feelings or what others think about you that it takes up all the thoughts in your brain and you can't think of anything else except being anxious. Therefore you freeze up and can't think of anything to say.
Read up on it on the internet and see if the symptoms describe you. Do a test on the internet and see what you get.
Good luck!
2006-10-28 04:06:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
before you go off the deep end with worry...
you are a studier
not a participater
this is the way YOU were made
most people like you are the behind the scenes person
they get things done that no one else can
most likely cause they took time to think about it
embrace who you are
its a good thing
you were designed to be this way for a reason
let yourself go
and get on with life
your off the hook
not everyone is SUPPOSED to be a socialite
go do what you like best and the hell with it!!!
2006-10-28 04:13:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you get tired when you are around people for more than two hours?
Once the pre-planned speech has ended, and you have answered questions, can you mingle with people?
Do you prefer to be alone at times?
If you answered yes to these questions, you are most likely to be an introvert.
2006-10-28 04:05:22 · answer #7 · answered by Kavliaris 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel bad, I think all of us feel that way sometime. I work in customer service but still am not good with idle chit chat. Just can't think of anything to say sometimes or don't want to.
2006-10-28 04:02:34 · answer #8 · answered by Toni M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i have the same problem. When I have a couple drinks however everything seems to be fine and I can talk about anything.
2006-10-28 04:04:11 · answer #9 · answered by E 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i used to be this way but.....i never could speak in front of and audience either.....i got a job working with the public and that did it for me .....now you cant shut me up...lol
2006-10-28 04:00:54 · answer #10 · answered by Lisa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋