How can I overcome the fear of looking for a job?

Question

I had to file for bankruptcy because I got behind on my house payments. My boyfriend is paying all the other bills. My ex roommate didn't pay me for 4 months leaving me to pick up all the bills alone. Her part of the bills added up to $2460.00. I am depressed over loosing my job and I hate looking for one. I'm sleeping too late in the day and everything is just falling apart right before my eyes. What is wrong with me? I need to go get a job but I don't.

Answer 1

Life can sling crap at you from time to time and it's normal to be depressed from it. Screw taking pills and listening to people tell you just get over it. You don't get "over" anything, you get "through" it. Natural progression - be depressed for awhile, your situation stinks, no one can blame you!

Then you will eventually look further down the road and see that there is more to existence than depression (it gets boring) and you will see a little more clearly, chomp down a Snickers (or two) and log onto Monster.com to look for a worthwhile occupation.

Unemployment is an unnatural state. We all hate our jobs, but as soon as we don't have one we feel unneeded, depressed, broke, and without direction. At least after the first few weeks of Golf, shopping, and coutless hours of DVD watching.

Anywho, don't be depressed too long, you'll miss the joy of having a few weeks away from the Rat Race. Look for the silver lining - you're still as intelligent as you were when you had that job, probably moreso now, so why wouldn't someone else hire you to do the same thing. And maybe for more money!

Good Luck!

Answer 2

What is making you afraid of looking for a job? The interview part is daunting but the more you do it the easier it gets. I'm just re-entering the workforce now after 2 years unemployed because I had really bad post traumatic stress disorder & depression & other health problems. It's really overwhelming but the longer you leave it the worse it will get, trust me on this - those bills aren't going to stop comin in & then you'll be in a worse place than you were before. Maybe try going for some work that doesn't mean you have to think too much - nightfill is a great way to get fit & get paid for it. Stacking shelves is an easy job & they don't mind if you leave because you fnid something better.
Volunteer work is an excellent idea - just get you out of the house & doing something plus it looks good on the resume.
I would also sue the roommate if you can prove that they owe you that much money. Write them a letter first & date it, keep a copy for yourself & give them a time frame to pay you back. If they don't respond or whatever then spend the $40 or however much it is to go to court these days.
This is for sure one of those tests that life throws at you but you can handle it - even if you don't feel like it right now you will get through this & learn a little something along the way.
I really wish you the best of luck - I'm glad you have your boyfriend to help you through this difficult time.

Answer 3

There's probably nothing wrong with you beyond the fact that a bunch of crap has gone on in your life, and you got knocked into a slump because it has all been overwhelming.

You could have a touch of depression too, but it may be minor enough that seeing a few good things go on would get you more up and running again.

When you don't feel zippy enough to do what needs to be done you need to figure out how to turn the more complex things you need to do into simpler, easier-to-do, things; and then do one at a time (even if you can only do that when the mood hits you).

If you just send out resumes that will be one thing. You don't need to do more while you're waiting for calls. If someone calls its only one person. Deal with that one person, set up that one interview, and then it will be one more step completed. If you get another call, do things the same way - one step at a time.

Do that with your house too. If you have a time of day when you feel a little more energetic than at other times do one cleaning project or even just one isolated cleaning task. Once its done see if you can just do one more. If you do something like just wash three plates now, and come back and wash three glasses next time, eventually jobs like dishwashing get done.

With every tiny step you take, even if your momentum takes a while to build, you'll start to feel as if you're putting order back into your life. Eventually, the steps will lead to your feeling you are beginning to rebuild as well.

I hate to say this, but eat something that has a little fat in it (like tuna salad) and eat a cookie for energy. I know you shouldn't turn fat and sugar into a habit, but if it helps you get up and running enough to start doing the simple tasks that will lead to your getting things moving they both beat antidepressants.

Answer 4

Wow..I thought I was the only one. Well, I have the lame excuse of being a "freelance designer". I don't know where you live, but try Craigslist.org. if youre in the U.S. They have the neatest job openings on that site.

I've been in and out of depression too, and pretty much broke. I had a job interview earlier and totally bombed it. But I've learned not to take it personally...me and the interviewers just didn't click. I would suggest seeing a doctor and getting some medication, but you probably don't have health insurance, so thats out of the question.

I've found it helps just to get out and immerse and involve myself with other people. It takes all the focus away from yourself, and you can concentrate on being productive.

While you are looking for a job, you should try volunteering at your local homeless shelter in your spare time. Not only will it open your eyes to how much worse it could be, you will feel like you are able to make a difference. Plus it will get you interacting with strangers who will not be judging you. When you get that self esteem back...and that volunteer work on your resume...you'll find it easier to take that next step.

Answer 5

You know where your strengths are and what you're qualified for. Come to terms with why you lost your previous job and how to frame this positively with potential employers. Then, get out there and put your best foot forward and start filling out applications until you get some nibbles. Set a goal of going to two or three places a day and the rest will fall into place.

Most importantly, ask for God's strength and guidance not only for this, but in dealing with this deadbeat roomate of yours.

Answer 6

First of all, you should try to recoup your losses from your room mate. Ask her to pay you $200 per month for two years (make her SIGN this). That's a discount to her and you avoid having the hazzle. If she doesn't pay, threaten to take it to small claims court. Do it, if she doesn't respond.

So, you are having a tough time right now. We all have that now and then. Yes, you should get a job. My best advice is taken from Nike: Just do it! You will feel better once you get it started and even better once you get the job.

Good luck.

Answer 7

Think about your life if you don't get a job...you are lucky that your bf is helping pick up the slack. Get over your run of bad luck and make some good luck for yourself.

Answer 8

take your ex room mate to court. bankruptcy over $2460! start there....

you just have to get yourself together & go do it. it is about responsibility. there isn't any good advice other than just doing it. sorry.

you might want to get your act together before your boyfriend gets tired of being stuck with the bills. you are lucky to have someone like that in your life.

Answer 9

Quit being a sluggard grab your boot straps and go for it life is shorter than you think.

Answer 10

stop thinking about what happened to you because it caused you lots of depression.. move on.. think about it this way.."its their lost, not mine"... and then be confident enough to face new challenges in life..cheers!! come' on i knew you still have what it takes to land a good job... =)