My husband is a very sweet and genuine person and I have never cheated on him however I did end up cheating on my boyfriend at the time to be with him. Now I would like to hang out with some guy friends however my husband gets very jealous and refuses to even discuss it. How can I get him to understand that I will not cheat on him and sacrifice our wonderful marriage?
2006-10-27 15:16:06 · 25 answers · asked by Tanya 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well hows this for fair im sitting at home with the my best friend's kid and my kid while my husband went out with her and her friends so if he can have friends why can't I too and I have always gotten along with men better than women. And as far as true colors go my ex( my daughters father) admitted to being in love with his ex and thats when i cheated before fully ending that relationship.
2006-10-27 15:34:02 · update #1
I hear you. My husband is not usually the jealous type but lately he's been really weird about friends from work who happen to be guys. I'm not an idiot, I know what I'm doing, I've NEVER cheated (on husband or on anyone!) ... I just so happen to prefer guys to women, because men are less complicated, not catty, not as mean, and more fun (in my opinion). I would suggest trying to let your friends and husband get to know each other; maybe go on a double date with one of your friends, his significant other, you & your husband. Then he will see for himself he has nothing to worry about. If not, then gradually work up to it, by finding little ways to incorporate your friends into your lives while showing your husband how much he can trust you. Invite them over to do something you & your husband like to do (like playing cards or other game or watch a movie or football game), maybe throw a Halloween party and each of you invite some friends or something. Don't push too hard, he'll resist... but give him time, that's the one sure thing that can build trust. Good luck!
2006-10-27 15:28:58 · answer #1 · answered by cartmansmom 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋
I fully grasp your harm. These are 2 of the important individuals for your lifestyles. Both are confidants. Maybe that's facet of the intent you're hanging your query right here. You are correct to be irritated along with your husband. He don't have checked out your e mail. I wish you spend your vigor operating for your marriage along with your husband. I placed my spouse because the quantity one man or women in my lifestyles. She comes earlier than different loved ones and peers. If I am having main issue together with her I talk about it together with her. Not my man peers. Now, I discover that ladies are extraordinary and I understand that you just women proportion plenty with each and every different. Some matters you will have to paintings on along with your husband and if you happen to are not able to paintings it out probably move to a reputable. Your pal isn't being handy right here. A female friend that you just proportion stuff with is meant to be supportive. The know-how you proportion together with her will have to now not be used to manage the connection among you and her. She is stepping external the barriers of what a pal will have to do. If she thinks you will have to be doing some thing rather than what you're it's OK if she says so, actually, that's well. If she attempts to make use of her friendship and your secrets and techniques to coerce you that's dangerous. I recommend you and your husband check out counseling. If it comes all the way down to it take the husband over the pal except you're making plans on dumping him.
2016-09-01 03:45:45 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about what you said. You cheated on a past boyfriend to be with your now husband. So he knows what you did then which places the trust issue at the battle front now. Suggestion have mutual male friends. In the long run trust is the only answer.
2006-10-27 15:20:56 · answer #3 · answered by chattylady47150 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is just wrong! I've never fallen off a bridge but you won't catch me walking on the edge all the time. There is definitely more here than what your saying. Why do you want to hang out with guy Friends? At least without your husband with you. No, this is just wrong and I think he needs to give you an ultimatum! No or I go!
2006-10-27 15:24:16 · answer #4 · answered by delux_version 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hmmm...well you did cheat on your ex with your now husband, I can understand why he would feel that way. i guess you need to always include your husband when you hang out with the "guys" so he see for himself its all innocent and eventually gets bored and lets you just go hang out. oh and never lie about anything, even if its just a little thing.
2006-10-27 15:26:01 · answer #5 · answered by cereal_killer034 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a married woman you shouldn't have male friends that your husband doesn't know. I didn't say you shouldn't have male friends I said "you shouldn't have male friends that your husband doesn't know". You and your husband should be able to go out with these guys together. Your husband should be able to go out with them with out you. If your not hiding anything then this shouldn't be a problem. As married people we hang out with more couples then singles. I get together with the other girls and he gets together with the other guys. I have a couple male friends and he has a couple female friends but I know them as he knows my male friends because we have NOTHING to hide. Good luck with this!
2006-10-27 15:27:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've shown him your colors. Now it is going to take a long, hard effort to change them.
Start by identifying why you like hanging with the guys? What qualities do they have that your husband doesn't?
Once you have the qualities (and you can substitute "needs") identified, your task is to bring them out in your husband. Remember - marriage is about the other person. You're here to develop those gifts/characteristics in your husband - just as he is here to learn to meet your needs as a wife/woman.
2006-10-27 15:22:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well I hate to break it to u but u can't force someone to trust u when it comes to that, especially since he knows about your past. It is something that he has to come to terms with. If u really respect his feelings then u would try not to put yourself into a situation where he will end up distrusting u.
2006-10-27 15:23:35 · answer #8 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree that it is hard to have platonic relationships with those of the opposite sex when you are in a relationship and in your case, marriage. As a group, yes. As couples, yes. But to have "alone time" with a man when your husband disapproves is not appropriate. Maybe his trust is not in the other guy-have you ever thought of that?
2006-10-27 15:27:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I personally don't think it's a good idea for married people to have friends of the opposite sex (unless it's like two couples hanging out)... especially if your husband would have a hard time with it--even if you know you wouldn't cheat why do you want to do something that hurts him?
2006-10-27 15:21:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 3⤋