My husband and I are TTC, with no luck, and I'm getting frustrated. Any ideas?

Question

We have 2 beautiful children - we got pregnant with our daughter no problem, and our son we weren't really trying or trying not to. This time around, though, we seem to be having a lot of problems. I'm overweight, but was when we conceived our son... more than anything I'm frustrated to the point of tears! Any suggestions?

Answer 1

Have sex three times a week.

Having regular sex is the best way to get pregnant. Couples often try to time everything perfectly for ovulation but do not have sex when they think they are not ovulating. It is true that sex that is not within the time of ovulation will not result in pregnancy. However, because women do not always ovulate when they think they will, having sex three times a week will help to a woman cover her bases, so to speak, and not miss an opportunity to get pregnant.

2. Use an ovulation prediction kit or fertility monitor.

Using an ovulation kit to predict when you are ovulating will improve your chances of getting pregnant. For many women charting or other methods of ovulation prediction are too confusing. Ovulation prediction kits work by reading LH surges prior to ovulation. They are relatively easy to use and are generally accurate for predicting ovulation. Fertility monitors, such as the Clear Blue Easy monitor, are also a worthwhile investment if you would like to get pregnant faster. Fertility monitors are similar to ovulation prediction kits in that they read changes in LH but they also read changes in other hormones and don’t require any guesswork for couples. They are easy to use and will tell you when the best time to get pregnant is.

3. Have sex before ovulation (not after).

Sometimes couples get confused about the best time to have sex in relationship to ovulation. You have a small window of time each month to get pregnant. After a woman ovulates the egg will survive approximately 24 hours. Sperm, on the other hand, will live for up to three to five days. This is why having sex two to three days before ovulation will increase your chances of getting pregnant. Don’t wait until the day you ovulate to have sex. Your partner’s sperm will last longer than your egg and you don’t want to miss an opportunity by waiting.

4. Don’t rely on the Calendar method for predicting ovulation.

A lot of couples have heard to have sex around day fourteen of your cycle. This is based on the calendar method and assumes that you have a regular 28-day cycle and ovulate mid-cycle. Although this is better than just picking an arbitrary day to have sex, it is not a very accurate way to predict when you ovulate. Many women do not ovulate on day fourteen and knowing precisely when you ovulate will help you time intercourse better. Ovulation prediction kits, looking at previous months bbt charts, or watching for body cues will help you to determine when you ovulate.

5. Charting may not be the best way to predict ovulation.

Charting is great for tracking your cycle but it does have disadvantages. By the time you can see ovulation on a bbt chart, you have already ovulated. It is good to chart so you can track your cycles, see if you ovulate the same time each month, and also so you can look back on your cycle and see if you timed things right. But if this is your first cycle trying to get pregnant or if you are not ovulating at the same time each month, an ovulation prediction kit would be more helpful.

6. See a doctor before you start trying to get pregnant.
Make sure you are in good health and have had a regular check up from your OBGYN or medical provider. Untreated infections, sexually transmitted diseases, or poor health can affect your chances of getting pregnant. Its good to see a doctor as well as start taking prenatal vitamins prior to trying to conceive.

7. Don’t smoke, drink alcohol, or abuse drugs when trying to get pregnant.
This may seem like common sense but many women do try to get pregnant while smoking, drinking or using drugs. Smoking, drugs, and alcohol can affect your fertility. It will also affect your unborn child. It is important to stop smoking or using drugs and alcohol before getting pregnant and not wait until you find out you are pregnant.

8. Have enjoyable sex.

Sometimes when couples are trying to conceive, sex becomes a job or function of reproduction and is not as enjoyable. Plan a romantic evening or try something different to spice things up. How you are feeling sexually may factor into your chances of getting pregnant. Some researchers believe that having an orgasm during sex increases your chances of getting pregnant. For women, the spasmic movements of orgasm will help pull the sperm into the uterus and for men a better orgasm may increase the man’s sperm count.

9. Have sex in positions that keep sperm inside the vagina longer.

The missionary position is a good position to use when trying to get pregnant. Avoid positions where the woman is on top. Gravity will allow sperm to leak out with these positions. Also try placing a pillow under your hips to help tilt your pelvis and keep the sperm in longer. Don’t get up right after sex. Try to relax and allow the sperm to stay in the vagina as long as possible.

10. There is no such thing as trying too hard to get pregnant.
Most couples get pregnant within a year of trying. If you have not gotten pregnant within a year consult your doctor for advice.

Answer 2

My husband and I have been trying for 6 mos. And I have been hearing a lot of "relax, don't stress." Personally I get more frustrated when I hear that, sometimes thinking, "so how am I supposed to do that." In your case I would think that maybe if you are sure to enjoy your 2 kids and the joy of having them, it may help you to stay more positive as you and your husband try to conceive now. Also, try to have fun dates out to set the mood for romance instead of just ttc (even if you know it is around ovulation). Anyway, the latter part is what I am working on now since we are ttc our first. Good luck.

Answer 3

Two questions:
1) How long have you been trying?
2) How old are you? (No offense)

Statistics show that the average time it takes for a woman who ovulates on a normal schedule to conceive is 5 months. That means it takes some women more time, some women less time. If you've been trying unsuccessfully for 1 year it is considered to be a fertility problem.

The older you get, the more difficult it is to conceive. Believe it or not, you actually begin to run out of eggs, and the closer you are to running out, the less viable some of them are. Women over 35-40 years of age often need help conceiving.

Have you spoken to your doctor about it? Your doctor could possibly start you on clomid, which is a medication that helps you ovulate.

Answer 4

This the advise I give to my bestfriend long time ago try to avoid sour food, or pops, or drinks with high ascorbic acid. have always a good rest or sleep which include your husband. fast in smoking or drinking alcohol or beer. both of your try to go for a massage theraphy. try to let it go to avoid stress. but most of all PRAYERS. She had a baby boy which is already 12 years old. miracle happen to those with a good heart who desire good.
One i share is the bus driver of my handicapped son whom there doctor told them that she can't have anymore a baby. she is a heavy woman too. they been waiting it for 4 years. But that morning i just give her the form for petition to St. Jude. she is happy to have it without being skeptical. After a month, she bought a pregnancy test twice that day coz she missed her period and was surrpised to see the result she is pregnant and can't beleived it at first .They went to her doctor which also was very surrpised. Now the baby is 21/2 years old and a girl already. for her ist a miracle. her heart desired and put faith on it without too much expectation. so she got the reward she wanted for. Goodluck. Don't lost hope ok? God Bless.

Answer 5

My husband and i were tried having a baby for almost 3 years but no luck. he also suffers from low sperm count and we didn t have the money for the treatments so i decided to save his sperm in the freezer until i had enough then i went to the pharmacy, got a syringe then i put it all in there (vagina) when i was ovulating. Funny because i even bought the ovulation predictor from 99 cents saving me hundreds n hundreds...o n yes i got pregnant that same month and i gave birth to a perfectly healthy baby girl......

Answer 6

To get pregnant you must have sex on a day that your eggs are being released.

After the 3rd day from the day that menses started put a thermometer into your mouth and check your body temperature every morning before you start turning in bed. The best time is at about 4 a.m. Maintain a chart. You will find that on one day the body temperature drops from 1/2 degree to one degree. This is the day that your eggs are being released. If you want to get pregnant this is the day that you must have sex. Tell your husband to ejaculate on his inward thrust so that the sperms will shoot deep inside.

After having sex you must stay in bed for about 30 mins with your knees bent up with a pillow under your buttocks so that the sperms will not pour out - to enable them to travel up.

Get your husband to save his sperms in the testacles for at least 3 days before sex to enable them to mature well to do their job.

Answer 7

you are stressing yourself...and your body. Nature will make it almost impposible to conceive if your body hormone levels are too high(stress anxiety) you really need to calm down. Just don't try anymore...let nature take it's course....

Answer 8

You need to relax....Stress can play a huge factor in becoming pregnant.
If it happens it happens! good luck!

Answer 9

the best thing to do is to know your cycle very well--know what day you ovulate. Do it two days before you ovulate, the day of, and two days after. Taht's usually the best "recipe" to conceive.

Answer 10

the best thing you can do is just relax and let it happen. remember all good things come to those who wait. good luck