How do I make my mom understand?

Question

I'm 13 and my mom won't let me be me. My mom completely ignores my wishes to dress in my own style. I wouldn't ever consider dressing like a slut. The only way I can explain the way I dress is that Hot Topic the only store close enough to me that sells clothes for my style. Okay, so she hates it. I can't make her understand. Shopping with her is like a trip to Hell. What can I do to explain to her that this is me and who I am? All I want to be is different from the rest of the world and the clones at school. I try my best to be a good person. I don't sell drugs or whatever. You know? What can I do?

I've tried meeting her halfway and everything! I think she's disappointed because I'm not a preppy cheerleader. I think that's what she wanted.

My mom does take me to Hot Topic and if I made it sound like that the only store I shop at, it's not.

My mom does take me to Hot Topic sometimes and if I made it sound like that the only store I shop at, it's not. We just fight about what I can and can't buy.

Answer 1

My mum did that for a little bit, but after she saw how interested I was in the fashion industry (I want to model) and how I want to design, she saw that I'm passionate about it. Now, I dress how I like, and although it's rather "out-there" and beyond her understanding, she let's me be. Dress how you like, dress what you feel good in. Other people's opinions really don't matter if you ask me. You're like me. No drugs, good people, hatred for clones, a love for fashion. Just tell your mum you're dressing in what you love. An that's that.

Answer 2

most parents when they see the store Hot Topic the first thing that comes to their minds is that the people there are weirdos, druggies, rebellious, etc...You don't seem to be any of these. Your mom needs to understand that when you become a teenager most of the time you experiment with your looks, ex: clothing, hair, etc....

I don't know you or your mom but sometimes honesty is the only way you can get through. Start dressing the way you are. Hot Topic is an awesome store, they have a lot of great things there. I don't personally shop there often (only for band shirts) but I can appreciate what they have there.

Tell your mom that you are not happy because she is not letting you be yourself! Also tell her to stop being close-minded and stereotypical of the people that work/shop there. Everybody, preppy or not shops there! I really hope that your mom sees what she is doing and lets you explore who you are as a human.

Also make your mom read these posts online and maybe it's it will open her mind a little.

Good Luck!!!!

Answer 3

I would talk to your grandmother your mothers mom and see if she let your mom dress the way she wanted if she did then I would use that as a point her mother let her where what she wanted and your mom turned out pretty fantastic maybe flattery will get you some where. If that does not work, I have no idea how you dress I don't know what hot topic is but when I was a teenager I dressed like a hore sometimes and some of the grown ups would comment I should not be wearing that but my mom did not care what I wore so but now that I'm 26 I dress in business suites and very classy just like I'm Joan off girlfriends so If you could just re assure your mom that this is just a fase and you will grow out of it but she has to let you go through the phase or you could be dressing like that in college if she let's you get it out of your system now you will probably like the girly clothes when you get to college. You should also appreciate the fact that you have a mom that's not on drugs and cares about you enough to tell you what a young lady wears even though you may not like what she picks out . You could also tell her if she let's you wear what you want you will pick any day she wants and wear what she wants you to wear try and compromise.

Answer 4

Frequently on this planet , the one who works for the $$ decides how it is spent. As soon as you get a job, then you can do the deciding.
Also a 13 year old has no clue about the adult issues, especially about how older men react to suggestive clothing. Unfortunately it is not until many years later that girls start to get a clue or understand, and by then it may be too late. At this time it is your mother's job to protect you and NONE of the teen girls I have ever heard talking had a clue. It would not be natural for you to understand the adult sex stuff so your mom has to make the call.

Answer 5

When I was about your age, my cloths meant a lot to me. I wanted to tell the world who I am. Cloths are essentially a costume.
Make your mom a deal. Let her help select an outfit she likes, I assume conservative, neat. The kind of thing to wear to respectable occasions. This could be your "job interview" costume, it lets you say to the world, hay I can hand in this place if I want to. Then get some cloths that express your individuality to wear to school or hang out with friends whatever.
The point is don't confuse you with your cloths. Your still cool and unique no matter what you wear.

Answer 6

I like to be different at school too. Hot Topic is not the only cool store ask your mom if she'll consider other stores and mix and match and be as outrageous or you as you want. Dont care what others think be you be different convince your mom till her ears bleed from you begging her (laughs-just a joke). If she doesn't even consider it, Make your own clothes cool. Convince your mom to decorate or change your clothes you can make your clothes you. Have fun with it and if you get in trouble be glad you fought for whats right and if you get in trouble act like you dont care for being in trouble. Pretend it went in one ear and out the other! :) Good Luck!

Answer 7

Ok, my mom and I have both got crap from that store but there is a diference between what you can buy in there. You can either walk out of there with a rock type look or one of those I'm gunna hide my sawed off rifel under this trench coat look and if thats the look your going for the weird-*** goth look then your the one that looks like the ******** at school. This is my honest opinion, dont do that to yourself, you can be different and origional wearing jeans and a t-shirt, if thats what your truely trying to be, not just looking for attention.

Answer 8

i would try explaining to her why you like that style so much, try to show her the more subtle parts of hot topic. maybe get her a gift from there and be like" you like it? i got it from hot topic" of course maybe not that rude but somewhere around that. hot topic is not as bad as it seems i go into that store quite a bit but i also shop at places like pac sun, and aeropostale. maybe if you only got a few things from there at a time she might slowly start to understand that a certain style of clothing doesn't bring a certain personality with it. its the person defining the clothes not the clothes that define the person.

Answer 9

I hate to say it, but honey your 13, and this happend to me bascially too. Until you get a job and pay for your own Clothes, you'll have to abide by what mom wants. It sucks that she wanted you to be a preppy cheerleader. I would take you to hot topic in a heart beat.

Answer 10

you should respect her wishes. shes done a lot of work raising you all these 13 years. she supports you financially and cares about you. Would it kill you to look like a regular person. she probably thinks you look like a clown when you dress in "your style" to stand out. She probably doesnt deserve to feel like that. Show her you appreciate everything shes done for you and youre willing to go a little out of your way to show her that.
Dont worry, youre only 13, you have plenty of time when you move out and go to college to dress clownish/ punkish/ whatever your style is.