Cuz one of them doesnt want to save the marriage...bottom line!!
2006-10-27 12:01:33
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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good question. Marriage is a covenant ordained by God in the Bible. It is perfect. Humans, however, screw it up royally. We have our agency to choose right or wrong. It really is that simple. We all choose how hard to work or not work. I guess it is a weakness in our character to give up when the going gets tough.
Keep in mind that there are lots and lots of happily married people in this world. My grandparents have been married over 60 years and they are still alive and have 5 kids, 34 grands and 30 something great grands. Those are the people that are equally committed to being the best they can every day of their lives.
I didn't get married with the idea that one day I would be divorced, but I cannot control my ex and his actions, and as a result divorce was the ONLY answer. his behavior was the reason, not the marriage itself. And there are legitimate reasons for divorce such as abuse, adultrey and addiction. My marriage had 2 out of the 3 A's.
All you can do is take your time when you do find that special someone and watch for red flags. Even then you don't always know, but when 2 people are equally comitted to the cause it can be good. My parents are almost 40 years married.
I met and married my ex within 3 months. I would never do that again. I may have saved a disaster had I taken my time. Don't give up on marriage....just make sure the person you marry is the right person in all ways necessary.
2006-10-27 12:11:48
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answer #2
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answered by TotallylovesTodd! 4
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I don't think that people get married just to get a divorce, although I know it seems that way. I think maybe they get married at the wrong time, or for the wrong reason, and a lot of times, too soon. I feel you should really get to know someone before making that serious of a commitment. That may take years.
Not only that, marriage used to be such a sacred thing, the binding of two people who promise to love each other forever. Now it seems like people will get married for any reason, like its not an important decision, and that will lead to issues.
The one thing to remember is that marriage is not all flowers and rainbows. It is a beautiful thing, but there are always sacrifices. And if the love is real, Those sacrifices will be outweighed by the simple pleasure that you get to be with the one that you love.
It seems like a doomed situation, but there are people who have very happy marriages. Sometimes all we get to see though, are the bad ones.
2006-10-27 12:05:31
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answer #3
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answered by WhyNotMe 6
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There are steps you can take to actually build a strong, stable marriage and avoid divorce. Read here https://tr.im/OVgRo
Here are some key steps to apply to your marriage:
- Start by understanding and being informed.
You can never be too informed about tools, methods and studies about building successful marriages. Understand the risk factors like your age and maturity at marriage can determine how successful it will be, the anatomy of an affair and what you can do after infidelity. Understand the success factors like the personal and psychological circumstances that will influence your marriage, what are the tools and approaches available to you in dealing with conflict, and numerous other relevant data. All this information is readily available to you whether through self-help material, through a counselor, support group or other venues. In fact, we have made it our commitment to provide these to you in different formats to help you make the best marriage you can.
The thing is, remember, this is information is not available for you to begin hyper-psychoanalyzing your relationship, yourself and your partner. It's not a matter of spewing trivia for the sake of conversation ' information is there for you to ponder over and internalize to help you transform yourself and your marriage. That includes maturing to such a point that you become more competent in your knowledge but more prudent in approach.
2016-04-22 18:54:09
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answer #4
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answered by juliana 3
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Alot of marriages work. Its not always easy but are devoted to each other not to bail out at the first sign of a problem. Some people get married with too high expectations and get disillusioned when the reality and responsibility set in especially after the honeymoon period is over. This is where true love takes over and real questions are answered. Some figure at this point that its really easier to bail and do so, especially when our current society no longer looks down on divorces like they once did. This is usually true in younger marriages but in older marriages, couples tire of each other and start looking for new excitement in their lives and move on. But marriage is the staple in families but most people dont care about family values and morals anymore giving them up for inner happiness and pipe dreams that never materialize. People just need to rediscover the true meaning of real love again and what it stands for before its too late.
2006-10-27 12:12:55
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answer #5
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answered by Arthur W 7
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Do you honestly think that anyone says their marriage vows with the intent of divorce, hell no, you stand there as a couple with hopes and dreams ready to take on the world together. People do work on their marriages but it has to be two sided, but some behaviour cannot be forgiven, and who wants or should be a doormat. Still in this day and age, men are not as accountable as women, even with the help of mobiles.....
2006-10-27 13:14:57
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answer #6
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answered by Lulu T 3
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I wonder if you have been married? I wonder if you have been divorced?
I should think hardly anyone gets married with the intention of divorcing but like others have said here, it takes TWO people to make a marriage work. Do you think a woman should stay with a man who is cheating, or who beats her up? Should a man (or a woman) stay with a married partner who refuses them sex and intimacy?
Its very easy to say 'work at the marriage' and not so easy to do if the other person won't!
2006-10-27 22:40:06
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answer #7
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answered by Caroline 5
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Unfortunately, in this day and age people have forgotten what real love is. They would rather worry about who best fits their plans or who looks the best on their arm. Too many people think of marriage as who's convenient right now, not whether they love the other person and want to spend the rest of their lives together. Some listen to what their friends say, too much, when their friends lives really aren't any better.
2006-10-27 12:11:13
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answer #8
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answered by whitetigress1968 1
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But sometimes people have worked at a marriage to no avail. It is idealistic to say that a marriage can be saved by working at it. A lot of people marry when they are too young and what happens is that they grow apart. Sad, but true.
2006-10-30 01:06:15
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answer #9
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answered by chelsea19622000 3
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Marriage is thrown around as much as the words "I Love You."
Both of which have become hollow and empty.
The Majority of the people who get married in this day and age get married and do not think about what they will have to do to keep the marriage going.
Marriage is not easy, the people should not take it so lightly.
2006-10-27 12:16:08
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answer #10
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answered by Engel 3
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I think a lot of people get married have no real idea about what constitutes a marriage. It is not a game...it is not until someone better comes along....it is not until I get bored...it is not as long as the person is still attractive to me.
Some families are so screwed up that children are not seeing a healthy working marriage in their own families so they have no idea what one looks like.
Sad.
2006-10-27 12:05:13
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answer #11
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answered by daljack -a girl 7
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