my wife is having sex with other men?

Question

i have seen my wife is having sex with three different men in three different occations . each time she told me that she would nt do it again , and next time . she will tell that she couldnt help having it . she loves me a lot and i love her too what to do ?

Answer 1

if she's cheating on you that much she doesn't love you. you need to leave her and find someone who will treat you better!

Answer 2

I am in the same boat. Wife cheated she promised no more. Then cheated again, and again,etc.

She may really feel she loves you but is not in "lust" with you.

I thought if I let her be honest with me and just tell me when she cheats some of the thrill would go and it would end. Wrong!

She is banging other guys daily. When I ask why she says once she started screwing around she found she just likes a good hard F'n.

When I said I was willing to do it that way she told me that - no - she just did not see me that way.

She was getting ready to go out and cheat on me one time and I playfully touched her down there and she was very wet! Now this is significant in one way - we had to use lubricant each time because she was dry with me. She obviously got her juices going for other guys and the attention they give.

So I think- like me- your wife loves you but is not in "lust" with you. I don't think my wife will stop the cheating and neither will yours.


Good Luck

P.S. hope that I am wrong and you guys work things out

Answer 3

you have to stop enabling her behaviour, and stop being her door mat. There are no reprocusions to her behaviour so she keeps doing it.
Her stepping out on you isn't your fault. This is her responsibility and she needs to own it. If she doesn't feel remorse then she may not stop. Some people love the "thrill" of doing things in secret. You need to ask yourself what you want and what you are willing to do to save your marriage. Saying you love someone is easy, proving it is a whole nother situation. If she truly loved you she wouldn't be hurting you like this.

Having her cake and eating it too isn't cutting it, she can't continue to live a double life.... she loves the lifestyle she has with you perhaps... Not sure if you have children or not, but they need to thought of in this situation. What are you willing to put up with... are you both willing to go to marriage councilling... I don't want to alarm you, but you need to go to the doctors to get tested... you can't be certain that even if she is "safe" she may not be bringing something home to you... or won't...eventually, she's playing with your life and health too, and that is or should be unacceptable.
There are reasons why she is doing what she is doing, but only she can answer them, if she isn't willing to truthfully take a look the issues, or take a look at herself, then this is the future she is looking at with you or anyone else she has a relationship with.
You are not responsible for what she does. Eventhough it is hard not to think with your heart in this situation, you need to be honest with yourself and be realistic, get all the facts and inform yourself. Talk to someone such as a therapist so they can help you assess your situation clearly and rationally. Making any decision when you are so vulnerable and hurt, isn't a good idea. Weight all the facts, and issues, and make a decision of what or what your are not willing to accept or put up with.
God Bless, Shannon

Answer 4

Really? You ACTUALLY think she loves you? Loving someone and being in love are 2 different things. You CAN NOT have love without having respect. She will not stop, she'll just hide it better. With all of the STDs out there, if she respected or loved you at all, she would not put your health at risk like this. Sometimes being strong is the hardest thing to do. In the end you will be happier! Find someone who will TRULY love you! Everyone deserves AT LEAST that much.

Answer 5

I'm so sorry to hear about your wife being so unfaithful. I'm even more surprised that you have witnessed these acts of betrayal. The only advise I can give you is to ask her if she's willing to go to therapy for married couples, and also for herself to see why she's having this behavior........Go from there. But this is something that both of you will have to do together and apart. You also need to see a therapist and ask why besides LOVE do you keep accepting this behavior. Sounds like you love her more than yourself...Her sexcapades could very well cost you your life.

Answer 6

Before you throw in the towel try some counseling. It sounds like your wife may suffer from low self worth and finds worth in the attention from other men. She may also have been sexually abused and believes she has to have sex if someone wants it. Finally, unfortunately, she may be using you for security and wants adventure on the side. Exploring all the possibilities first makes the most sense. Good therapists can get to the truth rather quickly. Good luck to both of you...Get help!

Answer 7

I have never heard a man that found his wife cheating be so rational. This is interesting. If she loves you, sorry to say she would stop if you caught her not once, not twice but three times. IT is no longer a mistake or something that just happened, this is becoming a habit!

Answer 8

Quit allowing her to do this. You have to leave this relationship because it is not fair to you. She destroyed your vows when she decided to cheat on you now you both have to live with the consequences.

Answer 9

I think you have LUST and LOVE confused. Even a person who is in love knows when to let go and you dont seem to understand

Answer 10

If I were you I would start banging a bunch of broads if she complains just tell her " we love eachother rmember so it's all good "