What would you do if you wanted to end up your marriage with your husband because he is irresponsible but he keeps on saying that let him stay a bit since he has nowhere to go (which is true...)
He has no job and money to find a place to stay...
He promises that he'll leave once he gets enough money to move out...
2006-10-27 08:30:18 · 22 answers · asked by Den 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
5 years of marriage. Wife works hard and got two kids to feed. Got addicted to marijuana and gambling as well.
2006-10-27 08:36:42 · update #1
He's been gambling since their first year of marriage or even longer than that.
2006-10-27 08:37:38 · update #2
I would kick the bum out and change the locks. Why is it your problem that he doesn't have a job or a place to stay? You can help him find the motivation to get off his behind by showing him the door.
2006-10-27 08:32:46 · answer #1 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't consider that emotional blackmail but he is using her because he is a lazy, not want to get a job type person. Where does he get the money to gamble with? Probably from her. I think the hardest part is that they have children. If it is you with this problem get rid of him before he destroys the whole household. If you are talking about a friend maybe you could get her to go to counsel. Sometimes people are just scared to be alone and don't realize how much better they would be without the extra baggage.
2006-10-27 08:45:21 · answer #2 · answered by Maggie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you once had feelings for the man, so give him a chance to find a job and a place to live. But you should set a reasonable timetable for him to do so, and make sure he understands he has to do this. On the other hand, if he's a worthless no good slob who's not even trying, just throw the bum out or he'll just keep dragging you down and living off you. Where there's a will there's always a way...
2006-10-27 08:46:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um, if the problems were to the point that I couldn't take it any longer I'd move out if I had the money! Let him keep the place and go get a cute apartment somewhere. He'll always have an excuse and money is a good one because no matter how much you have it's never going to be enough.
2006-10-27 08:34:35 · answer #4 · answered by Phaylynn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you could do would be to SET A REASONABLE DATE for him to have a job and be moved out by. Say SIX WEEKS????? That should be plenty of time. As you SURELY know, he won't EVER get a job and move as long as you are letting him stay. So, set a date, and tell him that SIX weeks will also be enough time for YOU to decide if the marriage will work or not. So, he has six weeks to find a job, move, OR find a job and win your heart back. Throw the ball back in HIS court. When we know what our choices are, we tend to MOVE a little faster. Best of luck to you.
2006-10-27 08:58:59 · answer #5 · answered by lcamel2000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about it, he will never have the money to move out. If he does, it will be to move in with a girl he just met. For your sake, I hope he sleeps on the couch. Buy him a buss ticket to his parents house. Don't let him or ANYONE tell you what's right for you and your kids!! Tell him he needs to straighten up and get his life together, if not for him for his kids. It's not your job, it's his! You already have YOUR kids to take care of, you don't need one more! Sometimes being strong is the hardest thing to do. GOOD LUCK!!
2006-10-27 09:10:40 · answer #6 · answered by purpledragonflyjrh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He claims he has no where to go? The casinos let you sleep on their benches. If you want the divorce who gives a damn where he goes or what he does? that is unless he has plans to drag you and the rest of the family down the path of self destruction.
If you like the idea of a man commenting on how lovely your perfume smells and you have to tell him it's leather because you've been sleeping in the car then fine....keep him around. If not...make you move and do it quickly before you haven't a pot to piss in.
2006-10-27 08:47:49 · answer #7 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
kick him to the curb, maybe pay a deposit on an apartment with like 2 months free, so he can find a job. DO NOT CO SIGN!
then you will be free, he will have 2 months to find a job or he will be out another home because of his lazyness, he will not budge if you keep babying him and he can see hes getting away with it!
2006-10-27 08:32:51 · answer #8 · answered by crystald 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had one like that.He would'nt move out so I did.
He packed his things and loaded them on the truck with mine and I unloaded them in the driveway.
He kept saying "What am I supposed to do?"
"i've got no money.No job.No car."And I kept saying "That's not my problem.You should have been thinking about these things while you were taking advantage of me.Instead of running all the gas out of my car to go buy drugs,you should have been looking for a job."
I put up with his laziness and abuse for 9 years before I could'nt take it anymore.I was a cold heartless b**** to him and had to do it in front of my kids no less.But I was sick of the beatings and the whining and excuses and I did'nt care if he dropped dead on the spot.And I told him so.
Promises are easy to make and easier to break.Kick him to the curb now and save yourself alot of misery.
2006-10-27 09:05:57 · answer #9 · answered by misbehavin165 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have all the reasons to divorce him,so it's time to get started. He wants to keep you tied down. He wants you to take care of him!. Seems to me,he's laying a guilt trip on you,and you've fallen for it. As long as he has YOU,he does'nt need a job!. Let him go!. You've got to think about your own emotional well-being. If he's driving you crazy,then who's going to take care of you?.
2006-10-28 11:47:37 · answer #10 · answered by Squeakers 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋