I am a drunk and I hate AA because of it's religious doctrine?

Question

I went to AA and I really gave it a positive go. The chanting I didn't like, but I keep telling myself it is good programing. When I started the 12 steps is when I really started hating it. My biggest problem was the learned helplessness that these people allowed themselves to fall into. I kept telling myself it was good thing if it was helping all these people out. The thing that made me stop going was my sponser saying that going to the support group meetings is not real AA. I think that is total f*ucking Bullsh*it to get over any addiction a support group is probably the most effective part to help you cope with the world. I have heard of non- religious programs that are based more on psychology does anyone have info on that? Maybe I just went to a bad group or something.

ok before I get any more pro AA people. all I really wanted was other alternatives other than AA. I know AA has worked for all of you but I have beef with religion. I was raised southern baptise and that really sucked. Another thing to make clear learned helplessness is what keeps women in abusive realtionships and sometimes gets them killed (probably not a good thing) but, anyways if you are pro AA please don't answer the question I know it's helped you, but maybe if you can get it through your head that maybe it doen't help everyone see that is called Dogma and that's why people are willing to die for a belief so rather then die from alchol they die from a belief, death is death I'd rather die from alchol than for belief. All AA is really doing is trading one addiction for another. Some of the creative and influential people in history where alcholics.

Answer 1

I am a child of two drunks. You recognize your obvious problem, so now it is time to find a solution. AA creates a solution for you by filling the hole left by stopping alcohol with religious stuff.

I would suggest that you see an open minded psychologists and tell him exactly what you said in your question. You have to learn a behavior that will allow you to deal with your problem in order to abandon your problem and take on a new life. Religion does not have to be a part of it at all. A judge who finds a man guilty of drunken driving and orders him to attend AA is similar to the judge who finds a troubled young man and orders him to join the Marines.

Study alcoholism on your own, discuss it with a psychologists that your primary physician recommends. It is not advisable to see a psychaitrist because he will basically treat you with medications, which in and of themselves are intoxicating.

So what I am recommending is "cold turkey" with good help. Going it alone may caused you to go back to it.

Answer 2

I read your question, and then I re-read it. I know you added that you don't want any answers from AA people, but, I felt compelled to post anyway. Please have an open mind and consider what is being said here.

You've made a huge step by saying "I am a drunk". Being honest is the first part of recovery, no matter where you go for help. However, you lose a couple of points by saying "these people" (more than once). Sweetie, you ARE "these people". The only difference is, you have decided that the place you went was not for you - and that's your right, and your privelege, of course. Just don't write it off too quickly. "These people" may very well save your life.

I got sober 15 years ago through a combination of AA and therapy. AA helped me to stay sober a day at a time, and therapy helped me to understand why I drank destructively in the first place. For me, it was a successful combination. I was lucky enough to walk into a really great "home group" right off the bat - but, not every group is for every person. After going to meetings daily (and sometimes, in the beginning, more than once a day), I found several groups that I felt really comfortable in, and several where I wanted to run screaming from the room. You just have to go to a lot of meetings sometimes before you find a group where you feel at ease.

AA is NOT a religious program - it is a program of spirituality, and there IS a difference, even though the word "God" does come up frequently. I am NOT a religious person AT ALL, but, that didn't matter. In all the hundreds of meetings I attended (and still attend, from time to time, to this day), I can honestly tell you that no one, anywhere, ever tried to shove religion done my throat, EVER. It simply is not what the program is all about. So far as your comment about the "chanting"? Well, there may be a few phrases spoken in unison at the beginning and/or conclusion of a meeting, but, that is not "chanting". It is a non-religious ritual to affirm the fellowship of all the people in the room. It is not like we are talking about a cult here!

There ARE some people who may seem to have replaced one addiction for another, sort of, by not making the distinction between AA being a BRIDGE back to life, as opposed to BEING a life, but, overall, those folks are not the majority, and, since it doesn't harm you in any way, they shouldn't be the reason you don't go back to AA. Bear in mind that different people have different needs, and that one of the "regulars" or "old timers" may very well be the person who has something to say that you really connect with.

None of this has anything to do with being strong or "helpless". It has everything to do with admitting you need help, and going to a place that has the help you need. If you had a broken car, you wouldn't take it to a refridgerator repairman. You are a drunk - so why not go to a place that helps fix drunks?

Please try again. Invest in yourself by "shopping around" for another group where you feel more comfortable. I guaranty you it is out there. Support groups are not b.s. They are successful, for a reason. No one can help you through something as critical as recovery the way other people who have been in your shoes can. I promise you that there will be a meeting, some night soon, where the person speaking will be telling your life story. It just happens that way.

Please stay honest, and give this another chance. I have faith in you.

Answer 3

I've been attending AA meetings since 1988, and didn't complete the first step till this year. I didn't mind admitting I had no control over booze, but I refused to admit my life in general was unmanageable. Looking further down the list, I didn't like the God stuff either. However, I did like being around the people in AA, and going to meetings kept me sober. I'll suggest to you, though, that AA people are just people. You'll run into snobs, know it alls, holier than thous, and those who just rub ya the wrong way, don't let 'em throw ya. And, if you have a support group you like meeting with, that helps you, attend it. If your sponsor doesn't think it's 'real' AA, tough. In fact, if he's no more supportive than that, tell him this ain't workin' out and get another. For that matter, if you have trouble relating to one group, find another. They're all AA, but they're not all alike.

Answer 4

Maybe you did go to a bad group, or maybe you misinterpreted your sponsor. Don't give up on it, it's really just about learning that you have help to cope with whatever it is. While you may feel that the group is the most effective part, someone else may disagree and think that the one on one sponsor relationship is the most effective part to help them. If you really don't like this group, find another one, but just don't quit! You're doing the best thing for you, don't get hung up on the small stuff. AA really isn't intended to be "religious". 12 steps are about a higher power, whatever it is. Good Luck.

Answer 5

you got one thing rt aa is a good program and will work if you the individual let it work. i am a sober drunk and jhave been for yrs.I do attend aa but 50 aa meetings a week will not keep me sober if i want to drink I make the decision each day i awake wheather to stay sober or get drunk today i have choose to stay sober and its a nice feeling and i thank my higer power.Also i find it in my best interest to leave an aa meeting taking what i need and leaving all else behind.the key to MY staying sober as an attitude that includes staying humble every min and hour of the day .I have found no bad groups in aa but i have seen times when my attitudes sucks and things look bad to me . have a nice day and stay sober its wonderful .

Answer 6

Ben V -
My uncle was a drunker. He never accept AA or others helps kind. Now he is all dependent of my aunt.
You need help, I don't know how is the public health in Australia but I believe there is good and can help you.
A friend of my uncle to abandon the alcohol thru the phisical exercises, swimming and dance. It wasn't easy but he win. Note He had supported for a psicological professional.
I expect you will be a winner.
Note: Excuse me my bad English but I'm learning it.

Answer 7

if you really want to quit anything you have to make up your mind that you want to quit. If you go in with a pessimistic attitude about the whole situation than you're probably not going to accomplish anything. You need to have an open mind and you have to be mentally ready to embark on this new life that you're making for yourself. I understand if you don't want to be in a group that is religious, but just take what they're saying with a grain of salt. They're going through the same experiences as you are and they have just made the decision to use God as their catalyst. Whatever works for them may not work for you. That's okay. Just understand that you can find a little bit of what you're looking for in any one of those people's stories because you are also in the same situation.

The bottom line is this, if you want to truly quit, you'll do whatever you physically and mentally can to do it.

Answer 8

there are always other ways to stop drinking other than aa. maybe you could just go and see a counselor or something like that. maybe you would do better in a one-on-one situation rather than the support group type of thing.

Answer 9

No. Freedom of religion, freedom of decision isn't a guy made proposition meant to be monitored nor controlled with the help of yet another team or regime. although, the present push interior the political section is in direction of Islam..it is quite being tension fed to the international populous. interior the united kingdom, pupils are pushed into the Muslim schedule...all Christian, Jewish or counter Muslim ideals are recognized as opposite to coverage, the holocaust has been dropped from background via fact is now considered as insulting to Muslims. What occurs in Europe ultimately occurs in u . s . of america..this may be a given in our united states quickly...and so it starts off..

Answer 10

There is Narconon it is supposed to be nonreligious.
http://www.drugrehab.co.uk/narconon_life_skills_courses.htm
There is also Rational Recovery
http://www.rational.org/

I know people who have been helped by AA and are not "Helpless" in the least and are very strong independent and productive people.
I know that you don't believe in it, but I will pray for you to beat this illness.
You deserve to be free of it.