I got marry at a young age had 2 babys with my ex husband got divorce. My boyfriend for 2 1/2 years at the begining of the relationship he wanted kids and I didnt cause I was scare now I want a baby my kids are 8 & 6 I feel like Im ready but he dont want babys.
2006-10-27 04:15:29 · 17 answers · asked by negra 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You have to find out why he has stopped wanting them. Maybe he feels that the 2 of you have drifted apart or maybe don't have the money to support having more kids. Just ask him nicely without nagging him then you can work it out together.
2006-10-27 04:25:14 · answer #1 · answered by Jo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whenever two people in a relationship begin to want things differently, I would say it's time to give the relationship a good thinking over.
We cannot force one another to do the things you want to do or to try things we so much desire.
The fact that you would love a baby with him is lovely and very natural and very normal, but if he is not ready, then chances are
you have to listen to him.
I am sorry if that hurts, but you may fall pregnant to him, only to find that he will leave you and your babies and that would be more
painful then the situation you are in right now.
Love is about giving. Always remember that.
It is about pleasing the other partner in the relationship.
Sure you must compromise but it is not about "what we can get from that other person".
I would seriously sit down and analyse whether you are
1) Just longing for a baby
2) Longing for a baby with this guy
3) Longing for a good relationship with this guy and having his
baby.
If it is a baby, that you are desiring, you really need to think long and hard.
Remember a baby needs a mom and a dad that will love him/her. It wouldn't be fair to bring a child into the world with only
one parent truly loving it.
Please give this matter some serious thought
I wish you well : )
2006-10-27 11:23:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can get your partner to 'want babies', that's something everyone has to want themselves, not at the request of their partner.
I suggest the two of you just have a good talk about it and see where you each stand. Perhaps he has changed his mind and now does not want children. If that's the case and then you go ahead anyway and have babies, won't you resent him if he's not happy about it and doesn't take much interest?
Peoples feelings/opinions about things (like having kids) can change over time, so maybe there will be a point in the future where you both feel comfortable about having a baby.
Hope that helps, good luck.
2006-10-27 11:31:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having Children has to be a joint decision and you can't make him want them if he is not ready. Have you asked him what his reservations are? If it will be his first child mabe he is scared, as you know having kids changes you're life totally. Give him time to reach this decision and make sure you both communicate openly and honestly what you are thinking and feeling. Don't force the issue it might push him further from the idea.
2006-10-27 12:41:13 · answer #4 · answered by esmequeenoftheworld 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well take your time, God knows there is enough dead beat dads in the world already. Let people make their own choices. There is no way to make somebody want to have babies. If he wante dthem in the begininng and not now maybe he is looking at your relationship differently.
Often times we want to make men do what we want them to do instead of LISTENING to what they actually said. If he doesn't want any kids right now...respect that. DON"T FORCE HIM TO. You may lose him. You have 2 children already love them as much and as hard as you can. If God blesses you with another then thank God, but if not he has already given you 2, and just be thankful.
2006-10-27 11:29:41 · answer #5 · answered by wanting to know 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can make a fuss everytime you see one. Or borrow a baby from a relative for a day and let him bond with it. Other than that, if he doesn't want kids, don't force him! You don't want a reluctant father on your hands.
2006-10-27 11:20:10 · answer #6 · answered by Christabelle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't try to force your wants and desires on someone else. Even if he gives in it won't work out. Soon you'll be divorced again with another kid to take care of.
2006-10-27 11:18:21 · answer #7 · answered by scooba 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dont push it...both of you need to be on the same page regarding children.....it's a life time decision......and if you trap him by getting pregnant on purpose you can find yourself by yourself with 3 kids. Give it time......but discuss periodically....he probably feels like your kids are his anyway...so enjoy your two children while they are young..time flies dont miss out on the best years of their lives.
2006-10-27 11:19:58 · answer #8 · answered by teaspoon520 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
don't you dare! never make someone do something as big as this unless they want to...you will be crying on here next about why your b/f has dumped you or has rejected you now that you've had the baby he has clearly stated he doesn't want! grow up!
2006-10-27 11:27:17 · answer #9 · answered by canada grl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, this is a really big mess. I don't think you should be having more kids, and you're not even married to this guy - why are you talking about kids?
2006-10-27 11:18:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋