Do you think a couple should live together before marriage?

Question

Here's the thing, I live home with my mom and a yr. ago my father passed so I don't want to leave her alone. Obviously when we get married we will, but for now I dont want to leave. So my boyfriend stays over every night and is over all the time unless he's working. Do you think thats the same? We sleep on the couch everynight because he doesnt want to disrespect my mom. So 2.5 yrs now and we've slept on a couch!!!! But its a sacrifice we take. Everyone stresses about how important it is to live together before marriage. What are your thoughts?

What I mean is living alone... just us 2

Answer 1

i think in eevry relationship, the best thing a couple can do it to be themself, any hear say can wreak that boat of relationship that is baout to be sailing on the sea of life..

so i will advise that you do what it is in your mind that will be made confortable for both of you.

since you are hoping to get marry and you dont want to leave you mother, you know that even you can still abore you mother while you marry that is if you get a bigger house that can accomodate you both and your mother..

so start today towards that dream of your together and your mother.

best of luck in your relationship

Answer 2

Absolutely not, if your roommates, it's one thing, economically speaking, but to share the same bed night after night with no formal commitment is risky. It's testing the water before you jump in. But the only thing is, it's not the same as marriage. So you really wont be testing anything. If you want to marry go ahead. If your not ready for that commitment then don't. Living together won't change anything, people that tell you otherwise are delusional. I would say you know your boyfriend very well. If he is willing to sleep on the couch for two years, it must be love.

Answer 3

confident confident confident and extra confident. stay mutually, on your individual the place issues would have a extra effective hazard at getting real. human beings would properly be mutually and chuffed for years and years then get married, pass in mutually and are depressing interior a year. Marriage isn't something extra effective than an particularly high priced peice of paper inclusive of your signatures on it, which could develop into yet another very high priced peice of paper with the comparable signatures to cancel out the 1st one. The tax motives arent even properly worth it. Love is like it doesnt ought to be made criminal to be defined. It cant be offered or offered. purchase a marriage by way of getting married and spending all that moneyon a huge celebration and textile issues to make it as specific as a danger and bypass on trip, (the vegetation die, the celebration ends, the honeymoon ends, the band is going directly to play different gigs, the clothing get hung up or shoved in a closet on no account to be worn returned, the presents get stored or used up or wreck or get upgraded in a year) sell a marriage by way of spending extra money to get divorced and all those supplies dont advise a undertaking anymore. LOVE is a reason to throw a celebration at your place whenever you decide on, and bypass on trip whenever you decide on. Proving your love by way of social standards doesnt make it real. stay mutually, as married couples do without each and every of the frills, after a year or 2 you would be content textile inclusive of your relationship, waiting to bypass away, or choose to get married. You wouldnt gulp a extraordinary drink without attempting out it first, or commit to something for the remainder of your existence while there are no ensures. i'm hoping i'm making sense.

Answer 4

I dont understand? You and your boyfriend sleep together on the couch? What is the difference on sleeping together on the couch or on your bedroom, for example? I don't quite get your point. Would it be the idea of you and your bf having sex in her house that would 'disrespect' your mom? but isnt this already happening?
Anyway I understand you dont want to leave your mother alone.
But if she will eventually have to be alone anyway after marriage... I guess you might as well move in with him now if you want that. You could keep on visiting your mom and doing things together (married or not) so that she would not feel abandoned or anything.
I personally would not want to live with a man prior to marriage cause of my particular values and believes, but everyone is entitled to do as they please.
When it comes to people stressing about how important it is to live together before, I present you a fact about divorce in the USA (if you wish you can research on the net and see it is true): the divorce rates for couple living together before marriage is much higher than those of couple who don't. My husband has lived together with both previous wives before marriage (with one of them he has lived together for as long as 6 years before marriage) and he has ended up all the same. I know lots of couples who have waited till marriage to live together and have been married all their lives long. I know people who lived together, got married and have been happily married for all their life long. I know people who have lived together cause they did not want commitment but just the good things of marriage (sex, someone to share the bills, etc), and when they found someone they really loved, they have quit their live-in gf and got married to the one they loved. So, do as your heart says. There are no warranties not even in a marriage.
You will hear just about everything from "You have to test ride a car before buying it" (about the need of living together before marriage) to "Why would one want to buy a cow that gives milk for free?" (about marrying someone you already live with).
What does REALLY feel good to you?

Answer 5

Its very important to live in YOUR OWN place together. The purpose of living together first is to see if you can handle the day-to-day routine of a marriage. It really is not reality to have your family around. So, move out with the boyfriend and see what happens.

Answer 6

Just because you don't sleep in a bed.. you are living together. Do you think your mom would feel any different if you slept together in a bed.. instead of a couch?

Answer 7

it depends on how you were raised for one. i was raised no sex before marriage, but i found my mr. right and did anyway. he and i have been married 12 years now. i think it's a good idea to live together first because you learn more about each other and habits before hand. so there's no surprises. but it depends on the couple.

Answer 8

I would say yes you can but... but ....
Its should not be so casual as most of the people have said here.
Well personally I would keep some distance...
Yes I would keep some beautiful things in life come when it has to come..these things wait...
Believe me I would not ask my gal to live with me even if she says she doesn't mind... Little old fashioned?? hmmm... well call whatever... but i have seen these relations like this..and didnot find beauty and the passion in them ... when they actually tied the knot... :-)

Answer 9

I think it helps to live with someone first....you have time to get used to the quirks and learn how to live with that person before you commit. I lived with my husband for 3 years before we married.

Answer 10

No definite answer... Really depends on the ppl and their beliefs and values. You should sit down with the other person and talk about the good and bad parts of that decision.