that way,people keep telling me its not influence or enviorment,that their born this way.then why do men and women live almost their entire life straight then find out after 10 or 20 years of marriage they are suddenly attracted to the same sex and become gay or lesbian or bi. u cant tell me their life straight was a lie and they were just hiding their feelings, somehting obviously went wrong physically or mentally to direct them this way ,it may be normal in their mind to be gay but i dont think its natural and they need help the only people who condon being gay are people who are gay,or people like parents who are forced to condon it to keep their kids love so i ask again is being gay more by influence?
2006-10-27 02:42:42 · 22 answers · asked by fluffy 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
It is a fact that people will hide their sexuality due to the social pressures placed on them by ignorant people.
The fact that homosexuallity is not accepted and those who are homosexual are criticized, ostrasized, and in some cases phisically harmed is enough to make anyone hide there true nature,
2006-10-27 02:49:04 · answer #1 · answered by The Eight Ball 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Yeah it's something you're born as. This society we live in puts so much pressure on how people are supposed to be that it's hard to even identify yourslef. When people try to life their life as a lie it's really taxing on the person's soul. You know that the day is gonna be littered with lies, but you have to do it or else your life could be over, (family, friends, job, everything). It's never fair that so many people in this world are quick to point the finger and condemn someone for circumstances that are against their control. What if everyone began attacking people with Hazel eyes, because they aren't average? Sure they could have chose to get contacts and become hazel, but what if you were born that way? Would you accept your fate, or go and change your eye color and "live the lie". True, some people do get sick of all the hassle with dealing with the whole stupid games that the opposite sex plays, and they'll just become same sex. But the fact of the matter remains that there are just people who prefer to spend their lives with their own sex, and have prefered from birth, and nothing can or ever will change that. Get a life and leave those that are happy (gay) with their lives alone. Eventually the ones that are living a lie will realize the error of their foley and stop lying to the ones they love, especially themselves. Wheew! that took a while. By the way I'm straight, but I have this weird disease called Empathy. I hope you catch it.
2006-10-27 03:03:14 · answer #2 · answered by Johnny Afman 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Appropriate screen name because your logic is kinda fluffy too.
Human sexuality is not an either/or, on/off proposition; there are shades of grey. Kinsey explained it with his scale: 1 meaning totally straight and 6 meaning totally gay. But there are a lot of 2s, 3s, 4s and 5s out there with varying experiences of both genders.
Yes, some people live lifetimes in denial, or unaware of their feelings for the same gender, and then realize it one day. I've had many friends who were married to the opposite gender and then discovered this aspect about themselves.
There are many, many, many people who accept gays and lesbians who aren't their parents. I've got many straight friends who have no problem with my life, and I have no problem with theirs. I'm what they call a "Gold Star Gay" or a Kinsey 6 - never been with a woman and never wanted to be. Its just the way I am and I recall these feelings from when I was very young.
Others have given you pretty much the same answer. If you don't want to accept it, that's your choice. But it doesn't alter my reality one little bit. The most telling sentence revealing your prejudicial opinions is: "it may be normal in their mind to be gay but i dont think its natural". In other words, no matter what anyone answers to your question, you won't change your mind.
2006-10-27 03:01:18 · answer #3 · answered by dougeebear 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How can it be influence when I was the only gay I knew before I came out? It's not so much that people hide their feelings (some do), but it's more, well for me anyway, it's more like I knew something was wrong but I thought I just had a low sex drive or something... turns out I have a good sex drive, it's just for the same sex...
2006-10-27 10:24:11 · answer #4 · answered by Phedre D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a matter of self-acceptance.
It's not a "sudden" thing at all.
I was married to a man, but I didn't "Suddenly" become attracted to women. I was ALWAYS attracted to women as well as men.
Peer pressure and society FORCED me to believe my attractions were wrong and if I lived as if I was straight I would eventually loose my attractions to women.
But, I found out that it simply doesn't work that way.
You can't change your sexuality. You can ONLY change your behaviors.
My purely heterosexual behaviors went against what I was naturally. I created terribly self-destructive feelings and behaviors.
Only once I learned to accept myself for who I was was I able to break free of the self-destructive behaviors and learn to love myself!
NO, of course you don't believe being gay is natural FOR YOU, that's because you're not gay.
But I don't believe being fully-straight is natural...FOR ME. Because I'm not fully-straight.
I'm bisexual, with a strong leaning toward being lesbian.
That's what's normal and natural...FOR ME.
My parents never had gay/lesbian friends, that they knew of.
I didn't have gay/lesbian friends growing up.
We didn't live in a paticularly "liberal" area, my hometown was fairly conservative minded.
I wasn't "recruited" or "influenced" by someone or something. It's just who I am.
2006-10-27 03:30:33 · answer #5 · answered by DEATH 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
IF U R NOT GAY u could never understand .your question is silly try living in a world that hates u .and when u r young try not to be different and then strive to be the same ...even all the way to marriage to woman... just to find out sex is sex but its the feeling of this is where i should be that matters nothing else......if the world was opposite of what it is now ..how would u handle it ...the same way i was married to a woman and that was how it went .......so a sickness no ...don't comment on what u dont know.....................
2006-10-27 06:36:56 · answer #6 · answered by eric d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow! what a question.
I'm certainly no expert. I know gay couples. Obviously hetero too. I am a Christian. I also don't shun my gay friends, or try to "convert", and they too understand my solid belief that homosexuality is a sin. Also, these couples realize my kids are too young to understand their relationships. So, for now its kept mum.
So! based on my experiences, and theirs, let me say this.......
I truly believe some are born this way.
I believe some choose this behavior based on a number of possibilities. (rebellion, bad experience w/ the opposite sex, sexual child abuse)
Society has not helped those that may wish to be acknowledged.
Thus, some may announce later in life that they are gay.
Also, not all gays are anxious to wave the rainbow flag if ya' know what I mean. They just want to quietly go about their lives.
No solid answer, I know. But thought what I've experienced might help.
2006-10-27 03:00:21 · answer #7 · answered by <><><> 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you need a lesson in Biology.
It is something they are born with. I can give one example:
A couple I know has 4 children, and the fourth is gay. She was that way from the time she could walk and could show preference toward anything. She insisted on dressing like a boy, and just acted more like a boy than a girl. Now that she is in her teens, she may sometimes wear a long skirt (as many in our religion do), but she still has on walking shoes, a Butch haircut, and a tee shirt that is not at all feminine. And, she was born that way.
2006-10-27 02:53:25 · answer #8 · answered by Shossi 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Wow! You have some really twisted ideas, Fluffy. Are you questioning your own sexuality? Hmmm...I AM GAY BECAUSE GOD MADE ME THIS WAY! It's a small part of who I am, but not the only part. Fortunately for me, I didn't have to pretend I was "straight" to fit into society. Many of my friends didn't have this same path. It took them years to find the courage to be themselves.And being Gay is more acceptable now than it was years ago. We are more vocal. We are more political. We are advocates for change. We are a power to be reckoned with.
2006-10-27 05:52:11 · answer #9 · answered by auntgnu62 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
People are born gay.
Some people conceal their orientation for many years in an attempt to fit into a predominately straight culture. Some may even have themselves convinced that if they suppress themselves enough, they may be able to completely assimilate. I think those people are lying to themselves, and that is a shame.
It is normal and natural to be gay. Our sexual orientation is centered in our brain, not our sex organs. A woman who has had her reproductive organs removed due to cancer is still a woman, is she not? Her "womanness" is in her head, not her uterus. Our gender identity is formed in our brains before we are born.
There are instances of homosexuality in the animal kingdom as well. It has been observed in bird and primates that I have read of, at least.
Not a choice. Simply part of who a person is. Not the *only* part, but an important one.
2006-10-27 02:49:39 · answer #10 · answered by Chickyn in a Handbasket 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋