I have notice that people respond the same way ,then move away fast.WhY ? i'm i boring ? ugly ? smelly ? i take shower ,daily ! even my family, they are nice, but their conversation are brief.What's wrong ???? I'm i meant to be alone ? Is this my destiny ?Maybe, it was meant to happen like this ? Maybe that is what GOD wants ? I want to feel loved,appreciated. People even tell me , i'm so nice. Even guys, are nice, BUT i notice they don't want to be next to me.HELP ME PLEASE ! With your MOST honest OPiNiOn ,please ! tHANks !
2006-10-27 01:50:03 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Well what are you doing when you notice they don't want to be next to you?
2006-10-27 01:55:50 · answer #1 · answered by angeleyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like a couple of things could be happening. One may be your body language, you may think your being open and friendly but your body stance or gestures may be sending another signal. The other thing is you may appear needy, trying too hard to make friends. Stop and look at yourself the next time you talking to someone, think about what your body is saying. I had the same problem and still do to an extent. I feel I am very friendly, but people tell me that they are scared of me because I look so stern and hard to approach. No one is meant to be alone, if you work on certain things about your body language and expressions someone will find you more interesting and want to be around you. Good luck.
2006-10-27 01:58:48 · answer #2 · answered by loser 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough one. I don't have enough info to really give you a great answer, but there are certain individuals that make me cringe, despite them being nice. Why? Here are some reasons I avoid some people:
1. The ME problem: They are wrapped up in themselves and don't listen or ask about other people. It is all about them.
2. The TALKERS: They talk too much and overwhelm me, making me want to avoid them. They talk, talk, talk, can't get to the point, beat a point to death, give eight million details about insignificant issues that I couldn't care-a-less about, etc.
3. Inability to listen: The conversation is one-sided. Again, it is all about them, them, them. Very annoying, irritating.
4. Vampires: They are needy and need lots of encouragement, praise, etc. They wear me out. They always have a crisis and are child-like in wanting me to make them feel good. They whine, they complain, they are victims. I don't like victims.
Things I LIKE about people:
1. Caring/empathetic: People who ask questions, listen to the answers, clarify, and don't turn the conversation back to be all about them.
2. People who are confident and don't suffocate me by being needy, demanding of my attention and time.
3. People who can carry on an equal conversation, without either saying nothing at all or dominating it.
4. People who see humor in things and are encouraging, not negative.
5. People who do not need constant reassurance.
6. People willing to see the other side of things, but who have their own opinions.
I guess that's the sum of it. Slow down, take a deep breath and consider just asking someone to be honest and explain why you are annoying. It is probably just a behavior that you can change.
Watch their body language. If you are with someone and they step back, stop talking, start losing eye contact, you are doing something that is breaking the bonds. If you watch them, you will soon be able to see what behaviors you are exhibiting that is turning them off.
Fair enough? There are a lot of sites on the net about social skills. I imagine that is where the problem is. Check it out and see if you see yourself. Then you can stop the behavior so people can enjoy the lovable, nice you! Best of luck.
2006-10-27 02:05:51 · answer #3 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This tough to answer since you don't give any details about yourself..Look at yourself outwardly and ask?? Do I like the way I look? Listen to yourself talk? Do I talk funny/stupid say weird things? Now look at yourself inwardly and ask Do I feel good about myself? Can I personally do something to become a better person..If you can answer these question and come up with a logical positive answers that you like..Then there is nothing wrong with you..you need to do something to become more intersting learn and educate yourself in whatever you choose and be the best at it..others will take notice and most likely be more receptive to you..No guarantees just my opinion..Good Luck, Stay cool. Life it to short to worry about the little stuff there are people in this world that do/will find you interesting .
2006-10-28 07:40:25 · answer #4 · answered by flashrtp 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about what they think or do and no that's not what god wants he would never want anyone to be alone stop trying so hard they do it because the get you to react if someone moves away from you then just start talking to someone else like you were done talking to then any way and were getting bored and being nice soon they will figure out they are not going to get you to react and they will stop and you can talk to me and my friends any time.
2006-10-27 01:59:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As I do not know you or cannot see you, I am unable to give you a truly honest answer to what your problem may be.
The only people that can give you an honest answer are those who have personal contact with you.
However, I can make a suggestion, and that is the only way you are going to discover what your problem is, is to be honest and tell one of your family members your problem and ask them to answer truthfully.
This suggestion may be hard or embarrassing for you to do, but I think it will be worth it.
Have courage and good luck.
2006-10-27 02:16:04 · answer #6 · answered by Ally 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you are just too preoccupied about what people think of you..
Just relax and be yourself. As the old cliche' goes, we can't please everyone. Don't be obsessed about what impression u make on others. It will only disappoint you. Many people don't really care if you are nice or not.
In life honey, being nice isn't enough. You have to assert yourself and let people know what u like and what you don't like. Get mad if you're angry. Don't be too nice to suppress the real you.
2006-10-27 01:58:56 · answer #7 · answered by hello 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, Perhaps you are sending off a"needy" vibe. People get turned off, scared by that.
Just relax, try to be calm and confidant. Sometimes it would be good if YOU were the one to walk away first!
Don't make yourself so available-say "oh, I have to run, I'm meeting someone, have an appointment"
I hope this is a help to you. Please don't stress about it, it will be ok.
2006-10-27 02:00:04 · answer #8 · answered by Fresherson19 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever asked any of your friendsa for their take on it? How about your family? At least they could be honest with you. Maybe it's not you at all, maybe it's the people you have been hanging out with. It's hard to say. I'm sorry you arer going through this.
2006-10-27 01:59:22 · answer #9 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek out a therapist to get to the bottom of it. It may just be a matter of perception or perhaps there is something...but no one wants to tell you. Dont take it personal. Work on it for yourself. See what comes up.
2006-10-27 01:55:08 · answer #10 · answered by Steph 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What others think of you does not really reflects your own true self so don't panic. Maybe you should check yourself and self analysis. Maybe there are other aspects that makes them not want you. So check on yourself and see the true reason for your problem.
2006-10-27 02:23:38 · answer #11 · answered by gel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋