hiya..you see I only lost all my self respect with him, cos the guy was my bestfriend, we used to spend all our time together and not get bored, it kinda freaked us out. That lead to us being in a relationship, a really good one. Then obviously his insecurities messed us up. I told him i didnt wanna play games because self pride and ego shouldnt come into it, and lifes too short to be playing games. I wanted him to value our riendship more than anything, and thats wat i wanted back..but he ignores me constantly, an the worse thing is I know he's probably laughing at me making a fool out of myself over and over again!!! I just want him to realise wat he's lost. will he ever?..thanx.. (slight addition on details to previous question)..he wasnt just a boyfriend, he was my bestfriend. I love him so much.
2006-10-27 01:36:12 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
after all the chasing, is it possible to get my self respect back, and for him to want me again?or is it too late?..xx
2006-10-27 05:42:47 · update #1
it`s his loss!! relationships come and go but a good friend is a must have!!xx
2006-10-27 01:39:54 · answer #1 · answered by nicola 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I was involved in really good relationship, where we spent most of all our time together too. The relationship came to an end and when it did it hurt more to me, because this man was my best friend as well as a boyfriend. I don't know how old you are but if you are dealing with a grown man then he should realize on his on what he has lost, you shouldn't have to probe that out of him, especially if he valued the friendship as much as you do. I know that in my situation is was my ex-bf who messed up but he tells me all the time how much he misses me and misses our friendship and would do anything to get it back, I know that all people are different and don't handle situations the same way anymore but it seems like this guy of yours is acting really immature, maybe sense the relationship is over he does not want to have a friendship and just wants to leave things as they are, if I were you I would make one last attempt to see where he is coming from and how he feels, sense it seems like you really miss the friendship and feel like its worth saving. If he still ignores you then I would just leave it alone. Good luck.
2006-10-27 08:50:10 · answer #2 · answered by Thandie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's funny how we're probably on different continents but experiencing the same issue, over and over again. my former best friend was like a boyfriend (mine is in australia) to me. he did everything a boyfriend should (except the intimacy) for about two years. i took his niceness to be a natural trait and we went everywhere and did everything together. however, when he realized that my boyfriend and i are serious, he freaked out and became uncharacteristically nasty. things got ugly and sad to say, though we are finally on speaking terms, we'll never be the same again. i guess my advice is let things be. a lot of men i know aren't very good with handling emotions and tend to lash out to prove their invulnerability. i think if he feels the relationship is worth salvaging, he will come around. give him time and just reduce contact with him in the meantime. you seem like a really nice girl, don't beat yourself up over his immaturity. in fact, forward him the url of this webpage. maybe he'll come to his senses then.
2006-10-27 09:24:21 · answer #3 · answered by janicebks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
relationships are comlicated sometimes, if things were going so well and then you got together as more than friends it may not have been as easy as he thought to deal with the situation of you two being a couple, especialy if he was as insecure as you say he was. i know my best friend is a woman and she knows me inside out, back to front, upside down and all the way round again and i know her just as well too but theres a fine line between being best friends and actually being a couple and i wouldnt want to cross that line with her.
your a different person with your parents, your boss or the lads/girls on a night out or your best friend or arent you? and so you could act slightly differently with your girlfriend/boyfriend no matter what sort of relationship you had before you started dating...even if its a subconscious thing. the thing is if my friend and i did step over the line she'd know me and Know me if you get what i mean. i know she knows i think she's attractive and everything but theres no way id want to trade in what we've got right now for anything.
by the sounds of it your bloke thought he could deal with crossing that line but when push came to shove he couldnt. thats possibly one tiny aspect of him that he tried not to show to you but still worked its way out which is unfortunate. its probably a daft way to put it i know but thats my look on the situation but if you had as good a relationship as you say maybe he'll come back n try to salvage that. if not then thats life unfortunately. give him some space, go out with the girls, eat some chocolate or summink but dont keep picking at the scab that is a failed relationship
2006-10-27 09:22:35 · answer #4 · answered by Andy S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to him how you feel and sit back and wait for any reaction, you cannot demand that someone loves you, as long as he knows how much you thought of him. He may not realise what he has lost until you stop running after him, he probably thinks its funny at the moment but once you stop running he may run to you. Dont do anything foolish like beg him he is not worth it good luck.
2006-10-27 08:48:13 · answer #5 · answered by Kirks Folley 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well hun it sounds to me like its his loss - you sound like a really good friend and he WILL miss you trust me - it may not be until this time next year - but it will hit him on what hes missing out on.
he sounds like a jerk with the way hes carrying on so my advice to you is to ignore him - absence makes the heart grow fonder - when he realises you're not up for playing games anymore - he might cop on to what hes after loosing a lot quicker. xx
2006-10-27 08:47:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Goodness what's all this about? If he was truly your best friend then he wouldnt be ignoring you. Stop making a fool of yourself and move on. He may realise what he's lost, he may not. You can't make him realise it by wishing.
2006-10-27 08:40:22 · answer #7 · answered by Caroline 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had a girlfriend dat i was preety close wid aswelll, den she asked me if i wanted to take it further and be boyfriend and girlfriend, den i asked her out. as soon as i asked her out she acted like a total ***** and was embarassed of me in front of her friends, she didnt want them knowing dat we were together. i tried so hard to make it work, coz i genuinly liked her, but she was acted so weird. so in the end we broke up. it took some time but i got over her, u should try to aswell, i know you loved him, but he aint worth it if u cant speak to him properly or have a meaningful realtionship with him. we knew each other for 4 years den we went out 6 months ago, but it really didnt work. someone else will come along, dnt bother with him, he aint worth it. da one dat i dated wasnt either.
2006-10-27 08:54:36 · answer #8 · answered by blu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW! missed last question ,What does it take these days before someone realises what a fool they have been & will be wanting you back?beats me?
2006-10-27 08:41:59 · answer #9 · answered by edison 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is his loss. you sound like a very nice girl. and i think a nice boy will come a long don't put up with the ones that are not life is to short
2006-10-27 08:52:20 · answer #10 · answered by debbie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋