I got married in the year 2002 it was love *** arrange intercast marriage,what i feel his mom doesn't like me even i dont want to stay with her but husband cant stay without his mom,my is not getting a good job as he always wanted to do a business,so i am working from past four years,now finally he started 6months back with my mama and mama is saying get out as he also utilised us ,now my husband again will be just sitting at home with his mom (which i dont like atall)
we also donot have oue house we are staying with an old lady.
what do do moreover i am unable to concieve,
so there is no hope in my life,is there any pointof living and staying with my husband as i am a qualifiedgirl working in MNC earning around 25 thousand per month. pls. suggest i am very depressed today.
2006-10-26 18:21:09 · 18 answers · asked by i m ur fren 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You sound miserable & do not need to stay in the situation you are in. If you are financially able to leave your husband and emotionally ready to do it go ahead & get out now.
2006-10-26 18:24:13 · answer #1 · answered by Michelle *The Truth Hurts 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Sounds painful and more than that very unfortunate. It was a love marriage and probably you two decided that. So you two should honour your decision; discuss your mutual problems and try to stay together. I understand that a lot of issues have been clubbed together. Your mom and his mom at this point are not very important; your mutual issues are. So just ignore them and do not try to mend their ways or disturb your peace over that.
As far as he is concerned, I am yet to conclude that he is not willing to work as you have not furnished details. If that is the case and he is not getting right opportunities, you must try to support him to find a suitable job/business opportunity.
If it is a matter of habit that he does not want to work, you are already in command. You are earning a handsome amount. Impress upon him; give him a fair chance to improve and if he does not, just talk about your options to leave him.
I do not find any reasons that you should be unhappy about your financial status. Rs.25000/- per month is a good income and believe me families stay happy even in half or one-fourth of that.
The situation needs to be handled in an obective and firm manner. You know him batter and you had married him for certain qualities. Concentrate upon him; manage the situation not people around you.
Wish you GOOD LUCK.
You could e-mail me at: sharma.kulbhushan@yahoo.co.in
2006-10-27 05:06:28 · answer #2 · answered by sharma.kulbhushan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are trapped in this house real bad.i say be very careful while dealin with all this.just tell your husband that you are visitin your home for a while.then when you return call him to your house for one day.that day threaten him to his face that you are willing to give him one last chance to make his career and live a respectable life.tell him that you are fed up of his way of life and he is nothin more than a loser.my guess is that he will get threatened and either bcom voilent or start working to prove himself.if he has the smalles self respect left in him he will start working.tell him that you have lost all respect for him hwich you really have.also tell him that you feel unwell and smothered in his house.you are an educated woman of teh 21st century earning the dream salary.get yourself a seperate rented house and live your life.take care of your security also and as for the not bein able to concieve part.go see a doctor.if you really cant then go for adoption and then you will realise that life is beautiful.bcoz the truth is that we women dont need men as much as they need us.if you husband really loves you he will fight all odds to get you back.if he does not then he will find another victim like you!now god forbid but if he goes for the latter option of findin another girl then its your job to protect her.we humans are responsible for our own unhappiness.u r strong independent and a very powerful woman.so i guess you should use all this!good luck
2006-10-27 03:07:00 · answer #3 · answered by s4e 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all you are making extremely good money on 25,000 per month i dont understand why you dont have your own house,first of all work on one step ata time,leave your husbund and go rent out your own unit or house,then go from there,as far as having a child goes when the time is right you will be ready to concieve could be gods way of telling you now is not the time because of this selfish man you are with do you really want a baby to him be thankfull you havent conceieved yet and you can re start your life and find your real true love
2006-10-27 01:31:40 · answer #4 · answered by treatau 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
love and likeness cannot be bred, it comes spontaneously, or it doesnt. period. in ur mom-in-law's case it just doesnt exist. so forget about cultivating it. n ur husband shud also understand this. he can love his mom but he has to respect ur feelings too. and if u r past that stage whr he cn be impressed upon as to y he must work n work out a way so that u do nt feel depressed n vain, thn i suggest u move out before it is too late. n nt having a child in this case cud be a blessing in disguise.
take care, cheers
2006-10-27 03:23:13 · answer #5 · answered by popree p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
trust me , men are not worth it . When you feel down start thinking positive and not negative your life is so important . Whether you are happy or not . What I would do is get a seperation and make him understand it's his mom or you . if you know you can make it on your own stay strong and become someone in life take care of yourself if he isn't. you are worth more . God Bless You
2006-10-27 02:07:42 · answer #6 · answered by Denise B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There always hope in our life. Just leave him and start a new one. You can have a husband earn less than you but not one, who is sitting around waiting for milk to flow into his mouth. God bless you.
2006-10-27 02:16:38 · answer #7 · answered by Cindy L 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
U live only once. Make the most of it, things will change for the better and life is not all that bad. Look at all the brighter side of life. Take care my dear. sunny
2006-10-27 01:24:58 · answer #8 · answered by sundeep s 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
first of all do't be self suggestive-(no hope in life)this might b bad but have to be brave n keep on trying.i tell u all bad phases have to end some end quickly some take time.your phase has to end,keep that faith n it's true.try to talk to your hubby.make some targets not long targets,small targets with short time limitations.KEEP FAITH THINGS HAVE TO CHANGE.CHANGE IS LIFE.
2006-10-27 04:23:07 · answer #9 · answered by ankur m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave the things on time, time will cure everything. Happy with the things which you have. Don't get depressed. Be cool
2006-10-28 01:26:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋