This is a poem I wrote about 2 years ago; I was looking thru a box of stuff and found it; my friend had published it in her monthly newsletter. You'll find themes about God, as I am a Christian. Thoughts on it? Do you like it? Thanks! :-)
"June"
Sol raises his golden head
from pillow of cloud and azure bed
Stately pines, emerald bedecked
at passing winds do genuflect
mounted on their greening slopes
gems in an airy kaleidoscope
water white, a crashing rebel
against its rocks and nomad pebbles
June in all her flawless glamour
makes my common senses clamor
splendor of the departing spring
giving my heart the desire to sing
the praises of our Creator Lord
Whose adoration my strength affords
And worship to the Only One
Who makes the sky, the earth, and sun
Can we who witness this be still
And not the earth His praises fill?
Perish the thought the rocks cry out
And nature rob the privilege to shout
The honor of our God and King
Let us give our hearts' offerings.
2006-10-26 16:15:09 · 4 answers · asked by peachy78 5 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Other - Arts & Humanities
I like this poem, it definitely has substance. It brings forth an awareness of God's might, his creation. Just this evening I stopped to view the horizon. Solid stripes of Red at the bottom, next a broad stripe of white, topped by a broad stripe of blue. God's handiwork's can not be matched.No greater canvass is there to admire. Such is depicted in this poem. God Bless
2006-10-26 16:26:35 · answer #1 · answered by Sage 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good effort....some good images...however the overall carriage stumbles in parts...do not sacrifice the cadence for big words....they get in the way of the flow that you had set in motion....thus it becomes choppy and loses it's fluidity.
"...water...a crashing rebel
against it's rocks and nomad pebbles..." excellent imagery! sublime!
overall: Needs 'tweaking.' (moments of talent shine through in spots.)
2006-10-26 20:53:52 · answer #2 · answered by Pie's_Guy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not usually a person that's into peoms and stuff like that nut I love it I think it's the best one I'v ever heard!!! (HONEST TRUTH)
2006-10-26 16:25:20 · answer #3 · answered by ~♥~Tiffany~♥~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow thats good ima poet too :P
2006-10-26 16:23:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋