I was going to get an abortion, but I reconsidered, did I make the right choice?

Question

I walked in there and they were pressuring me, like they had things to do, but I got up and chickened out.
I don't think I could go through with it.
But I don't know what to do or if I'm ready to be a parent.
Did I make the right choice?
Would they schedule me a new appointment or be mad at me for running out?

Answer 1

Sweetie, first off you have to realize this is a personal decision that only you can make, you can not be pressured by pro-choice or pro-life, that is not what we are here about.
I don't know how old you are but the fact that you stated you were not ready to be a parent said quite a bit. If it starts out hard, and you are alone or with the wrong person, it is very hard.
I am looking at this from to sides, both of which I experienced. When I was 15 I was raped by a boyfriend that was much older, I was a virgin and had no idea that I was playing with fire. Well, I got pregnant..I did not even have to tell my mother, I just asked if there was any other reason a girl would miss her period other than being pregnant and that was it. The next day I was in school and the principal showed up, took me out of class and there in the office was my mother and my oldest brother who was home on leave from Vietnam. They took me to the family doctor( This was 1969 and he performed a therapuetic abortion but they did not call it that. I was told we would never discuss it again, and to pretend that it did not happen., period. I carried that with me my entire life, I still think about it. The decision was taken from me and made by someone else, I had no say in the matter. I could have given the child up for adoption, but that was not an option. Do I regret that, yes..I could not be a parent but I should have had the right to give birth to the child. There will be people that will want to take that decision away from you also and you should not let them do that, you have to live with it. When I was 19 I became pregnant with my daughter whom I had and two years later I had my son. I married their father which later ended in divorce but I would not change one thing about having my two wonderful children. They are now adults and I am so proud of them I could just burst. I guess what I am trying to say is that it does not alway have to do with age, it has to do with what you are ready for. I have a feeling since you walked out of the clinic that you were not sure that is what you wanted, am I right or were you scared of the procedure? Did you make the right choice, I would say right then at that moment you did because you made the conscious decision to leave. I feel every woman has the right to make that choice as long as it is not used time and again like birth control but I sure don't get the feeling that is the case with you. I think you have some deep soul searching to do. Once you are a parent, you are a parent for the rest of your life, there is no taking a break..I wish I knew more about you but I feel you will make the right choice for you. There are also many people that want to adopt a baby so that is another option..I would suggest before you do anything that you get ahold of family planning or whatever they have now and talk to some people who can give you some advice, NON POLITICAL,,advice, and see how you feel about it then.
You sound like a sweet girl or you would not be struggling with this so hard..Do not carry around guilt , shame for the rest of your life no matter what you decide..You have a whole life out there left to live and don't forget that, OK..But do go and see someone who can talk to you face to face please.
Blessings, OM
Magnolia

Answer 2

“But we were being careful!” “I was on the pill.” “How could this happen?” If you find yourself pregnant unexpectedly, you’re likely anxious about the future. Couples who use birth control and still conceive face a situation that calls for thoughtful consideration. Perhaps you’re secretly thrilled about the pregnancy but your spouse hates the idea; maybe you’re alone and not ready to be a single mom; maybe you didn’t want any more kids — whatever the scenario, this new life is depending on you to make wise decisions. The next few months can be full of regret and remorse or they can be full of excitement and anticipation. Which will you choose?





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Answer 3

there is not any suggestion that Dr Downes is making an attempt to emphasize her opinion on absolutely everyone. Her career is all about saving lives (in case absolutely everyone has forgotten, they take the Hippocratic oath), and her concerns are also for the welfare of the mummy, besides because the unborn newborn. judgements about existence and shortage of existence might want to no longer be made lower than emotional stress - such concerns call for actual recommendations and time to contemplate. I applaud Dr Downes specialist approach. a number of people (who've by no skill had an abortion) fail to comprehend the psychological damage finished to the female who has taken a call to terminate a being pregnant. She has to stay with that for some thing else of her existence. If women people were given better help with the intention to address the upbringing of a young person (despite the undeniable fact that the youngster isn't planned or perhaps undesirable), there will be fewer abortions executed. We relish freedom of concept, and freedom of action. Dr Harris is loose to table an change allowing nurses to finish abortions with out supervision through a clinical specialist. Dr Downes might want to likewise be prolonged a similar courtesy to have freedom to act in accordance to her experience of authentic and incorrect.

Answer 4

The fact that you reconsidered and couldn't go through with it should tell you you weren't ok with going through with it. You're the only one who knows if you did the right thing, but chickening out should tell you something about how you feel.

Maybe you're not ready to be a mother, but you can get ready. You can ask for help if you need it.

The people at the abortion place are probably very used to having women chicken out. They understand and are probably not at all angry at you. They may, though, think you aren't a good candidate for abortion; and they may possibly not set up another appointment for that reason. I honestly don't think, though, they'd refuse an appointment because they're "mad" at you. They understand.

Answer 5

Becoming a parent is a huge decision and noone is ever really 'ready' for it, no matter what they say. Take some time to think about how this will affact your life, before you rush into any decisions. Maybe you should talk this over with someone as well. Do you have any family that you can go to with this? I hope you have at least some friends who will give you support.

As long as you think you can be emotionally and financially responsible for another life, then have the baby and good luck to you. But if you are really not up to the challenge, then you should consider abortion or adoption.

Don't try to go through this alone and above all else, listen to your heart. Other people's opinions aside, you are the one that has to live with yourself.

Good luck :-)

Answer 6

I believe you made the right choice. the termination of another life is very difficult to do because you don't know how things would have turned out. If you don't believe you are ready to be a parent, you can always give up the baby for adoption. But you have a lot of time to give it some though and get some training in being a parent.

Answer 7

You should do what you think is right for you. Don't worry about them being mad or acting rude. Really, would you bring a new child into this world just because someone is mad? Re-schedule your appointment, think again, and decide what is best for you. When the time of the appointment comes, you can go for it or you can cancel, but please schedule it now.

If you think you can't go through with an abortion cause someone was rude to you, do you think you can go through with giving birth in a few months? They will be just as rude...

Think what is the best for your life right now, a year from now, 2 years from now. What is your plan. Try and play both scenarios in your head. Pick one. This is what important, not the stupid people at the clinic.

Keep in mind that this website is full of pro-life people, they will tell you to keep the baby no matter what.

Answer 8

You can give the baby up for adoption and make some family VERY happy !! Thinking of someone other than yourself in this particular situation can guide you to a loving decision !

Be strong and soon 9 months will have passed and you will have only memories to look back on.

Answer 9

If you r underage please let someone u trust know. Follow ur heart, only u can decide if u made the right choice. If right now u decide okay " I will keep the baby" but u change ur mind please do not do nothing laim like have the baby and put it in a trash can. Keep in mind that baby is human just like u and me. There are many options like adoption, Or u can most definitely have the baby and take he/she to a hospital,police station,fire dept with no questions asked u can safely leave the baby there. Good Luck!! Remember "BIRTHCONTROL" "CONDOMS" Jusdt to be on the safe side..

Answer 10

They shouldn't have pressured you, they should have given you room to change your mind. (I'm pro-choice, and I believe they should give a woman whatever she needs to make her choices) If you don't want an abortion, you can choose to become a parent, or to put your child up for adoption. You aren't sentenced to motherhood if you carry your child to term. However, you are then responsible for taking the best care possible of yourself and your unborn child for those months (no drinking, smoking, etc.).
If there's no one at the clinic you can speak to, look into a crisis/help hotline, or talk to a friend you can trust if you don't have a close family member you can go to.
This is a decision you won't be able to change, so be sure it's the right one for you.