we've been separated about 5 and a half months.would this be wise or will it only cause problems? we still talk and still care about each other(i still have feelings for him,but don't need a relationship with him right now)what to do?
2006-10-26 14:19:17 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Its very common although not healthy. You need to have some ground rules
Are the visits to rekindle your relationship
Is it purely for sex
Is it just as friends
If your not clear on this one of you will get hurt. Not to mention while this is going on your not moving on.
2006-10-26 14:23:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Speaking from experience, it is never a good idea to have sex with the ex. They are an ex for a reason, regardless of how well the physical aspect of things was. Think about it, if you two were to become intimate again, if there is anything in his heart or head telling him you two may get back together, it would lead him on in a big way. If you still care about this man, don't do that to him. As far as your feelings for him go, I'm sure there will always be a place in your heart for him, since the two of you were married and shared a very deep bond. But since you are separated, sex is never a good idea. It will only make things confused and make any situation worse. Good luck!
2006-10-26 14:25:36 · answer #2 · answered by slowfreak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The real question is: "do you want closure" of the relationship or just want to change it?
If you are after closure then any contact will only prolong the healing process. If you still like each other but just don't want to be married anymore (for whatever reason) then why not continue to enjoy each others company.. However, you must each understand that eventually one of you will find someone else to share life with and closure will most certainly take place then.
2006-10-26 14:29:33 · answer #3 · answered by gjm 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am going thru the same thing, It will only get worse if you give him or her sex!! If you are sure you want the divorce you have to let your mind and your heart heal all the way and if you still have sex with him or her, you are only opening the door to the emotions that you felt when you first separated. I only found it harder to let him go if I still gave him the sex, I thought maybe things would change and get better if we could attach back those emotions when having sex but It didn't and now I am the fool. Just dint do it unless you want to get back together. If not sure about getting back together, JJJJJUUUUSSSTTTT dint do it..
2006-10-26 14:29:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The purpose of a separation is for one to evaluate a relationship and even explore other options, I think it would be a bad idea to have sex during a separation too confusing
2006-10-26 14:21:59 · answer #5 · answered by snoop_dougie_doug04 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its bad idea, you are confusing the whole separation issue.but in the other hand you guys can be a booty call...that way when you have the sex drive you know who to call........but if you guys think this is good for a long run you are wrong....if sex doesn't bring you two together just get divorce its not worth it...
2006-10-26 15:33:21 · answer #6 · answered by Jazzy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are trying to stay seperated, then being sexually involved is not a good idea. You may re-awaken old feelings and it could be uglier than it was (or is). Does he still have feelings for you too? If you don't want to be in a relationship with him and he still does, sex may really complicate issues for him too. Good luck!
2006-10-26 14:25:42 · answer #7 · answered by lyrical 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, a married man and woman that are separated can still have sex. I have been there, done that. Sometimes it was fun.
2006-10-26 15:31:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is possible if you still care about each other. You both must understand and accept that it is only sex, nothing else. We are not getting back together etc.
2006-10-26 14:27:50 · answer #9 · answered by loveseat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go with the flow and learn to be ok with the way it is, who told you realtionshipt was supposed to "look" a particular way anyway? it is the way it is , can you learn to be ok with that, and stop trying to manipulate it according to cultural myth or religious dogma to be somthing else? Now you know why you have problems!
2006-10-26 14:24:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋