Ok.. this is all really complicated. Basically i was with my ex boyfriend for a year, we split up due to his insecurities, he thort I had cheated..then he accused me off cheating..then he told me he had cheated..but I realised he didnt and had only sed it to hurt me and to make me hate him. We've been split for 4 months, and i feel i have lost all self-respect because i have practically been pathetic toward him..He says he's not over me, n i know he hasnt experienced love like this with any1 before..this was a few weeks ago..but the other night I text him saying 'are you over me?'.he replied saying 'everything is over and i regret anything we had'. Its weird cos i kno he still loves me, but after losin my self respect, is it too late to get him wanting me again if i truly do leave him alone'? I know i was so stupid to chase him persistently, n i do regret it, because all i did was call him..Ijust want him wanting me bak, please help n tell me wat to. I truly love this guy.. Thanx.
2006-10-26 13:14:28 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
he was my bestfriend..after all this chaseing, is it possible to get my self-respect back and want me again?..or is it too late?
2006-10-27 05:40:00 · update #1
It sounds like you both need to learn to love yourselves before you can try to love each other again because you have both stopped trusting the other.
For you this means being able to trust that he loves you and, if he really does, he'll come back on his own, without you chasing him.
For him it means being able to trust that you won't be pursuing him all the time or having affairs.
Set up a meeting where you can tell him you want to try again but want to start by talking about the problems both of you had with each other that made you break up. No more texting, talking face to face is much better.
2006-10-27 01:24:19 · answer #1 · answered by lee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to get back your ex is https://tr.im/9Ppvf
Here's the hard part: Pretend she never existed, like it was all a dream, don't call her, that will make you the smaller person, be the bigger person since you deserve better, what she did to you on Valentines Day was immature, especially after dating for four years. This person wasted allot of your time and through it out the window. Go out tonight, even it it is only yourself, don't drink and call or feel sorry for yourself, this will only cause you embarrassment! I know your hurting..This will eventually will go away in time. Today is not a good day for you and your emotions are spinning all over the place.
Please, whatever you do, don't answer her calls and don't call her. If she keeps calling, which she pro bally won't, don't return her call for 5 days. Make her sweat and DO Not get back together right away if you discuss this in 5 days. Tell her since she Broke up with you, you have done allot of thinking, and had the taste of "being single again" and you would like more time being "friends" for now, so you are sure you are making the right decision. Remember "She decided she didn't want to be with you" so the door is open for you to get out and see what you have been missing for four years. You honestly need to do this for yourself.
She doesn't know, but what she did was give you the best valentines day present you will ever get! A new start and a new beginning, use it to your advantage. You will look back on this and Thank God this happened now instead of 4 more wasted years of YOUR life. Today does suck, stay Strong and I promise you your life is going to be so much more exciting and you are going to be happy. If you continue to call and call her, she will think of you as needy and won't want you. She is going to rethink what she did to you today and will be hurt, if you act like you could care less. Girls always want the ones they can't have. That is who you are now to her. Let her suffer,realizing what a mistake she made. This will drive her crazy. Right now she is on cloud 9 thinking you will take her back, OH, is she stupid!
Your life isn't ruined, hers is..She lost someone special, and gave you a gift to let to live life and find someone you deserve. You are not getting back at her, your teaching her what an idiot she is and what she lost and what you gained without her. SO when You eventually talk to her, tell her thank you for what she did...
She will be hurt and you will be happy!
2016-07-19 17:09:04 · answer #2 · answered by steve 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, i have experienced a very similar situation. It has been 4 months since i have split with my long term boyfriend, and finally i have realised that chasing after him is the worse thing you can possibly do. Give him space, and time and if after that he still doesn't want it back, then he wasn't worth your effort. I have chased and chased and it got me no where. Only left me feeling inadequate and pathetic for feeling so crazy and desperate. I tried everything from making him jealous to crying my eyes out. But finally i thought, that it is better to leave him, and remember the fantastic relationship we had rather then him forget all that and simply dread the crazy ex that he has.
I understand that you must love him, but give him time... if he doesn't come back... there is obviously bigger n better things out there for you.
2006-10-26 13:46:11 · answer #3 · answered by Abbey R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me tell you something 1st any time he accuses you of cheating and you know you didnt then dont worry about it. as far as his insecurities you need to really be supportive of him and work with him to get through those problems. its simply said but very hard to do. think about it simply and it may help you. quit complicating things and you will better understand the situation.
Let me also add this to you as well. those women that say leave at the drop of a ******* dime should be shot strected and quartered. apparently they dont believe in love or standing by your man or woman for that matter. Dont leave just cause you have a problem unless it is truely unfixable.
2006-10-26 13:23:00 · answer #4 · answered by K9 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
how can you be so sure that hes not over you and still loves you? What he said certainly isnt the action of someone that still loves you - I think you need to accept that you lost this one and move on with your life.
Failing that all you can really do is text him and pretty much tell him that you're sorry about what happened and you do still love him and if he could find a way to be with you you'd work harder at the relationship.
Good luck either way. xx
2006-10-26 22:36:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no remember what you tell the guy, he will nevertheless think of the comparable way. he's obdurate, i can not blame him nevertheless, 'reason i'm the comparable way. Althoug no longer as much as him. What you're able to do is attempt to hold returned on the finished 'finding-too-attractive' element you have going for him. in case you quite love him, then you definately could comprehend his needs, to three diploma. in simple terms such as you, He must additionally understand and comprehend you as a woman. in case you want to look sturdy, he could comprehend that. i do no longer think of it's going to artwork out for him in simple terms by way of fact he's the jealous style. You gots to publish some agreements with him, he has to grant slightly if he needs to 'take slightly'. In vice versa. sturdy good fortune! P.S. If he's quite THAT jelous then he quite quite likes you.
2016-10-16 10:58:45 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whether he takes you back or not, it is important that you don't forget to take care of yourself first. You're in no position to be in a relationship without self respect, and he can likely see that. Do not put yourself up for pain in this way. Gather and secure yourself in your own right before worrying about him. Then he may come back, and even if he doesn't, you're going to be fine because you've rekindled confidence in yourself.
2006-10-26 13:19:49 · answer #7 · answered by MEGAWALRUS 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the one thing men love is having women chase them! stop now and get on with your life, hes probably laughing at you! get your self respect back and find somebody who is worth the effort!
2006-10-26 20:25:24 · answer #8 · answered by Unhinged.... 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you deserve better. Love shouldn't make you doubt yourself. And all of the back and forth will only futher destroy your own self worth.
2006-10-26 13:20:17 · answer #9 · answered by maile_ana 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get over it and get on with your life. He's an EX for crying out loud. Your the one with the problem, not him. He's over you and moving on.... You do the same.
2006-10-26 13:58:53 · answer #10 · answered by Bikerbutt 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋