have you noticed that many parents literally force their kids to do the things they weren't allowed to? it's so wrong! first you're not letting your child have their own life and have their own dreams/goals..they are doing your stuff! like balet, singing, violen lessons, sat prepp, and sometimes i notice that the child takes courses that parents want him to take.."no you can't take art..take literature instead". i'm not saying that everyone's like that but don't you think i'ts wrong? ya i'm not a parent all right but i know pretty darn well what a child needs..hmm lemmi think...may be it's because...I'M STILL IN HIGH SCHOOL..
2006-10-26 07:41:25 · 10 answers · asked by togamadness 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
-welltraveled- ya about that argument thing i agree..but even if i just say "i don't like it", my parents approve because they trust me, they know i'm sane and smart enough to take care of my own self socially.
2006-10-26 08:03:56 · update #1
+mother B-well yes i guess that's true but there's a differance between a parent..ie-my mother telling me to get in a study group at school then forcing me to do that..see what she said is "just try that math program..see if you like it"..but there are other parents that would be like
"please take it *smile*"
child:but i don't want to (get in the band)..the people are dorky, they don't play guitars, i wanna learn that..i don't wanna play the stupid violen
parent:"what did you say?? *mean look*"
and they make the kid take the thing..that's forcing..and that's exactly what i'm saying, that the kid doesn't enjoy it because he does it FOR YOU..the parent.
2006-10-26 08:10:30 · update #2
I am the father of three children (the girls are 27 and 23, my son is 21). I know that there are parents that fit your description. However, not all are like that. We tried our best to our children to be able to make decisions and choices for themselves. They joined groups or played sports when they developed an interest and not when we decided they should. Our main interest was not that they stay busy but that they still had time to just be kids and explore. They chose their majors at school, and their friends. Sure we gave advice but we tried our best to never dictate to them. Only when they could be in danger did we step in and voice our opinions more forcefully. We certainly weren't the best parents in the world nor were we the worst. Something worked out I guess because the girls are both in school for their masters degrees and my son is in his junior year in college on a sports scholarship. I think the key is raising your kids so that they can think for themselves.
2006-10-26 07:50:38 · answer #1 · answered by toff 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some parents live vicariously through their kids -- trying to make sure they "get" to do all the things they couldn't do when they were kids. And yes, I agree that's wrong.
However, some things your parents "make" you do really are "for your own good" (even though that phrase is way overused).
The fact is, it's a parent's job to guide their children until they're old enough to make their own decisions responsibly. Some parents do that well, some don't. In either case, if you don't like what your parents are "making" you do, then prove to them that you're mature enough to make your own choices. Tell they WHY you want or don't want to do a particular thing, and have good arguments why. Just saying, "I don't like it" isn't good enough, it makes you still sound immature. Show them that you understand what a particular thing will or won't mean for your future employment, educational, or personal development. Show them the things you want to do are constructive and will help with your career or just in making you a better person. If you can present your positions clearly and persuasively, your parents will probably recognize your maturity and give you more freedom to make your own choices.
Oh, and I'm a parent (2 kids), and I don't want either one of them to be like me. I DO want them to be well-educated, happy, satisfied in their work, and have good solid relationships. :)
2006-10-26 14:48:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
My parents aren't like that, they spoiled me when I was little, but turned out to be such a nice person. My point is that not all parents do all of that for there children, some kids are homeless, or even an orphan. Be grateful for what you have, I am. They're pobably trying to give you a life that they have never have. My parents tried. My mom tried to keep me at a stable home, but lets just say that SOME people are just plain cruel.
2006-10-26 14:48:54 · answer #3 · answered by nunyah business 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes parents want their children to experience things in their lives that they enjoyed themselves. I wanted my daughter to be in the Band because I really enjoyed the close group that it envolved. She got it for my sake but did not like it as much as me and got out. I have not pursued it more becuse atleast she tried it. Parents should know that their children will develop thier own interest. But it does not hurt to try what your parents liked to. If you don't then they should understand.
2006-10-26 14:48:21 · answer #4 · answered by MotherB 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Wow that's awesome, did ya know that most females fail Gem b/c they won't dress out? Ya know?
2006-10-26 14:45:13 · answer #5 · answered by kam_1261 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My parents weren't like that...guess I was lucky.
I know I don't want to be that way as a mother myself.
2006-10-26 14:43:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
validates their life, choices, decisions.
they need a vote of approval on who they are.
soon enough you will be in control.
2006-10-26 14:43:03 · answer #7 · answered by Sufi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
mom of 3 never made any of my childern do things they did not want other than mind,
2006-10-26 14:45:40 · answer #8 · answered by mawma 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I didn't, I simply encouraged them to be the best person they could be.
2006-10-26 14:44:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Why do you want parents to be just like you?
2006-10-26 14:42:50 · answer #10 · answered by jonas_tripps_79 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋