English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

39 year old husband having affair with 22 year old for three months. they are sexual and seem addicted to each other. we have four children under the age of 4. husband is not seeking divorce, I am because he will not end it with her and try to work on us. however, he states he wants to just separate because in the future he knows his affair/relationship will fail and he wants me there to pick up the pieces. I think he is just covereing all his bases so he will never have to truly be alone. he is narcissistic and has ADD and is enjoying his "freedom and spontaniety" and of course sex with his new relationship. One of the reasons he states he left me was because when I became a mother and my body changed he couldn't be intimate with me the same anymore..he claims he respected me too much as a mother and couldn't see me intimately as his wife. BTW, I am 5'8" 130 lbs. Our son was 6 months old when he started this affair, but they have worked together for a year.

2006-10-26 07:29:41 · 25 answers · asked by almostover 2 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

25 answers

Unbelievable. Ditch him...he's a jerk. Does he really think you will want him back to mend his broken heart after the girl ditches him? He must be so full of himself that it's not funny. Divorce is the only answer unless you want to be cheated on for the rest of your life. Remember, how you live your life is what you're teaching your children about picking a spouse.

Also...write down or tape all that he says and give the information to your lawyer...I'm certain a judge would love to hear what he has to say when making his decision.

2006-10-26 07:38:08 · answer #1 · answered by DeborahDel 6 · 1 0

He is telling you to stay with him even though he is being unfaithful. To stay in case things fall apart with him and his homewrecker ho. Not caring about you and your kids but about his own selfish needs. Yes I would divorce his sorry a$$. Alot of us mothers look different after having kids and my husband looks at other women that makes me wonder is that what he wants me to look like. I am not over weight nice looking and I am a stay at home mom so i dont always dress up but when we get out I always look my best. Heck if i was your size I would be happy is something wrong with his eyes? Dont stay in this marriage so he can have his fun and hurt you at the same time. You are beautiful and worthy of a caring loving guy who will be faithful. You get your divorce and get that good man he is out there and when things fall apart w/her ex he can see what he is missing out on. Dont give him the opportunity to do this anymore at least not while he is with you its not ok. You have 4 kids I would be proud of that weight. You go find happiness and show it off you hot momma! Get your life back.

2006-10-26 07:48:36 · answer #2 · answered by 2wild4u 3 · 0 0

Wow, he's using you for back up.

This really isn't fair to you. He wants you to wait for him to have his fun, catch a few diseases, have another baby to pay child support for.

This marriage is over. It's not fair to you or your children to stay.

What's more, he's full of BS about the whole "respect" statement that he made. If he really felt that way, you would have only had one child.

Divorce him. I'm not an advocate of divorce, but this is one of those situations that's not going to get better.

It sounds like he doesn't want a divorce so that YOU can't find someone else too.

I feel for you.

2006-10-26 07:45:02 · answer #3 · answered by andi b 4 · 0 0

hey u seamed like a beautiful young lady DON'T PUT UP WHIT THIS CRAP!!!I'm a sorry but if u have some differences in your body is due to the fact that the *** hole got u pregnant. if he wants the young bit@#Q$ go for it but don't use your body as a excuse.
DO U REALLY WANT TO PUT UP WITH HIS CRAP. and dear he will not change, when and if this affair is over and he has nobody to fuc@ he will come back to bed with u until he gets another bit#$. how much of this r u willing to swallow. don't be dumb drop his motherfuckin@ *** and go for your divorce show him that u don't need to be treated like this and that u will not except being treated like this!!!!!!
u are worth more than this assho73 can offer u!!!
please listen to all of this girls r saying to u HE WILL NOT CHANGE!!!i went trough the same crap with my ex- hubby for ten yrs and i am a mother of 3.yes it Will be difficult raising your Little gifts from GOD but u can do it have faith in yourself .Dear kids or not u will find a man who will love u and your kids and who will respect all of your family . I GOT MINE!!!!just be patient

2006-10-26 07:51:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Usually I would say go to counseling and get professional help, but with him saying that he knows eventually the other relationship will fail and he will come back to you, then he is wanting to have his cake and eat it too. Hell, you are not even big. I say leave him, take your children and make sure you get the child support from him. He is very selfish and only thinking about his pleasure and not you nor his kids. You deserve better.

2006-10-26 07:41:35 · answer #5 · answered by Marie 2 · 0 0

Divorce him...you deserve so much better. I just divorced my husband for having an affair with a younger woman. I know it is hard. It will hurt but you need to respect yourself. He obviously does not.

2006-10-26 07:52:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If he is unwilling to end the affiar, go striaght for the Divorce. The affiar will end at some point but he will have another. No one diserves to live like that and you don't know what he might catch while he is out sleeping around.

2006-10-26 07:41:02 · answer #7 · answered by MotherB 4 · 0 0

What a lazy butthead!!!
He knows things wont work with this other woman, but he is too lazy to ended and do the right thing. What a great example for your children "You don't have to do anything in life it will sort itself out for you".

I usually recommend working on it, but in this case go straight to divorce.

2006-10-26 07:41:43 · answer #8 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0 0

Yes go and get a divorce from this man. Why would you have to tie up your life for him, waiting for him to come back to you. who knows where he has been, and what kind of diseases he is bring back. You deserve some happiness also! Start to think about yourself, your are worth it. Honey! move on, and don't even think of taking him back!

2006-10-26 07:45:15 · answer #9 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0 0

Your husband doesn't want you to divorce because he knows full well that you'll take him to the cleaners for alimony and child support after catching him committing adultery.

Get a good lawyer and take care of the kids - this loser certainly won't.

2006-10-26 07:33:24 · answer #10 · answered by drumrb0y 5 · 1 0

fedest.com, questions and answers