now before you judge im a good mother i have my own apartment my boyfriend works construction and is in the union
and makes good money my daughter has her own room i take care of her myself i dont ask anyone to babysit or pawn her off on other people i take care of her myself but everyone seems to give me no credit and down me for getting pregnant again and i want my baby and enjoy my daughter and am looking foward to meeting my son so even though i'm only 20 am i wrong for having kids even though i take good care and responsibility for them??
2006-10-26 06:21:04 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Not at all!!! YOU GO GIRL!! I am now 30, but I had my daughter (planned) at 17 and my son (not so planned) at 19. I got a lot of crap for it...but I took care of my kids, raised them well and taught them manners and good morals. Unfortunately their dad turned out to be a piece of crap...so I did it all on my own for a long time. Now I am remarried to an amazing man and a fantastic father of two....he is my very best friend in the world, a better father to my children than their own..and we are 7 months along with a baby girl! We ahve a beautiful home with a pool, cars that are paid for and a retirement plan...Just because you started young doesn't mean you can't do it!
My kids are now 10 and 12 years old and they are on the honor roll, compete in sports, my son plays the drums, and we are constanly commented on well behaved and intelligent they are! MORE POWER TO YA!! :)
2006-10-26 06:50:20 · answer #1 · answered by Sunshine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all mature at different rates. Just because you are 20 years old does not mean that you are immature or irresponsible. I was 21 with my first child and 22 with my second. I was married though, but I also got looked down on for having children so young, but also having them so close together. They are now 6 and 8 years old. I have stayed at home with them along with being a Nanny to 5 other children. I love my life and I love that I am the age that I am. I think in a way I will be able to handle the teenage years a bit better than the woman that started having children at 30 because I can relate a bit better.
But no, you are not wrong!! You have made this decision for yourself and your family, and it sounds like it has been the best decision for all of you.
Don't worry what the world thinks. They don't have to live a day in your shoes.
Congratulations on the little boy!! Daughters are amazing!! But being a mother to a son is amazing in such a different way!!!
Good luck and keep following your heart!!!
2006-10-26 06:35:28 · answer #2 · answered by lil_hem_n_va 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A baby is a blessing even if it comes unexpected. I am 20 years old and my son is two my husband is not his bio-dad. My husband right now is working as a manager at a reasturant he only worked there for four months and he was promoted. But he is about to go work construction for his father. So can have better hours and also benefits. Right now I am a stay at home mom but this summer I am going to get training to become a pharmacy tech. We wont have alot of money and we have done everything completly backward. Our wedding was after our son was born. But we are happy and we have an amazing child a beautiful little boy. And even though he was badly timed and I havent even started the schooling I want to be in WE ARE HAPPY. And incredibly lucky. I still have the rest of my life to figure everything else out. Your daughter will be fine but not if you disown her for keeping and wanting and loving her child. WHat if your parents hadnt wanted you to have your first child due to whatever reasons Imagine how you would feel. You are a mother and you should understand what your daughter is going through. She didnt ask for any of this to happen but she is taking it head on and you should be proud. And instead you are just being weak and letting your husband do all the thinking. Look at your child What did you promise her when she was born...,that you would love her for ever no matter what. Thats what a mother feels for her child. You say you dont want to set a bad example for the younger kids but what are you teaching them about family if you turn your back on your oldest daughter.
2016-05-21 22:30:50 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are like that. I am a stay at home mom,i have 6 children and i am 26. I have a 9,7,5,3,and 1 year old twins. If this is what makes you happy then who cares about people. You should see when my family even takes a trip to the mall. I have a double stroller for the twins,my other 4 walk together in front of my husband and i,on top of that i am half black and half white with a fairly light complexsion and green eyes,and my husband is a dark skinned black man,so you can only imagine the looks we get.I just laugh it off. My husband is 34 and he is an orthopedic surgeon,but people don't look at you and say wow a beautiful young family,they look at you and think welfare,trailer trash.Its a sad thing to see how people really are. I say congratulations to you,and the number of children you should have is you and your boyfriends decision. Screw those people,just smile and enjoy your family,at the end of the day thats all that matters.You do not need their approval.
2006-10-26 06:38:06 · answer #4 · answered by mommyofsix 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You obviously have to do whatever makes you comfortable and happy. However, what your friends & family are maybe trying to tell you is that you might be taking on a bit too many responsabilities so young; and at 40, once children are out of the house, what are you gonna do?
The risk here is that you don't one day realize that you had so many dreams and desires that you are putting aside for kids.
ONLY you can be the judge in defining what are you goals: active & curious about how you rate in society OR a bit more passive and dedicated to family.
Whatever the answer, make sure you accept what you do and don't get pushed by others.
2006-10-26 06:38:00 · answer #5 · answered by Yan M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I don't understand. You know there'll always be idiots in the world, especially people who behave like idiots because they're just jealous. If they're too many of those around you, then it may be that you're "too good" for your neighbourhood, and are ripe to move out to something better where you'll fit in and less people will be jealous?
Age? Well, I have a friend, she's 30 (or 31 I can't remember just now), and pregnant with her 7th child, yes that's right, 7th. So she started about the same time as you.
So enjoy it. And again, if too many jealous assholes among your neighbours, move out!
good luck
2006-10-26 06:31:05 · answer #6 · answered by AntoineBachmann 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not wrong. As long as you are a loving mother who takes good care of her kids no-one has any room to judge you or look down on you for having 2 children so young. It's your life!
2006-10-26 06:28:40 · answer #7 · answered by dmommab@sbcglobal.net 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People used to have kids at 13. There is no way to make a broad statement about at what age people should be having kids. Generally, I think it's better to have a little more life under your belt before attempting to raise a child, but it sounds like you are emotionally and financially capable of caring for children, which is my test, so you make your own decision. It varies from one person to another. There are bad mothers of all ages, so there must be good ones, too.
2006-10-26 06:26:25 · answer #8 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! If you take care of your kids and you're happy then why not? I have a beautiful 4 month old which makes me happy... and I plan on having more. I'm only twenty one so don't worry so much what other people think... I think some people are MEANT to be mommies... I think thats what i'm suppose to do. Not in the sexist "women are suppose to be mommies" way but in a way that I never felt "complete" before my son... and now I do... so just be happy with who you are and what you have...
2006-10-26 06:38:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm 23 and I have a 7 year old and 1 year old daughter. I'm a single parent with a great job, my own apartment (3bdrm), I finished school and gradualted college. As long as you take care of your business, and you know you do, don't care what others think or say!! Good luck!!!
2006-10-26 06:33:07 · answer #10 · answered by [un]bro/ken 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋