Is it wrong to be in a 3 way relationship with a married couple?

Question

I have known the male for some time and we have a special bond. Earlier this year, I started sleeping with both of them 2gether. We all very much enjoy this but emotions get caught up and we all have deep feelings for each other. I naturally shy away from relationships and am finding this difficult. My bond with the male is stronger than ever but don't misinterpret that to meaning I want him for myself, it isn't like that. The female is straight & has struggled to understand why she both enjoys our encounters and feels so strongly for me. I feel this can't go on longterm but wonder if I'm just trying to run away from myself and the vunerablity I feel. I usually 'control' my relationships and they are usually with females so I feel out of my depth here. Any sensible advice welcome, pls no stupid comments to gain points! Thanks

I have known the male for some time and we have a special bond. Earlier this year, I started sleeping with both of them 2gether. We all very much enjoy ths but emotions get caught up and we all have deep feelings for each other. I naturally shy away frm relationships and am finding this difficult. My bond with the male is stronger than ever but don't misinterpret that to meaning I want him for myself it isn't like that. The female is straight & has struggled to understand why she both enjoys our encounters n feels so strongly for me. I feel this cant go on longterm but wonder if Im just trying to run away frm myself n the vunerablity I feel. I usually 'control' my relationships n they r usually with fmales so I feel out of my depth here. Any sensible advice welcome no stupid comments to gain points!
I wish to clarify a couple of things frm ure responses I know Im not being used This is difficult for all of us. The couple also have a yg family I didnt have anythg physical wid Male b4

Answer 1

There is nothing in the world like being loved, cherished, adored, desired, respected and lusted after - not withstanding the birth of children - and you are not getting 100% of any of those things and that is what everyone truly deserves.

I suspect you already know the answer to your own question, just be true to your heart

Answer 2

I don't know if it is wrong, but it is dangerous. Yes I do, it is never good to interfere in someone else's marriage. (no matter what)

If you feel it can't go on long term then it really can't. Be glad that it has been enjoyed by everyone and bow out, before it gets messy and nasty.

You are having strong and confusing feelings and thoughts and that is just the thing that therapists are wanting to help people with. Perhaps consider that as part of taking good care of your self and your growth.

Answer 3

We just work really hard to keep each other the focus of our lives. You may have a job for 1 year, 3 years, 15 years... you will be married for life... try not to let the pressures of life come between your love. I don't care how big our tv screen is... how many g's my phone is... there is nothing better than being at home with my wife, we cook meals together, read books together, talk, laugh... and unless one of us is sick, we make love every night... it is a given. So many couples stop being together... go through patches where they have not made love for weeks or months.... I swear that it helps us remember that we are not "buddies", not "roommates"... we are lovers. It also helps to be involved in the same hobbies and desires... we share, we compromise... we do not form two many memories that we both can't reflect upon.... I wish I could sum it up better than that.

Answer 4

Yes. In the end, threesomes end up destroying relationships. Don't be the reason for a marriage break-up. It will end up possibly destroying your ability to commit to a one-on-one relationship, with a man or a woman. You've said it yourself, emotions get caught up. You can't continue with this. And the guy should have had more sense than to stray from his wife, whether he had her consent or not. I'm not going to be harsh on your involvement either. The very fact that you've posted this question speaks volumes that you're having very serious doubts as to whether this is right or not. Please get out of there and make a life for yourself. You'll only end up damaging your own mental well-being in the not so distant future. Good luck and i hope you find happiness. x

Answer 5

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Answer 6

Marriage is between two people, not three. This is not a good situation and one you should have never gotten into....your just asking for problems in a big way. There is no way you can come out of this one a winner in any way. You need to walk away. From both of them before you end up in something much worse. Good luck.

Answer 7

i don't think its wrong as you all feel the same way, but i don't think anything like this can work long time, initially i suppose it must be exciting but the novelty will wear off, and thats when the problems start, and could end up all 3 of you going your separate ways, i think, for what its worth, you should get out of it for your own sake and maybe just have a little while by yourself to sort your head out, good luck

Answer 8

There is nothing wrong with the way you feel as you are not looking to break up the marriage. I also feel that this can not go on long term and you will need to figure out why you shy away from relationships and need to in time start on up on your own.

Answer 9

That's odd. I feel revolted b/c u having a three way but the love part just makes is sound less revolting. Hmmmm
Well I don't know what I can say here but if u love them both and they both love you I guess u could stay a little longer.
I'm out of depth here. Sorry I bothered to make a attempt to answer this.
Good Luck with what ever u choose to do.

Answer 10

Normally i'd say if everyone is fine with it then don't worry. Just because it doesn't fit peoples idea of conventional doesn't make it wrong.
However, you've all allowed feelings to get involved which complicates things, and i see this heading towards you being caught in the middle of a divorce. I'd step away if i were you.