our male neighbor is a seaman and comes home every 3 months. last month, my husband and i saw his wife with another man waiting for a bus outside a mall. they were holding hands and the man had his arms around our female neighbor. when we got home, we found out that the man she was with was the construction worker who worked across their house. since then, the man has been in and out of their house. our houses are close to eachother and we often see the boyfriend leave the house late at night. now her husband is back and they are having something fixed in their house. the boyfriend is the one fixing it. the husband comes over to chat sometimes. we are not close friends but we found out that he's hardworking and very devoted to his family. he says it breaks his heart to leave them but he has to work abroad to be able to afford raising their 3 children. i don't plan on meddling but i'd like to know what others would do if they were in my situation.
2006-10-26 04:24:40 · 27 answers · asked by sheilanmanny12 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I would find a way to anonymously tell him. I don't know about the letter idea, as his wife may get it instead of him.
I do want to say this, if you do tell him and their marriage splits up, you are in NO WAY, SHAPE, FORM or FASHION responsible for their marriage ending. His wife and her actions will be responsible for that happening.
In closing, think about it this way. Wouldn't you want to be told if your spouse were cheating? There is no guarantee their marriage will break up, or that it won't. They could go to counseling and work to make everything right again. At the very least, this man will no longer have to deal with the embarrassment of his wife spreading herself all over town if their marriage does end. I am willing to bet if she has this guy, there are others you may not have yet seen.
2006-10-26 04:50:06 · answer #1 · answered by bowtierodz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its best to let matters be. There's a saying ' everyday is for the thief but one day is for the owner of the house'. I bet one day the husband would find out for himself. Dont be the one to break up a marriage. The wife might realise herself and either break up the relationship or worse yet end her marriage. Maybe you can also tactfully tell the husband to look for a job nearby cos family is much more important than what money brings in. Let him understand that his growing children need him and also his wife. Dont say this to make him suspicious. here tact is needed so be very careful with what you say and how you act.
2006-10-26 13:03:17 · answer #2 · answered by girlfunny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That would be so tough to be a witness to. My heart goes out to the husband, who has no idea what his wife is doing. Chances are good that there's the cheating going on. But just maybe you might not know the whole situation. You really don't know the people that well, and actually there's nothing you can do. It's not your business to be involved. You must not interfere. Go on with your life, and ignore your neighbors. That's difficult to do, but it's not your problem.
2006-10-26 11:34:20 · answer #3 · answered by sweeta : 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
whatever u do..don't let them know that you know about it..write a letter.
oh my that's heartbreaking..how dare she does this to her husband. I would mail something to him before he leaves. tell him that people in the neighborhood have seen and been talking about his wife having an affair with the construction worker. and that he might want to be aware that some of us have seen her with him, holding hands...i think he shoudl know...she's such a sleaz!!! to do that to him.
one other thing you could do is start being friendlly with the wife..go over there and make sure you are interuppting..then when u get to know her tell her that u saw her and the guy together..maybe she will confess and won't do it again, and be supportive.
2006-10-26 11:31:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is none of your dam business. What gone on in th dark will eventually come to light. A man that willing to go away for 3 months at a time does not deserve this. Just stay out of it, it will come to the light.
2006-10-26 11:43:11 · answer #5 · answered by Ellen J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would confront the woman first.... I guess... then move on to the husband and tell him what u saw and tell him not to jump to any conclusions... but this is what u saw...but sometimes I don't get people. Why they cheat and all that? I mean if ur not happy where u are, divorce.... don't go screwing around.... the other person can be devasted and heartbroken...
2006-10-26 11:30:16 · answer #6 · answered by Maggz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is totally the cowards way out, but I do believe that he has a right to know. Send an anonymous letter. That way YOU can't publicly be blamed for breaking up the marriage. You will always know it was you though.
Look at it this way. You are a woman. If you saw that it was HIM cheating on HER would you tell her? Woman to woman?
2006-10-26 11:31:54 · answer #7 · answered by concretebrunette 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah!!! I would just ask was he a relative or something and the husband would have to take it from there.
2006-10-26 11:40:48 · answer #8 · answered by Stacye 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would give the wife a couple of hints that you know what shes up to and mabey she will admit or mabey it wont be what you expected. and i wouldnt tell the husband. thats thier bussiness, :) goodluck
2006-10-26 11:28:12 · answer #9 · answered by i am the dream u r the dreamer 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tough situation...
Can you send an anonymous email to both him and her divulging
her adulterous affair ??
This would keep you out of it....
2006-10-26 11:43:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋