My ex and I have been separated many years (15+), but never legally divorced (or legally separated for that matter. My ex was an officer in the Navy when we married and when we separated. My ex left me with no warning or provocation. Came home from work and found most of the furniture taken and no good bye note. How do I find out what benefits I am, if any, entitled too and who should I contact to get more information?? We were married in the state of Louisiana if that matters.
2006-10-26 03:23:13 · 8 answers · asked by ripster0629 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
So...I was in (and still kind of in) the same kind of predicament! I learned a few things along the way so I hope they help you!
1. You want to get in touch with an Ombudsman that works/assists families on your spouse's base. Ombudsman are there to assist families. They provide a link/ liasion between naval families and the command!
Check out this site to see if you can locate the one your looking for
http://deploymentlink.osd.mil/deploy/family/family_support.shtml
2. The military does reccommend the spouse who is in the military to provide spousal support to his/her spouse once a seperation/pending divorce is occuring. Here's the catch that I learned about the hard way! The Army for example makes this order mandatory but the Navy...optional. I know it's horrible! So the best way to get around this is to get in touch with an ombudsman and tell him/her or your story and they get in touch with the command...more specifically your husband's commanding officer. It's a bad reflection on the Navy (code of conduct) so they will reccommend to your spouse to help you out! But be warned...you will have to fight b/c he can still resist.
3. Now if there's any type of abuse or harrasment be sure to let them now! That kind of stuff is untolerated. He could even loose his job for that! Let the ombudsman know if that is occuring and tell them to contact his officials ASAP.
(My ex was harrasing and threatining me but I didn't let the ombudsman know until it was too late. Don't make my mistake)
4. Do you still have your military ID? You are still entitled to use it until you are officially divorced so if he's taken that from you (as was with the case with me) be sure to stress that fact.
5. Do you still have insurance coverage? He is technically not allowed to take you off of Tricare until the divorce is finalized. Best to fight that if he has. My ex and I are seperated but I still have coverage! If this has occured get in touch with tricare and let them know the situation!
http://www.tricare.osd.mil/
6. Some bases offer a seminar about divorce seperation and if you're able to attend one and visit a local base you should definetly do that. Here's another catch. The Navy/military offers Jagg officer assistance (basically a military lawyer) to the spouse (whether military or not) who attends that meeting first. Now even if your husband has gone you are still entitled to legal help through them. Such as legal advice.
Now...you will talk to diffrent people and they will probably tell you different things. Mainly because people don't want you to know all the things that can support you. Please believe that these are your rights but you still want to contact and ombudsman to shed more light on these topics that i've raised. Although I know all these things I eventually gave up fighting for my right to spousal support but if you stick with it you should get some sort of assistance! I hope this has helped you. It took me a period of a year to learn all of this stuff! If you need to contact me for additional questions please feel free to do so! honeybee32_1@yahoo.com.
I wish you much luck and strength!
2006-10-26 04:02:47 · answer #1 · answered by Melissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was military but my mother seperated from my step father for 20 years but they never got divorced so she could keep her benefits. He tried to start divorce proceedings right before he died but since it didnt go through before he did, she keeps them for life. So yes you are entitled to them. But if you find him and he divorces you, you will lose them. But as in my stepfathers case he may agree to an arrangement whereas all you want is military benefits (free medical, air travel, etc.) and not take half his house and alimony and such. Because you would still also be entitled to part of his retirement regardless. It would cost him a huge amount of money. So I would start by trying to find him..... look up "buddy finder" on the web. Or you could go straight to it. Call the local base of any service and ask to speak to the Judge Advocate General (JAG office, its the military lawyers). You will need his Social Security. You are legally entitled to use them, and you may need them... especially depending on how far you want to go with this. If he remarried his current one is invalid so he may just wish to settle...... don't feel guilt as he didnt even leave a note. So the answer depends on a few more details, mother would know all about this and I know a bit more so if you have questions email me. Good luck!
2006-10-26 04:05:23 · answer #2 · answered by jackson 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure you get in touch with the JAG office and found out they will tell you although if he is still in the navy . If not and they have retired then you are entitled to a portion of those retirement benefits since you are not divorced yet. Good luck and god bless.
2006-10-26 03:45:48 · answer #3 · answered by Kate T. 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As long as you are still married and your ex is still in the military, you are entitled to full benefits, commissary, medical, dental, and other base privileges. Contact the nearest base legal office or family service center for more information.
2006-10-26 03:27:45 · answer #4 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOu are entitle to her BAH and medical insurance, and guess hwat... if you divocer, you are entitled to 37% of her retirement!! (2.5 % per year of marriage) !!!!!!!!!! You must contact her Unit commander, or better still the I.G. on the Naval Base and file an I.G. Complaint for spousal support. Under UMCJ, you are entitled to BAH (housing allowance) by LAW!!!!!!!!
Filing the complaint is easy and you can ask for the money to be deposited into your account directly.
Good luck
2006-10-26 03:31:19 · answer #5 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could start with a lawyer... He may have been receiving BAS as a married person all of those years and you would have been entitled to a portion of them. Why have you waited 15+ years to get off your butt and question this? Or, have you been otherwise entangled and just didn't think about it until now?
2006-10-26 03:26:48 · answer #6 · answered by IGH3Rat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it depends on what benefits you're asking about. If it's an ID card or medical, you have to be enrolled in DEERS for that to be effective, and if he doesn't carry you as a dependent thenyou will not be in DEERS. Now if it's like his life insurance and all that you're concerned about getting then there is paper work that he fills out and updates every year. I doubt your on them.
2006-10-26 03:45:03 · answer #7 · answered by aguywithnothingbettertodo 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
as far as I know in the you have to file separation without reconciliation papers and be separated for a year before you can divorce. as far as benefits because you are not legally separated/divorced you are still entailed to the same benefits as when you were together.
2006-10-26 03:29:35 · answer #8 · answered by jeleaya82 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋