My husband and i have been together for a little over two years. Within the last week he has decided he wants to move back to North Dakota. In the past we have talked about moving there but he never seemed serious about it or anything so I never took him serious. Yesterday he put in his two weeks at work without warning. So now I know for sure he's serious. Should I tell him I'm not comfortable with just packing up and going or go and try to make the best of it? But I have lived here pretty much my whole life this is where I feel most comfortable.
2006-10-26 03:21:05 · 48 answers · asked by leigh 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You should tell him. Communication is vital and you're going to need to support one another to make this move work. With that said, he can't support you if he doesn't know what's going through your head. It's natural for you to feel apprehensive. I'd be worried about you if you weren't!
It's going to be a huge change for you but if you approach it in the right manner, it can be a huge adventure. Given an honest chance, it might even be the best thing that happened to you.
I moved from Southern Cal (lived there most of my life and my family is all still there) to Wyoming. Talk about culture shock! I've been here two years now and it's been the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love it here and honestly can't imagine living elsewhere now.
2006-10-26 03:31:25 · answer #1 · answered by cgspitfire 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit him down and tell him what you wrote here. That you thought he wasn't serious about moving. He should have discussed his plans for change with you before he did it. Although he might be fed up with his job and decided to go. What will you be living on when you move? Do you have enough savings to live on until things get settled and new jobs are found? If you don't feel comfortable with moving and you go to try to make the best of it you will resent him if you don't like it or can't find a job ect. Talk to him NOW. Don't move until you two have come to an arrangement about everything. All plans should be fully thought out not thrown at you. Sometimes change is good but make sure you know where and how you will live. Good Luck
2006-10-26 03:32:24 · answer #2 · answered by smile4u 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are married now and so you will have to step out of your comfort zone and go with your husband. You never know, you may really like it there. It seems like he would have had a more in depth conversation with you about the move though. I grew up a military brat and we moved every 2 years until I was in high school. It was very hard on my Mom and us changing schools and stuff all the time but we did get to experience alot and meet alot of different people. This may be a new life experience for you. Make the best of it.
2006-10-26 03:29:03 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you will resent him if you dont tell him now. He must not know your real feelings if he put in his notice and is planning to move. Does he have nother job lined up or are you two just leaving and starting a new? That would be my concern. I would have to have a plan before I just up and left my comfort zone.
If he does have a new job or something that will worth moving then, Change might be good though- keep a open mind about the situation it may be a new start for a better life.
You can always go visit your home town or have then visit you.
2006-10-26 03:29:59 · answer #4 · answered by ROOTER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! Sounds like you led him to believe you were okay with the move. Now he has put in his notice and is ready to move. If you had told him from the start you were on the fence he would of giving it more thought instead of thinking you were good to go. At this point you really need to talk to him about this. Nobody likes to be out of there comfort zone but you may actually love it there. If he has no choice now but to make the move then you need to go with him and make the best of it and next time speak from the heart.
2006-10-26 03:31:07 · answer #5 · answered by Kim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you should lie to him and regret it the rest of your life. Of course you should tell him. THe problem is what happens when you see that you have to go or not go or whatever. These are the kinds of moments that lead to divorce for some or the misery of an unfulfilled marriage for others. Just be honest. Two week notice without warning we're leaving honey isnt very considerate to you though either. Definitely dont sit idle by while someone swoops you up in to their unresponsible/undesireable life. Prayers for you to manage with strength confidence and poise.
love
2006-10-26 03:27:00 · answer #6 · answered by lightlytread 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I certainly do not. even as issues do not make experience, then there is in a lot of situations some mendacity going about. Why would this random woman take position at your door step speaking about stealing your husband faraway from you? Why would this woman attempt this if her guy became kicked out of the abode? for sure she did not like him, so why would she be speaking about stealing a guy decrease back? issues do in basic terms not upload up, or make any experience the following. that typically skill your husband became on the spot, had to make up a tale about a difficulty. more effective than in all chance about the garments contained in the decrease back backyard. It in all likelihood became not his acquaintances from artwork, yet once you position him on the spot he had to make up any excuse he might want to that type of made experience, now he's attempting to tie that excuse into this different woman, and it in basic terms doesn't make experience. Your husband isn't being thoroughly straightforward with you.
2016-12-05 06:13:59 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think you may have waited too long to even discuss it with him? At the first glance of moving anywhere, you should have let your feelings be known even if you thought hes wasn't serious. Waiting for some things is not always good, when something sounds like it may be a joke, you may have been being tested. Jump on it next time.
2006-10-26 03:45:19 · answer #8 · answered by Special K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you should tell him the truth. Better late than never. He put in his notice not quit. If he is on good terms with his boss he may be able to withdraw the two week notice. And the next time he talks to you about something you should always take him serious.
2006-10-26 03:26:24 · answer #9 · answered by Daddy Big Dawg 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell, yes! This is a decision that the two of you need to make together. It may not be entirely satisfactory to each of you but you need to reach a common ground. There may be a lot more in his agenda than he has been willing to talk with you about...and it's time to do it now. By the way winter is coming...and North Dakota gets friggin' chilly.
2006-10-26 03:24:14 · answer #10 · answered by IGH3Rat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋