what type of dicipline method your parents used and do you use the same with your kid?

Question

what i know is parental influence is very high in a kid..i was asking what type of dicipline method your parent used at you when you were lil..what i know is that parental influence is so much on a kid that if he was raised up with love and respect he would love his own kid and the kid who was raised up with whipping or spanking will spank his kid unless hes intellegent enough to know its wrong..i have also seen the people saying who were spanked as lil that what we are is what we are because of spanking so we will spank our kid also so its like a cycle you know your parents spank you and you spank yours only few are intellegent enough to break this vicious cycle..so i was asking all the people here that what type of diciplie method your parents used when you were lil and do you use the same method with your kid if you gonna have one or have one already????

Answer 1

First of all I want to say I agree with Mark G.

As child I was spanked severely--at times more like beating. I now have a son, and while I do spank him, I do not do it like my parents did. I have worked hard to *train* him and he listens to me more often than not, because he has learned that the consequences are not fun (ie, I take his toy away if he throws it, smack his hand if he touches something dangerous/off limits, etc.) I have been told by several people that my son is very well-behaved, and he is very well-adjusted.

Too many people are too lazy to take on the responsibility of training their children, and then don't understand why their children don't respect them.

So, to answer your question, I guess I have modified the approach my parents took, and made it more palatable for me.

Answer 2

You have obviously decided this for yourself since you state that intelligent people do not spank their kids. So why ask. Understand that spanking is a completely different thing from child abuse and beating a child. Big difference. If you are not smart enought to differenciate that then you really should not be doing any research on this subject, and I hope to God that you never work in a Social Services capacity. As for someone that works in a jail, and has experience with a juvenile detention center, I can state this. Most kids who are in constant trouble are either beaten physically, mentally, or sexually, or are kids that have NEVER been disiplined at all. In the 50's, 60's and 70's spanking was the normal form of parental disipline. The juvenile crime rate has soared since then, with the don't spank mentality, and the single parent households which usually means no father at home. The father is the one more likely to spank a child. My daughter is a honor student, and according to her teachers (just went to the Parent teacher conf today) very well adjusted socailly and extremely popular. She did not get spanked often but she has been. Parental involvement is the biggest thing in my experience. Do things with your child, spend time with them, praise them when they do good, tell them your proud when you are, tell them when you disappointed when they disappoint you, and punish them when they are bad. I coach fastpitch softball. Too many parents use practice and games to babysit. They drop their kids off and go run around and do other things. NOTHING is more important to kids than their parents participation. PS I got spanked, my friends got spanked, and not one of us ended up in jail, all of us have good jobs, and all of us have children that are in college or in high school preparing to go to college. They got spanked too. None of them have been arrested, use drugs, has a drinking problem.