Again, my boyfriend and I don't have any problem, but recently my mind is with another guy whom I've known for only one month. When I am with my BF, I know only half of me is with him. I feel really bad though because he is such a great guy and understands me of who I am. We have gone through a lot of stuff together and he is my bestfriend. The thing is that I've thought a lot about this new guy and can't really get rid of his picture. My boyfriend and I have been together for like 5 years. I really don't wanna throw this relationship away, but at the same time, I feel bad for not giving him the whole me. What am I supposed to do? Stay away from the new guy (whom I work with) or try to fish around. I am not very pround of my thought at all. Help! I really need a straight forward comment.
2006-10-24 17:31:17 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Really don't wanna throw away this long tern relationship over a guy whom I just know for a month.Help.
2006-10-24 17:34:01 · update #1
I just wanna extend more details on my problem/ question. The thing is that I know in my heart that the new guy isn't really someone who I may want to spend my life with. He is nothing, but little fling. I feel that the reason I have been obsessed over this guy is because of his excitement and the lack of trills in my current relationship. I guess I can secretly try to go out with the new guy behind my BF's back, but really, I will end up feeling guilty about it. I work with the new guy and see him almost everyday. I'm afraid I wont be able to resist the temtation. I really like my job, but should I quit to avoid dramas or should I just...er...help me sort this out. Thanks!!!
2006-10-26 14:01:07 · update #2
I think you've grown away from your current boyfriend. There's no 'spark' there anymore. You are a different person than you were when you first started going out, and the new you doesn't find him nearly as interesting as you once did.
I'm also guessing you're relatively young, and if so this 5-year relationship is probably one of the few relationships you've ever had, and probably the only one that you could call 'serious.' I'm guessing, so if I'm wrong please understand.
However...
You need to experience all life has to offer. How can you know what kind of man is best for you unless you get to know several different men? How can you learn to cope with different 'relationship' situations unless you experience them first-hand? How can you know what you want without knowing what the choices are?
I'd suggest you move on and give yourself a chance to grow. Don't be in a committed relationshiop for awhile and just 'date' casually. Give yourself a chance to grow and try some new things.
Once you've explored a bit, then you can confidently move forward. If you meet the perfect guy for you, you'll know it because of the life experiences you've had.
Best of luck to you...
2006-10-26 11:07:03 · answer #1 · answered by wrdsmth495 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should discuss this with your boyfriend. It seems like a weird thing to do, but since you guys have been together for 5 years just say you have a crush on this guy and you can't get your mind off of him. But tell your bf you love him (if you do that is). Maybe he will be able to help you... its just a crush it may be gone in a few months or so.
2006-10-24 17:34:44 · answer #2 · answered by Sammy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One thing is there forsure that you are attracted to different guys more than normal. You want to taste different guys at one time. As in your question you mentioned "again" asthe 1st world, it means these sort of things have happened to u previouisly also and you are habitual of all this . I think your basic nature is like that .
Its my suggestion to you that you better change your habit of tasting diffrent guys at one time And also you stay with yourbf at present . As you said you both have gone through lot of stuff , i think you have starting feeling bored by one type of stuff being used. You better learn different new ways of enjoyment and try withthe same bf so you will get different type of taste of differntstuff and this will gradually change your that habit
2006-10-24 17:48:40 · answer #3 · answered by soofi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wish that i could give you some advice but iam in the same kinda hole to right now wow you sound just like me me and my boyfriend have been together for 5 years to i wish i could help you i would like to help my self good luck
2006-10-24 17:38:25 · answer #4 · answered by heather 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave
2006-10-24 17:33:05 · answer #5 · answered by Mr. C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the best thing to do, is to unwind...think of and feel free to realize whom you really love!!! it's unfair to his side that you don't love him with all of your heart...it's cheating dear... Be honest with yourself, after all it is you who will take all consequences...
2006-10-25 00:23:56 · answer #6 · answered by she 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋