I' ve been separated almost four months and I can't get him out of my mind. I still have a relationship with him, but I seem more hooked than he does
2006-10-24 16:17:35 · 6 answers · asked by lauralei52 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Who wanted the divorce first? If he was the one wanting the divorce...well he has U wrapped around his finger to keep U at his beck and call while having his freedom to explore others too. Think about it.
2006-10-24 16:23:25 · answer #1 · answered by any1on 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will always have a connection with this man and you will always remember the good times and the bad times, oddly enough, tend to fade a bit over the years. That is why divorced couples sometimes reunite and remarry - because they have selectively put the bad times, and therefore many of the reasons for the divorce, away in their memories. However, since nothing has changed, these reunions almost always fail for the same reasons it did the first time around.
What you are feeling is completely normal and to be expected because there was a time you loved this man and that love connection will be there when you pull up the good memories. That is why couples must be very clear as to why they are taking the huge step of divorce - bigger still if there are children - that the marriage is beyond repair. Then, you both move on. Recognize the "addiction" for what it really is - your selective memory playing tricks on you.
These past four months or months before the separation should have been focussed on good marital therapy prior to the big decision unless adultery, addiction, alcohol or spouse abuse were present. Then, therapy is of no value.
2006-10-24 23:29:36 · answer #2 · answered by ALWAYS GOTTA KNOW 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are just trying to hang on to something that isn't there. Why continue a relationship through separation? If he's the one that left you then, wow, he gets to denounce all of the bindings of marriage but keep all of the perks?
See a therapist. You are probably experiencing anxiety as to what to do now and the evil that you know is better than the unknown. Try to maintain a polite distance and keep him out of your bed (and stay outta his, too!).
2006-10-24 23:26:43 · answer #3 · answered by greyrider 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I believe you are addicted to him. I have been watching this same situation with my ex-sister-in-law and my brother for the past three years. He has remarried since the divorce and has also divorced his second wife. My first ex sister in law has continued to see him on and off for the duration of their divorces. She calls this a booty call. He says he is in love with my second ex sister in law but he want stopping seeing the first one. Sounds like something for Jerry Springer doesn't it. Bottom line is if he won't comit to your relationship, walk away now.
2006-10-24 23:34:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you are not addicted to him you are just familiar with him and comfy with him.get out and meet some one new and that addiction will go away
2006-10-24 23:26:57 · answer #5 · answered by just_me_1955 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
what part of the ex- am I not getting here......
2006-10-24 23:31:48 · answer #6 · answered by willowz 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋