Was it alive? What did you do with it after? Did you have a funeral or does the hospital take care of the remains? Am I weird if I don't want to see the baby? I think it will upset me tremendously.
My waters have broke and the doctor says I will go into labor in the next 3 days and have to deliver. There is nothing I can do to stop it. I just need to be prepared and need to know what to do.
2006-10-24 14:59:17 · 14 answers · asked by stripedbook 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
sweetie this will be very tough. the baby will not make it but the baby will also not go through any pain. just keep thinking that. Get a good counselor lined up. Good luck you are in my prayers.
2006-10-24 15:01:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Oh, I'm so sorry for you and will be praying for you. However, it depends on the hospital, doctors, and strength of the baby. Some babies can be born weighing 1 pound and live. My niece had a baby at 20 weeks and he is 18 years old now and very healthy. Be prepared for the worst, but you just never know.
If the little one does not live and you don't see or hold him/her, you might one day be tremendously upset for not saying good-bye. If it were my baby and did not live, I would give it a name and have a funeral or a cremation (depending on how you feel).
Try to hold on and know that there are many prayers going up for you and your baby.
2006-10-24 15:09:43 · answer #2 · answered by Ms. G. 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Oh sweetie. I could not imagine what you are going thru and I am so sorry. My heart goes out to you. You never know what can happen. Your baby could make it. The chances are slim put it has happened before. I am not a religous person at all but I do firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. If you sweet baby doesn't make it you don't have to see the baby but like someone else suggested it would be a good idea for you to get someone to take pictures of the baby. You may never look at them but one day you may want to. You can't take that time back and change that decision. As far as arraingements go it is up to you how that is handles. The hospital chaplan can help you with this decision. I will be thinking about you and I am sorry that this is happening to you.
2006-10-24 15:21:33 · answer #3 · answered by buttons799 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you do not want to see the baby that is fine. Ask the hospital staff to take some pictures for you, and sometime in the future if you want to you can see pictures of your baby. They can also take footprints for you if you'd like. You may want to take a special blanket to wrap baby in.
In the hospital where I worked, we dressed the babies, wrapped them in beautiful little blankets and put them into little moses baskets. Every place will be different. Have someone talk to the hospital to see what they normally do after the birth...get all the information you need and want, that will help.
SANDS is a group in the UK for parents who have lost a baby early. They have a online forum you can participate in and they have a support page that you should have a look at. Parents talk about their experience and how they handled it...this is very helpful for a lot of people and it sounds like this is what you are looking for here, and you do not have to live in the UK to use or benefit from this site.
My heart goes out to you and your family, this is a very difficult time. I wish you all the best. Please send me an email if I can help further.
2006-10-24 15:14:55 · answer #4 · answered by Midwife Jane 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie you are now at the top of my prayer list. The chances of the baby's survival is slim to none I am sorry to say. Its totally understandable that you dont want to see the baby. Although I do think you will be left with a few unanswered questions ( ie what they would have looked like). No matter whether you see the baby or not it is going to upset you but just remember GOD has a plan for everyone even your little one. GOD BLESS and GOOD LUCK
2006-10-24 15:15:49 · answer #5 · answered by Oops! 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is a little hope. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. With the technology now, the baby could very well survive, but if it doesn't, you would not be weird if you didn't look at your baby. But you have to think if, later on, you will ever wonder what the baby looked like. If it does not make it, I woul arrange a funeral for it if I were you. I am sorry that you are having to go through this.
2006-10-24 15:15:09 · answer #6 · answered by Meighan L 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Following delivery of a stillborn, parents may be asked to provide consent for extensive evaluation of their baby. This evaluation involves many different studies, including an internal post-mortem examination (autopsy), a physical examination, photographs of the baby’s face, body, and any unusual features, X-rays, and genetic testing of some of the baby’s tissues. If permission is given, evaluations are started soon after the baby’s delivery. SO just be prepared if they ask you for your permission to do that.. they may bot but they should!!!! BUT These studies can be helpful for many reasons. They may provide answers or insight to some of your questions including the frequently asked, "Why did it happen?" and "Will it happen again?", as well as those about management and care in future pregnancies. Even if some questions remain unanswered, there may be comfort in knowing that as much as possible was learned about the baby and that important information may be added to medical knowledge which could help other babies in the future. As far as the remains go, If you give the hospital permission they will take care of it for you, you wont have to worry about funeral stuff.. typically in these cases most women dont.. But it is really sad and im sorry, my heart is breaking for you.. But just know that just because this one didnt make it doesn mean your next one wont...
2006-10-24 15:12:12 · answer #7 · answered by Fashion Diva 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No matter what you do you will be upset tremendously.
a baby has no chance of making it at just 20 weeks little chance at 24 weeks by 27 weeks 90% survival rate. . You can choose to see him or her often it helps to do so. YOU DON'T Have to see your baby it is a personal choice. I think you will be ask how you want the remains dealt with buried or cremated. I know a women who just lost a baby she chose not to see him and had no funeral for him he was burried in what's called potters field here in ohio. He has no one attend his funeral no name just a headstone with a # i personally could not have done it that way....for her she said she could not face the funeral.
2006-10-24 15:08:40 · answer #8 · answered by ally'smom 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for you. I don't think you are weird if you don't want to see the baby but you will always wonder what it looked like. I would definitely look at it and even take some picutres. It's your baby and after the pain eases you'll probably want to remember it. I think you will have to have a funeral of some sort since the baby is so far along. Good luck to you. I will keep you in my prayers.
2006-10-24 15:03:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You poor thing that is terrible i went through a similar thing at 16weeks it was the worst time ever. I know that it is possible for waters to break and still hang on for a month or even longer u should be in hospital having medication to stop the labour especially seeing you havn't started labour yet plus they put you on antibiotics to prevent infections cause your water has broken there are ways to stop labour are you in hospital i dont understand that they jus tell you in three days you will be in labour go straight to hospital and get a new doctor! You can still help your baby. Good luck.
2006-10-24 15:21:37 · answer #10 · answered by regankimmy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
James Elgin Gill (born on 20 could 1987 in Ottawa, Canada) became the earliest untimely toddler in the international. He became 128 days untimely (21 weeks and 5 days gestation) and weighed a million pound 6 oz (624 g). He survived and is very wholesome. Amillia Sonja Taylor, born Oct. 24 after in simple terms decrease than 22 weeks in the womb became in simple terms 9½ inches long and weighed decrease than 10 ozwhile she became extra by Caesarean area.
2016-10-16 09:03:39 · answer #11 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋