My husband and I have been seperated for over a year. Anyhow,six months ago, I met this guy in the culture chat room in yahoo. We both fell in love with each other hopelessly. We've exchanged pictures and called each other almost everyday and he knew my marital situation and he told me he loved me and would wait for me till I get the dirvorce..
Suddenly out of blue, right after I booked the flight to visit him , he told me the guilt of being a home wrecker caught up with him and he decided to break it off with me. I am so heart broken now. I thought I finally found someone after the troubled marriage. I have invested so much emotion in this relation...I understand that I did not started this relationship with a clean start; maybe I deserved my heart to be broken. However, I am still so hurt....How to heal? I want to get over this soon. What should I do with the plane ticket which I don't think I'll use it any more....Please help.
2006-10-24 14:54:30 · 30 answers · asked by bumblebeegaga 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Firstly dont go the fact that he has "cold feet" sounds like he just doesnt want the relationship. He was fully aware of your situation therefore he is not a home wrecker his just looking for an excuse to let you down nicely. Forget him meet someone worthy of you.
Good Luck
2006-10-24 15:03:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately both men and women can say anything while talking on the Internet. They may even feel close to the person they talk to but it is still safe.
This guy may have been completely untruthful with you. He may be married. Once you committed and he knew you were coming to him he had to find a way out.
This is the big chance we all take with someone we can't look in the eye. Nothing wrong with Internet romance. Many people have found and are married from finding each other that way. I am one of them.
But no one should ever commit there heart to someone until they meat. In fact that is the true start point of any relationship.
You are not the first and will not be the last to have this happen.
My son....a few years back......begin talking to this girl somewhere back east. They became...what he thought....close. He sent a picture....she sent hers. She was a very lovely woman.
My son made arrangements to go meet her. Bought the tickets and everything. By chance he showed the picture to my daughter.
She was shocked to realize this picture was of a movie star she had seen. She told him this and he ask her about it.
For some reason she didn't think she could meet him after all.
As hard as it is to accept now you are better of without him. Learn from this and next time do not fall before you meat him.
It can be done. I was 300 miles from the woman I married.
I came to see her on the weekends. We got to know each other that way and eventually married.
Don't give up hope. He is out there.....just not this guy.
2006-10-24 22:26:14 · answer #2 · answered by John B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may have been playing you. When you bought a ticket, it freaked him out and he knew the jig was up.
Exchange the plane ticket for some place like Italy or Paris. Take some time for yourself. Maybe you will find Mr. Right there and this was all for a reason. Don't give up. And no one deserves to be hurt
2006-10-24 22:02:52 · answer #3 · answered by Cat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard to deal with the Internet, because you really do not know whom you are chatting with. I would try to meet someone in person and ladies tell me that they pick up more guys at a grocery store than a bar.
I have even heard this from guys before as well.
I would say church, but church's have turned into a money source these days. Look how many church's that are being built and different groups now.
Good Luck
2006-10-24 22:00:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I give this man a big thumps up for realizing that your still married and he doesnt want to be involved while your still married. But you dont really know this man how can you have feelings like this for him I would be scared to meet someone from a chat line. And yes life will go on for you get this divorce and go out and find a good guy there are alot of them out there. Wait until after the divorce then try again.
2006-10-24 22:04:38 · answer #5 · answered by 2wild4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should have met him in real life before you thought you loved him.
How in the hell can you possibly fall in love with someone you've never met. How do you know anything REAL about him? How do you know those photos are of him?
He's calling it off because he didn't think things would go so far. He'll say anything to keep you away. He's probably unhappily married at doesn't want you to come out and screw up his marriage.
But then again, what do you really know about some phontom on the computer.
2006-10-24 21:58:30 · answer #6 · answered by Jerrid 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At this point I suggest you follow your brain not your heart!
Occupying your time with hobbies, friends and activities. Ask for refund and throw the ticket away! Stop dwelling because are not ready and emotionally fit to enter any relationship. You have to clean your mess from your seperated husband. Most importantly, you should love yourself 1st by giving yourself ample time to heal and break. Sorry it sound harsh but I am realistic. No men would take you unless you are ready(divorce and single) and love yourself! The internet guy might feel messy and pushed by you and you are not stable to carry on because you are still LEGALLY married!
Goodluck.
2006-10-24 22:32:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE was married though he may of told you differently. Understand this is a whole new world and what you read can no longer be held as the truth. As for the plane ticket see if you can get it moved to a different city and go for a vacation, or go visit relatives.
2006-10-24 22:14:54 · answer #8 · answered by ferretcoach 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Turn the ticket in a get credit for it. You'll go somewhere else later. He didn't think you'd come, that's why he bailed. He never expected you to nor wanted you to. He was B.S. ing you the whole time and you fell for it. You fell for it because of your broken marraige. Chalk it up to experience and move on.
Sorry to sound harsh, but that's what you need right now. You just don't know it .
2006-10-24 21:59:04 · answer #9 · answered by Jim C 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are better off without him. Get rid of the plane ticket and forget about him. If he tries to come back tell him no, that he hurt you too much. Start over nice and fresh, this time i suggest trying to find a man closer to your area.
2006-10-24 22:29:16 · answer #10 · answered by Violet 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋