she is alone and by herself... the babys father is in jail... i really cant help her cause i am about 4 hours away... i would like some help to know what i can do or what she can do.. she could go into labor at anytime and she is only 33 weeks. i would like some answers so i can let her know. She said she only has enough clothes for 1 week, no stroller, no car seat or crib. no one in her family will help. if someone can help me i would greatly appreciate it. She has no food to eat and has no doctor and no one will take her. The state wont help either. Does anyone have any solutions or anything to help me in some way.
Please?
2006-10-24 08:05:53 · 41 answers · asked by lilbutterflydevil 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
i know they're not trendy or wonderful but go along 2 second-hand/charity shops, she really can't afford 2 B choosy &
have a whip round 4 her between ur family/friends.
contact womens refuges or even the church in her area they mayb willing 2 help.
& as 4 abandoning a baby at the Firestation, should really only b considered if she really thinks she can't cope.
i must say it's an awful suggestion.
Is it really the 22nd century & single mothers r still treated like outcasts?
Shame on ur government, eh?
2006-10-24 08:16:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
She needs to look into local help centers in her area. My area has a pregnancy help center that will provide disadvantaged mothers with cribs, strollers, clothing etc, all for a very low cost or free. They will also advise her on her medical care options for the labor and delivery and may try to get her in for a check up now.
Also get her to post on her local freecycle. Info can be found at www.freecycle.org. I was able to get some items for my upcoming arrival this way.
Also contact her local Catholic Charities. You DO NOT need to be Catholic to access their services. They help everyone! She'll need to fill out some forms, etc, but they are very nice. Contact other local churches and food pantries. Many have food programs and baby oriented programs to help her.
For food: WIC will help her. It isn't much, but it is something. She should also qualify for food stamps.
Is she sure that she is 33 weeks? How does she know without seeing a doctor? If she seems like she's nearing labor now, it would be considered pre-term and that is not good. Have you contacted Medicaid for possible care? She needs to find someone ASAP.
If I knew what are you are in, I may be able to give more specific info. If you PM me, I could try to give you a little more help.
2006-10-24 08:18:11 · answer #2 · answered by Sativa 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Whoa Sweetie! Calm down and take a deep breath! I can certainly understand your concern for your friend but it does not do anyone any good to get so stressed out! Make yourself a cup of herbal tea ( or whatever calms you down) and lets look at this situation.
Okay, first of all I know for a FACT that there are federally funded programs that will help a pregnant woman. IF she is really in the dire straits that you say she is she can get help. I am not sure if it is Medicare of Medicaid ( I get the two mixed up) but I know that one or the other will help her. I do not know why she is telling you that they will not. I know for a fact that if she is pregnant there are several charity type programs that will help her. She can probably find a place that will even give her clothes for the baby. I also know that the hospital will have some type of program to aid her in getting a carseat. They cannot let her leave the hospital with the baby, in a car that does not have a proper restraint for the baby.
Maybe your friend is truly not aware of the programs that are out there. I cannot imagine that she is purposely trying to worry you. Tell her to look under the yellow pages for "Social Services", she will be able to find someone to help her.
Also check out the "Freecycle" websites in her city or area. They are literally all over the world. The stuff they give away is totally free and all she needs to do is go get it. Hard to believe but it is true. Just look under yahoo groups and she will find "Freecycle".
I could tell you more and be more specific if I knew what state she lives in but without knowing that I have told you all that I can.
Please do not worry yourself to death over this, she can get some help! I promise. The way our welfare system works women that are pregnant are given the most help, kids are next in line. The help is there, she just needs to ask for it.
If you want to write to me with some more information I will be happy to talk to you. You can give her my email address and I will be happy to tell her these things myself.
Love and Blessings
Lady T~
2006-10-24 08:49:42 · answer #3 · answered by Lady Trinity 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I may be wrong on this one, BUT! If this is how the Baby's live is going to start, I must say that the live from here on out does not seem all that bright. I know things change and things don't always go the way we would like them too, but dayum she has had 33 weeks to get the help she needed from her state and local agentes, but she did not for what ever reason... So save the child the life that it seems it is looking toward and place the child up for adoption, give the child a better look at life then it is being presented now, by all means
2006-10-24 08:35:46 · answer #4 · answered by Alex 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Definitely check out your local free listings on craigslist.com, they have a whole free section and you could even fill out a wanted ad for her describing the issue. I saw a woman do the same thing last week and she had everthing from crib to clothes to formula donated and delivered by the nice people in her community. There is a govt program call WAC that can help with food and diapers when the baby is born, all she has to do is apply for it. I know by using these resources you can help her out. Best Wishes and God Bless!!
2006-10-24 08:11:36 · answer #5 · answered by krista_focus 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The state won't help? Oh, yes they will - she's not asking the right people. Check into WIC, which can provide food for mother and baby.
I went to a baby class that gave a free car seat for attendance. She should check with the local Goodwill, even her local Freecycle, for assistance on anything from clothes to baby furniture.
2006-10-24 08:08:46 · answer #6 · answered by Zyrilia 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
She had better get on welfare. I'm surprised she hasn't been thinking about thins in the first trimester. She can get health care a little cash and food stamps.
They even help pay for child care and help her with job training and placement.
I know it isn't the way to go but when i was in high school a girl i was friends with had been kicked out by her parents and by the time she gave birth she was ready to go, they go her a nice apartment to.
It's not a solution but it will keep her head above water until her can get herself together
2006-10-24 08:12:15 · answer #7 · answered by lamikashi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your friend is lying to you. Welfare will give any single mother medicaid for the whole duration of the pregnancy, foodstamps and refer her to WIC...and they will refer her to an agency for a free carseat. Where is she living and how is she making rent? I don't know what state you are in, but there are plenty of churches and organizations that will lend a hand....some may have a waiting list, but it's better than nothing. Look in the phone book, you could find a lot of resources there and since you have access to the internet, you can look up things online as well. There's a lot of resources out there, you just have to look and keep looking. And food banks help, too.
2006-10-24 08:23:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm not sure why the state won't help. Even if your friend is a illigal immigrant, she can still get on welfare. If she's not comfortable with that, definately try the Salvation Army and local churches. They often have really good programs in place. And, btw, I don't blame your friend for not wanting to give her child up for adoption, that's a personal decision that is really hard to make and if she wants to fight hard to provide for her baby and keep it, then she should.
2006-10-24 08:15:48 · answer #9 · answered by redzodd 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The state "won't" help? The state HAS to help if she goes to family services and fills out the proper paperwork. The Salvation Army and most local churches also have some sort of network set up to provide some sort of assistance in cases like these. This doesn't make sense. How has she gotten this far in her pregnancy without knowing about any of these services? Does your friend live out in the country?
2006-10-24 08:15:08 · answer #10 · answered by badkitty1969 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋