Is it a decision you make in your head or does it need to be backed up by actions such as avoiding the person in question?I guess what im asking is: Is it possible to detach without actually avoiding the person in question?
2006-10-24 05:38:41 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
In all my breakups I have never been able to keep in touch with the person while detaching myself emotionally because you have a past with that person so its not the same anymore. It takes time to heal and time isnt the healer. You have to decide that this is really over and start living your life again like before you knew him. You have to refrain from seeing each other and refrain from communicating through phone, internet...etc. I'm telling you that its a healing process. .
2006-10-24 05:43:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both, once you've resolved yourself to detaching from the individual you must back it up with action. It helps not to be around the person at all to be honest but if you want to test yourself by all means do it without avoiding the person, I've had to do it both ways but beware the boomerang effect!
It's best to constantly remind yourself of the reason the person should no longer be a part of your life then the process of seperating emotionally will be an easier transition. Go numb & nonchalant if you chose to deal with the person(not in your best interest but if forced to been there done that).
If you are around the person it's always best to have a buffer, someone else you can pay attention to. Needing to seperate yourself from someone is less painful if you do indeed seperate from the individual. Not everyone is made the same tho if this person's actions are so repulsive on a daily basis it may be in your best interest to use aversion therapy to your advantage, good luck !
2006-10-24 13:01:04 · answer #2 · answered by tae 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For me to detach emotionally I also have to pull away from the person. I think it is a decision you make in your head but if your around them all the time it gets to be hard to do.
2006-10-24 12:48:29 · answer #3 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To detach from my ex, it started with his actions and then I really had to ponder divorce. After I told him I wanted a divorce, I detached myself. Every time we talked I'd look at him and think about all the horrible things he ever did and blocked out the nice times. It sounds harsh, but don't let the good times block out the bad, otherwise you'll just start doubting your decision. Be cold and calm with a steely glare.
Sucks to have to do, but sometimes it needs to be done. Be it an SO or family member.
2006-10-24 12:51:49 · answer #4 · answered by chefgrille 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is. IF you want to become detached from someone the best thing to do is go out and try to find someone else and get over that person that way. You don't necessarily have to avoid the person to become detached from them. Believe me I have been in the same position you're in. So my advice is go out and try to find someone else and get over them that way. You can still talk to them, but if it doesn't help you to get over them by talking to them then don't talk to them for a while. Try it and if it doesn't work then I don't know what to tell you. But that's what I did and it worked. So if it doesn't work then Sorry for the bad advice.
2006-10-24 12:46:23 · answer #5 · answered by djdapimp21 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say why you wanted to detach yourself from this person. And if you don't want to avoid the person, why would you want to detach emotionally?
2006-10-24 12:44:04 · answer #6 · answered by Shayna 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it's not.If you continually see this person or talk to them constantly you will never be able to let go.I think you should just give yourself some time away from them.Hopefully later on you can be friends again.
2006-10-24 13:04:03 · answer #7 · answered by CONFUSED 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
man that **** is ******* hard..you could take years or your whole life to detach from a person
2006-10-24 12:43:37 · answer #8 · answered by Lovely Lady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think it's possible.
2006-10-24 12:42:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋