I went out with this guy, we will call him Joey. Joey and I went out for about 4 months, he was my first serious physical relationship. Although it didn't last long, no I love you's were exchanged or anything, I was fond of him. I broke up with him because he had no goals and didn't appreciate me. In the months following, and its been about 4 we have been having casual sex about 1-2 times per month. Sometimes I don't even want to, but he bothers me with texts and calls all the time and I feel bad, so I go over there. Its really dumb, I know he isn't the one, but I don't want to go without some booty and seeing him occasionally is nice, and the sex is good (but not great, just good). Should I just throw in the towel, if so how do I do that? Or should I see what might come of it?
2006-10-24 04:04:16 · 10 answers · asked by Fran Y 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If you broke up with him, you should just leave the guy alone and stop hurting yourself. Maybe right now you might not hurt yourself, but in the long run your going to be feeling it. Your just having casual sex and you think it's just good. Just leave the guy and his sex. Find someone who you really love or like. I mean with my other boyfriends I never had sex until I got married, but that's only because I took my virginity serious, but I trust you that if your with some one who you love or like the sex will be great. Don't give in just because he's bothering you. I don't want to offend you, but if I do I'm sorry. It's almost as if your comparing yourself to one of the women on the street, but with you he's getting it free. Any time he want sex, not you, but every time he has that urge you give in. Give your self some respect. I'm pretty sure you can get some one who appreciates you and not just think about the sex. Hope you luck!
2006-10-24 04:16:55 · answer #1 · answered by shy_gal2 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Keep him around for a booty call now and then. I think you should hold out longer and build up that craving for it. There isn't anything wrong with casual sex. Just make sure you use protection. The last thing you want (and this happens too much) is to get pregnant by a booty call.
Also, you can utilize him to gain some experience and maybe some experimenting.
Sex is just sex, so be careful to keep the emotions out of the bed. Just keep him as a friend (with benifits).
2006-10-24 11:17:40 · answer #2 · answered by Jerrid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fran,
Non-great booty is better than no booty at all. It sounds like you're almost looking at this in an emotionally healthy way - ALMOST. This guy will never be anything more than a booty call for you, or at least YOU SHOULDN'T LET HIM BE. You said he didn't appreciate you, well that's just too darn bad for him.
You don't have to "throw in the towel" completely (why give up the sex that you like), but you would be better off emotionally if you went ahead and made the jump to looking at this guy as what he is, he is YOUR booty call and not worthy of being anything else.
One of the biggest problems most people have is that they put too many EXPECTATIONS on everything. "If I do this then that means he SHOULD do that", "If he does X it means he's thinking that". Don't fall for that old crap. You don't have to be headed for marriage with every person you date. If there is something you like doing with someone (it could be playing tennis, it could be going to movies, it could be like you are with this guy and the thing you like doing could be having sex) focus on that with that person. You don't have to give up the things you enjoy with someone just because you've figured out this person isn't going to be the "love of your life".
When you find another guy, someone who you can share everything with, then KICK THIS CURRENT GUY TO THE CURB. Until then have fun but remember to ALWAYS practice safer sex. ESPECIALLY with your BOOTY CALL BOY.
2006-10-24 11:09:11 · answer #3 · answered by ScubaGuy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
WOW!!!! If you are not really enjoying it then what are you still doing there? also do you really want to be and or be intimate with a guy who only wants you for sex? I think not. There is more guys out there and you'll find one. Now tell him its over and that this arrangement is not working. I mean her is not feeding your sexual or emotional needs and it seems to me that he is getting more out of it than you are.
2006-10-24 11:26:59 · answer #4 · answered by M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must have a purpose or aim. It is not a good idea to casually do something especially when there is no commitment. It will not take you anywhere. It is always sensible to look for lasting relationships. You must give up relations which have no future.
2006-10-24 11:13:37 · answer #5 · answered by openpsychy 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should invest your ridiculous actions in some more creative and productive actions like focusing more on work or school and finding a man who will appreciate you and not use you for sex and who you won't use for sex. That is essentially what you 2 are doing and it is not fair to neither one of you'll since you both know it is not meant to be.
2006-10-24 11:08:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
get on with your life, you will give yourself a chance to find a better one and have great sex instead of good sex!
2006-10-24 11:08:55 · answer #7 · answered by wantstoknow 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
move on. set yourself free.
2006-10-24 11:06:35 · answer #8 · answered by Grasshopper 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump him
2006-10-24 11:45:46 · answer #9 · answered by jake s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋